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Lyrical
Why skimpy costumes on girls?
By Dancingdaddy Comments: 6, member since Sun Nov 02, 2014
On Sun Nov 02, 2014 11:35 AM

I think this might be better placed in jazz but I can't find a forum for it.


I have been thinking about enrolling my daughter in dance, particularly jazz as it seems like it would be really enjoyable.


I totally understand that she will have to wear skimpy costumes - but then swimming costumes are skimpy. From watching some videos, I know there are real jazz techniques like the pelvic thrust (seems to be used a lot from the dance videos I've seen) and that she may have to do sexual moves at times. I've no problem with any of this - whatever it takes to win. I also understand that the skimpy costumes are practical, both for the heat of the stage and so the judges can see body movement properly.


But then my question is WHY just the girls? I've not seen many boys in jazz dance videos, but the ones I have seen have been fully covered up (whilst the girls haven't been) other than two guys who were just wearing shorts (no idea whether they also have a "no underwear" rule).


Is it so that, from a distance, the audience can tell who are girls (the ones in the skimpy clothing) and who are not? And doesn't this put the boys at a disadvantage if the judges can't see their lines properly?


So what's the reason? Is there a legitimate reason for the girls to wear skimpy clothing and the boys not to, or is it something more perverted and that's why sexual moves are used, to get encouragement from, well not sure I'm allowed to use the word here, so let's say "inappropriate adults"? If that's the case it doesn't bother me - nobody is going to be touching her, but is that the reason or is it more innocent?


It just seems inconsistent.

27 Replies to Why skimpy costumes on girls?

re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By hummingbird Comments: 10410, member since Mon Apr 18, 2005
On Sun Nov 02, 2014 12:36 PM
You don't have to send her to a studio that uses skimpy costumes there are many who make a point of not using them, it's your choice.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls?
By Dancingdaddy Comments: 6, member since Sun Nov 02, 2014
On Sun Nov 02, 2014 11:36 PM
There's not much option in my area, but regardless I'd still like to know what the reasoning is
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By YumYumDoughnutPremium member Comments: 8688, member since Sat Jul 10, 2004
On Sun Nov 02, 2014 11:49 PM
Edited by YumYumDoughnut (99333) on 2014-11-02 23:54:25
Edited by YumYumDoughnut (99333) on 2014-11-03 00:16:21
Part of it has to do with trend.

There are a lot of dance shows that show dancers in skimpy clothing. For example, the students on Dance Moms wear a sports bra and shorts to class. They also wear two pieces on stage. It usually starts with high school girls wearing the skimpy clothing, and the younger students pick up on the trend and copy.

On stage, about 15 years ago when I was at competitions, the older girls wore skimpier stuff. Not many people in the 10 and under category wore skimpy clothing. It seems like things are getting more skimpy and skimpy for the regular world too. With Tweens having unlimited access to social media, they see role models wearing the skimpy stuff.

I highly doubt that a dance teacher are putting children in skimpy clothing so that perverts are getting their rocks off. I think the innocent reason is that it is a big trend, so some people are following blindly.

Boys also sometimes are topless on stage, which isn't exactly the same thing as shorts on girls. I feel like it is less trendy for boys though because their adult role models in the media....aren't really wearing sexy stuff like women are. Male actors are less likely to act sexy in skimpy clothing, unless it is Poolboy in a tv show.

I feel like sometimes the dancing does get suggestive, but when I see a 10 year old doing a hip thrust, I don't see it as sexual. I mean, the action itself is sexual, but I don't think " sex" when I see a kid doing it. Does that make any sense?

I think sexual things are sometimes thrown in to showcase " sassy" or " attitude" and kids are cheering for each other with things like " work it girl!". I don't think it is meant to be sexually appealing, and being in the dance world for so long, I sometimes forget how it comes across to " normal" non dancing people.

