My downstairs neighbors have really loud sex.

How's that for an intro?

Ugh. Me and my friend have rented the main floor of a house for over a year now. There is a couple that rents the basement. This is a bit of an older house so I'm thinking there isn't great insulation/sound proofing between the floors. Under normal circumstances, we can hear the mumblings of our downstairs buddies conversations. Depending on where you stand, you can hear some pretty clear words.

About a month after we moved, my roommate asks me to come to her bedroom for a minute for me to listen to something. Yup, that's for sure them going at it. Loudly. I mean, this girl is a screamer. When they have sex, we can hear crystal clear what she is saying. We can even hear, what I can only assume from her yells, him "slapping that ass".

Honestly, it didn't bother me too much. I'm grown up. I understand sex. When it happened, we would laugh about and turn up the music, television show, movie whatever. We just drowned it out. That is, until last Friday night happened.

My Mom, Dad, and younger brother (just turned 18!) came to visit me (I've moved away for school) and stayed the night at my house. We went to bed around midnight after visiting. I gave my bed up to my parents and me and my bro slept on couches in the living room. About ten minutes later the tenants downstairs came home.

You can see where this is going...

So they start going at. Yup, my parents are in the next room, me and my brother are trying to sleep and all I can hear is "oh baby!" moaning, banging headboard and thrusting. Yes, we can hear the thrusting.

I was horrified.

They were at it for an hour. My roommate was out and came home about half way through it. She said she could hear them outside. OUTSIDE.

I have never been so mad at people in my entire life. And of course I couldn't sleep for that whole time. So all I did was stew. Stew in my anger. And think about writing this post and sharing my embarrassment with you all!

I so badly want to leave them a passive aggressive note. I'm moving out in about a month, so I wont. This is just a vent. But I've really thought about what I would say. I think I would keep it short and sweet:

Dear neighbors,

We can hear what you say upstairs when you are talking normally.

When you moan and yell, we can hear you crystal clear.

Thanks for the show on Friday,

Sincerely,
Upstairs tenants and their visiting family.



And... vent complete. Anyone else got an embarrassing story about "noisy" neighbors?