I do have to caution that maybe the attitude of " whatever it takes to win" or " I don't care if perverts are looking if they don't touch" is going to be helpful in the long run. As a parent, if you feel uncomfortable with a situation, you are allowed to speak up to the director or teacher. The professional dance industry CAN be a bit sketchy at times, ( I have a few friends who work as dancers in Hollywood and Vegas....and sex does sometimes play a role in casting). So, knowing this, if I had a daughter in dance, I would make sure to let her know that she doesn't need to do anything she is uncomfortable with, even if it means losing a part and leaving a bad studio.
If I had a daughter, I would not feel so comfortable with my kid being gawked at by perverts or doing whatever it took to win. I feel like dance is more of an art, and even if she doesn't " win" a competition by refusing to wear skimpy outfits....that still isn't losing. Dance education isn't only about scores and trophies. The quality of education is a lot more important.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By hummingbird Comments: 10410, member since Mon Apr 18, 2005
On Mon Nov 03, 2014 07:41 AM
I'm just really confused as to why there would be inappropriate adults at your kids dance school anyway. Don't all adults who work with children have to get police clearance?
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 2)
By imadanseurPremium member Comments: 16604, member since Thu Dec 04, 2003
On Mon Nov 03, 2014 01:59 PM
Edited by imadanseur (79325) on 2014-11-03 13:59:57 ..
Not in the United States. We don't have to get clearance for dance studios.

Competition costumes are usually more elaborate and often "skimpier" than regular recital costumes, but in general there are plenty of costumes that aren't inappropriate, and there are plenty of videos that aren't doing "pelvic thrusts."

Good judges don't need skimpy costumes to judge a dance. They are just on use of the stage, costuming, technique, musicality etc. I can tell what is wrong with kid's technique even with a sweatshirt on.

In general young boys are very self conscious about dancing and getting teased, so putting them in clothes they are willing to wear and perform is VERY important. Girls often like to get dressed up, love the sparkles, etc. As a judge...you often aren't as critical of boys in competition because you want to support them being involved in this art form.

You wouldn't know a girl on stage from a boy if they were dressed in similar clothes? REALLY?? Now I just think you are pulling my leg with this post especially when you even float the idea that it is because perverted adults are doing something inappropriate with these kids. That is a sick accusation. Best you find your kid another kind of activity...take up painting, softball, or piano lessons.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By YumYumDoughnutPremium member Comments: 8688, member since Sat Jul 10, 2004
On Mon Nov 03, 2014 02:28 PM
I think this person is saying that dance teachers are using suggestive stuff, to get better scores and encouragement from perverts who might be at the competition such as the audience members or judges. Not that the teachers themselves are perverted.

I think we can all admit that sometimes studios do indeed go out of comfort zone, which is why we sometimes have debates that pop up on the teachers forums here,

I did get fingerprinted and I can assure you that I do not put kids in suggestive costumes for a better score or for perverts to get their rocks off.
If you are uncomfortable with these costumes, put your child in a ballet class. They usually are covered more and tend to use less songs with lyrics in them.
How old is your daughter?
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 4)
By Sumayah Comments: 6875, member since Wed Nov 12, 2008
On Mon Nov 03, 2014 10:31 PM
Edited by Sumayah (204191) on 2014-11-03 22:34:01 my phone believes that p is a vovel and should replace all o's from hencefprth
Edited by Sumayah (204191) on 2014-11-03 22:34:36 my phone believes that p is a vowel and should replace all o's from hencefprth
Dancingdaddy wrote:

I've no problem with any of this - whatever it takes to win.


AAAA nd that right there is why I hate competitions. No, it's not whatever it takes to win. It's whatever it takes to foster a love of dance, an appreciation for fine arts, for building outstanding athleticism while maintaining the esthetic of line and form, for growing as a person by celebrating success *and* loss. And I mean both as a teammate and as an individual. Winning or losing gracefully and supporting teammates who did better/worse builds character and integrity.

I disagree with the mindset that you have do anything you can just to win. Who you are as a person determines who you are as a dancer. Being a good person who doesn't compromise their personal ethics for temporary and subjective wins is way more important to me than someone who is fine with turning a blind eye against something they aren't 100% behind just to win. You might reconsider your position in all of this. If you have a problem with skimpy costumes then say no. That is your right. You are allowed to look at a costume and say absolutely not, because it goes against your moral or ethical code. They aren't holding your child against her will and forcing her into these costumes, it is your choice to allow whether she wears then and participates in "pelivc thrusts" onstage.

It's just a jump to the left...
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By LoriCook Comments: 1762, member since Mon Aug 17, 2009
On Tue Nov 04, 2014 01:48 AM
And this is why I love highland dance. No sexy hair, makeup or clothes. Everything is covered except if the kilt flips up and the granny briefs show. No hip thrusting, grinding, shimmies or "sassy" moves.

There are many different dance options out there and surely you can find one that works for your family. The fact that you say don't care what your kid wears or does to win troubles me. You must care or you wouldn't be asking questions. You should care! Children need guidance on what is ok or you end up with Miley Cyrus.

We are a sexualized society. We allow our girls to look like women. We are beginning to be more aware and trying to change. You see it in some dance forms, like Irish, which are trying to rein things in. Even highland is discouraging changing clothes in the open, running around in sports bras etc. There are dance teacher like d4j and Christine who pick out modest clothing and songs. Look at all of your options and ask the studio owner questions before signing up.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By dance4ballet Comments: 1202, member since Mon Dec 03, 2007
On Tue Nov 04, 2014 03:47 AM
"I've no problem with any of this - whatever it takes to win. I also understand that the skimpy costumes are practical, both for the heat of the stage and so the judges can see body movement properly."

"so let's say "inappropriate adults"? If that's the case it doesn't bother me - nobody is going to be touching her"

Thee is something seriously wrong with you as a parent if you are okay with perverts potentially looking at your young daughter, and not caring if she is sexualised. You need to be evaluated for psychiatric help.

I would NEVER be okay with any child being sexualised so that they can win.

In Australia, the American style dance competitions are just becoming a trend, there are still plenty of studios who use age-appropriate costumes, dance moves and music.

If she one day might want a career in dance, whether she won a title at age 7 or learned risqué moves that young DOESN'T MATTER. The REAL winners are the kids who end up with a career at the end - and they are usually the ones who have solid training, NOT trendy risqué moves at a young age!

Find a studio who will nurture her love of dance and provide excellent training, NOT teach her to dance like beyonce at age 7!

A good place to start is a ballet academy - dancers who have exceptional ballet training excel in other styles, including jazz.

Here are some videos of jazz dance done in an age appropriate way:

First:
www.youtube.com . . .
Although the costume is very questionable, the child shows great ability to use isolations (important jazz technique) within a dance. Isolations are movements which literally isolate apart of the body... The 'hip isolations' you are talking about can be taught and used in a dance without looking crude.

Second:
www.youtube.com . . .
This is more the thing you would see for a child age 10 and under in Australia!!!

Third:
www.youtube.com . . .
Talented Australian child, very solid technique and flexibility and very age appropriate!

Fourth:
www.youtube.com . . .
Song and tap.

Australian's like our dancers wholesome and although American style competition is infiltrating, the majority of children still wear cute, kid friendly costumes and have cute kid friendly dancers! And Australia producers performers who travel all over the world!!!
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 4)
By LoriCook Comments: 1762, member since Mon Aug 17, 2009
On Tue Nov 04, 2014 06:49 AM
The more I read this thread the more of a troll this poster seems to be. I don't know of any real dads who would make these statements. I vote troll.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By imadanseurPremium member Comments: 16604, member since Thu Dec 04, 2003
On Tue Nov 04, 2014 08:08 AM
I think this person is saying that dance teachers are using suggestive stuff, to get better scores and encouragement from perverts who might be at the competition such as the audience members or judges.


I don't know any judges who aren't teachers as well.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By majeremember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 5889, member since Sat Sep 29, 2007
On Tue Nov 04, 2014 11:49 AM
The dance studio I grew up in has a no bare mid-drift policy. A few years after I left they started doing competitions and have been doing well.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By Theresamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 34891, member since Wed May 22, 2002
On Tue Nov 04, 2014 12:06 PM
We take great pains - GREAT. PAINS. to keep our costumes and music age appropriate, and do quite well. We had a group win Overall at Nationals this summer, and they were in long sleeves and pants - and a hat! About as covered up as they could be, and continue to do their jobs.

I believe in competition, I think there's great value in it. However, if I had to sexualize my kid to win a trophy, I'd skip it.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By Theresamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 34891, member since Wed May 22, 2002
On Tue Nov 04, 2014 03:18 PM
Just had another thought.

If I went to a studio that HAD to oversexualize young girls - if they had them out there in sexual outfits, doing sexual moves, and that was what HAD to happen in order for the girls to win...they wouldn't be my studio long.

But I also suspect that much of your story is false (in fact, the majority of it...I grew up with three younger sisters, and over my dads DEAD BODY would he have been ok with us doing sexual moves, in teeny tiny outfits, just for trophies), so I suppose I've already expended too much energy on it.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls?
By Dancingdaddy Comments: 6, member since Sun Nov 02, 2014
On Sat Nov 22, 2014 04:49 PM
It's interesting (and sexist) that when a man writes about this, you claim he's a troll.

From searching the forum, I found out I am not the only person to ask a similar question. But I am the only person to ask why the boys aren't made to as well.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls?
By Dancingdaddy Comments: 6, member since Sun Nov 02, 2014
On Sat Nov 22, 2014 05:00 PM
YumYumDoughnut wrote:

Part of it has to do with trend.

There are a lot of dance shows that show dancers in skimpy clothing. For example, the students on Dance Moms wear a sports bra and shorts to class. They also wear two pieces on stage. It usually starts with high school girls wearing the skimpy clothing, and the younger students pick up on the trend and copy.

On stage, about 15 years ago when I was at competitions, the older girls wore skimpier stuff. Not many people in the 10 and under category wore skimpy clothing. It seems like things are getting more skimpy and skimpy for the regular world too. With Tweens having unlimited access to social media, they see role models wearing the skimpy stuff.

I highly doubt that a dance teacher are putting children in skimpy clothing so that perverts are getting their rocks off. I think the innocent reason is that it is a big trend, so some people are following blindly.

Boys also sometimes are topless on stage, which isn't exactly the same thing as shorts on girls. I feel like it is less trendy for boys though because their adult role models in the media....aren't really wearing sexy stuff like women are. Male actors are less likely to act sexy in skimpy clothing, unless it is Poolboy in a tv show.


Boys are hardly ever topless though, but the rest of what you said explains things a bit.

I feel like sometimes the dancing does get suggestive, but when I see a 10 year old doing a hip thrust, I don't see it as sexual. I mean, the action itself is sexual, but I don't think " sex" when I see a kid doing it. Does that make any sense?


Yeah, I know the children don't see it as sexual even if it is sexual.

I think sexual things are sometimes thrown in to showcase " sassy" or " attitude" and kids are cheering for each other with things like " work it girl!". I don't think it is meant to be sexually appealing, and being in the dance world for so long, I sometimes forget how it comes across to " normal" non dancing people.

I do have to caution that maybe the attitude of " whatever it takes to win" or " I don't care if perverts are looking if they don't touch" is going to be helpful in the long run. As a parent, if you feel uncomfortable with a situation, you are allowed to speak up to the director or teacher. The professional dance industry CAN be a bit sketchy at times, ( I have a few friends who work as dancers in Hollywood and Vegas....and sex does sometimes play a role in casting). So, knowing this, if I had a daughter in dance, I would make sure to let her know that she doesn't need to do anything she is uncomfortable with, even if it means losing a part and leaving a bad studio.
If I had a daughter, I would not feel so comfortable with my kid being gawked at by perverts or doing whatever it took to win. I feel like dance is more of an art, and even if she doesn't " win" a competition by refusing to wear skimpy outfits....that still isn't losing. Dance education isn't only about scores and trophies. The quality of education is a lot more important.


But if she was really comfortable in a dance studio, or it was the only one nearby, I wouldn't want to take her out of something that she really enjoyed and upset her.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls?
By Dancingdaddy Comments: 6, member since Sun Nov 02, 2014
On Sat Nov 22, 2014 05:03 PM
imadanseur wrote:

Not in the United States. We don't have to get clearance for dance studios.

Competition costumes are usually more elaborate and often "skimpier" than regular recital costumes, but in general there are plenty of costumes that aren't inappropriate, and there are plenty of videos that aren't doing "pelvic thrusts."

Good judges don't need skimpy costumes to judge a dance. They are just on use of the stage, costuming, technique, musicality etc. I can tell what is wrong with kid's technique even with a sweatshirt on.

In general young boys are very self conscious about dancing and getting teased, so putting them in clothes they are willing to wear and perform is VERY important. Girls often like to get dressed up, love the sparkles, etc. As a judge...you often aren't as critical of boys in competition because you want to support them being involved in this art form.


Good points. That explains why girls have to wear skimpy clothing and boys don't.

You wouldn't know a girl on stage from a boy if they were dressed in similar clothes? REALLY?? Now I just think you are pulling my leg with this post especially when you even float the idea that it is because perverted adults are doing something inappropriate with these kids. That is a sick accusation. Best you find your kid another kind of activity...take up painting, softball, or piano lessons.


I was going to thank you for answering my question but then you end with a silly comment.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By hummingbird Comments: 10410, member since Mon Apr 18, 2005
On Sat Nov 22, 2014 09:51 PM
That explains why girls have to wear skimpy clothing and boys don't.


No it doesn't! It explains why many boys won't wear more revealing costumes that's all, the answer also tells you that you don't need revealing costumes it's just some studios that prefer them, lets face it that is their choice.


I was going to thank you for answering my question but then you end with a silly comment.


Why's this a silly comment? If you don't like what the only studio in your area is doing get into another activity, there are plenty to choose from.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls?
By ChristinePremium member Comments: 6815, member since Wed Feb 04, 2009
On Sun Nov 23, 2014 06:41 PM
Edited by Christine (207347) on 2014-11-23 18:52:35 mark up mess
Dancingdaddy wrote:


I totally understand that she will have to wear skimpy costumes - but then swimming costumes are skimpy. From watching some videos, I know there are real jazz techniques like the pelvic thrust (seems to be used a lot from the dance videos I've seen) and that she may have to do sexual moves at times. I've no problem with any of this - whatever it takes to win.


You TOTALLY understand? Congratulation... I have seven kids of my own, I am a certified dance master and have taught dance for years, and I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT!

I also understand that the skimpy costumes are practical, both for the heat of the stage and so the judges can see body movement properly.


Any judge worth the title doesn't need to see a child in a skimpy costume to judge their lines. As for the heat on the stage, yes, stage lights are hot. However, the actual amount of time spent directly under the lights is rarely longer than 5 minutes at a time.

But then my question is WHY just the girls? I've not seen many boys in jazz dance videos, but the ones I have seen have been fully covered up (whilst the girls haven't been) other than two guys who were just wearing shorts (no idea whether they also have a "no underwear" rule).


Yum Yum gave a very fair explanation of this gender inequality. Most often in dance schools the girls outnumber the boys exponentially. One of the traps studio owners fall into is to only consider costuming for the girls and almost as an afterthought put the boys in white tops and black bottoms, sometimes with an accessory to match the girls. The result? The boys all look like waiters but the judges can still see their placement, turnout, etc. As to the "no underwear rule" boys wear a dancers belt, an undergarment similar to an athletic supporter in function.

So what's the reason? Is there a legitimate reason for the girls to wear skimpy clothing and the boys not to,


NO.

or is it something more perverted and that's why sexual moves are used, to get encouragement from, well not sure I'm allowed to use the word here, so let's say "inappropriate adults"? If that's the case it doesn't bother me - nobody is going to be touching her, but is that the reason or is it more innocent?


I don't even know which part of this sentence to address first. Saying you aren't bothered by the idea of "inappropriate adults" leering at your child so long as "nobody is going to be touching her" is, frankly, disturbing. I actually read a newspaper report years ago about a kiddy porn trial where the accused mother insisted that "it's just pictures!" (wish I could find it to re-post here)

As to the "sexual moves", there is a big difference between jazz isolations and pelvic thrusts. The current trend to rush adulthood at the expense of childhood is damaging and totally unnecessary. There are many, MANY, dance studios who do not exploit children this way. There are MANY age appropriate songs available for any SO with integrity to choose for young children. Disney, anyone? Musical theatre? I'm sorry you don't have a school in your area with skills to teach classic jazz without requiring little girls to shake their money makers, but perhaps there is an alternative of which you are unaware. If you'd feel comfortable posting your general location, perhaps some DDN members might be able to make some helpful suggestions.

How old is your daughter?

I know you didn't ask parenting advice, but on behalf of all young girls, I would respectfully suggest that self respect needs to be instilled in children at an early age. To communicate to any child that inappropriate performances are ok...whatever it takes to win.... just seems too far removed from my concept of a protective, loving dad.

I'm sure you wish your daughter the very best in life. Please think this POV through before you put her in an Itsy Bitsy Tiny Weenie Yellow Poka Dot Bikini.

(please notice even Miss Piggy... and "adult muppet" is modestly attired without missing the fun....)


Keep On Dancing*
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls?
By ChristinePremium member Comments: 6815, member since Wed Feb 04, 2009
On Sun Nov 23, 2014 07:15 PM
Dancingdaddy wrote:



Boys are hardly ever topless though


Depending on the number, sometimes they are. Tarzan, The Jungle Book, Pass the Peace Pipe, and many Lion King numbers lend themselves to this, although generally speaking, this too is unnecessary. Adults... different story. Alvin Ailey?

But if she was really comfortable in a dance studio, or it was the only one nearby, I wouldn't want to take her out of something that she really enjoyed and upset her.


Wait.... she isn't even in a school yet! YOU are the adult here. (or a troll... not sure yet) If she had a boyfriend who was a heroin dealer and she really enjoyed him would you allow it for fear of upsetting her? Please...

Again... how old is your daughter? How long have you been a parent? Is she your biological child or are you new to this?

Keep On Dancing*
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By majeremember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 5889, member since Sat Sep 29, 2007
On Sun Nov 23, 2014 11:37 PM
Christine wrote:

Dancingdaddy wrote:



Boys are hardly ever topless though


Depending on the number, sometimes they are. Tarzan, The Jungle Book, Pass the Peace Pipe, and many Lion King numbers lend themselves to this, although generally speaking, this too is unnecessary. Adults... different story. Alvin Ailey?


I was about to say professional dancers is a different story.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By LoriCook Comments: 1762, member since Mon Aug 17, 2009
On Mon Nov 24, 2014 02:25 AM
Dancingdaddy wrote:

It's interesting (and sexist) that when a man writes about this, you claim he's a troll.

From searching the forum, I found out I am not the only person to ask a similar question. But I am the only person to ask why the boys aren't made to as well.


I don't care if you are a man, woman, little kid or grandparent, your initial post was worded strangely. You care, but then you don't care as long as she wins and is happy? That was the gist of it. If you worded your post more clearly without questionable parental judgement included we would not be thinking troll. Maybe you were just trying to fit in with what you thought might be a pack of women telling you it was just fine for girls to wear grown up clothes and do sexy moves.

You are not the only person who sees a double standard for boys and girls in our highly sexualized society. Just go to a toy store and it is quite obvious.

Go with what you think is right.
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls?
By Dancingdaddy Comments: 6, member since Sun Nov 02, 2014
On Mon Nov 24, 2014 03:01 PM
Christine wrote:



Wait.... she isn't even in a school yet! YOU are the adult here. (or a troll... not sure yet) If she had a boyfriend who was a heroin dealer and she really enjoyed him would you allow it for fear of upsetting her? Please...

Keep On Dancing*


Heroin dealing is the same as dance? Wow, learn something new every day!
re: Why skimpy costumes on girls? (karma: 1)
By ChristinePremium member Comments: 6815, member since Wed Feb 04, 2009
On Mon Nov 24, 2014 06:17 PM
Dancingdaddy wrote:

Christine wrote:



Wait.... she isn't even in a school yet! YOU are the adult here. (or a troll... not sure yet) If she had a boyfriend who was a heroin dealer and she really enjoyed him would you allow it for fear of upsetting her? Please...

Keep On Dancing*


Heroin dealing is the same as dance? Wow, learn something new every day!


I hope that isn't what you took from that sentence. Let me dumb it down for you.

It is a parent's moral obligation to teach their children self respect, as well as the difference between right and wrong. It is a parent's moral obligation to guide their child's character development in such a way that when discerning between right and wrong their character is strong enough to choose the right.

To suggest that it is ok to let a child dictate questionable moral choices because they are "enjoyable" is neglecting your obligation as a parent. Children need boundaries. They need guidelines that have more substance than "whatever it takes to win" and the other disturbing POV concerning creeps leering at a young daughter so long as they don't touch.

This isn't about dance or about heroin dealing and I suspect the troll call was correct as I'm sure no one else had a problem understanding the analogy and I do not believe a loving father would ever write some of the things you have.

Again... how old is your daughter?

Keep On Dancing*
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