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Recitals & Performing
Director is being a jerk. I think.
By NYSalsera Comments: 9, member since Tue Jan 06, 2015
On Thu Mar 12, 2015 09:55 AM

I am feeling very betrayed...mad..sad...and starting to get unmotivated to stay with my company. I have been with the same dance company for over three years. I was in line to go on an international trip that was given to me two months ago, and then the director tells my partner (not even me) that the promoter for the gig dropped a couple and he chose to drop us. Fine. As if that didn't suck enough, I just found out a few days before the trip that a girl who just joined our company 2 months ago was given this trip, and my director never told me a thing! I am fuming mad that this seems to have been done behind my back, with no justification, and no real reason. Obviously I was good enough two months ago when he arranged for my travel with the promoter, so why the snub? How do you just give somebody a gig and then take it away? Me and this girl are at the same skill level, and I have paid my dues, been loyal to the company, and have helped out extra when asked with other things. I feel like my loyalty and hard work mean nothing, and I don't know what's happening. How can I discuss this with my Director? I think it was very wrong and unprofessional. He's also not giving me corrections or anything in company rehearsals so if there's something I'm doing that doesn't look good, I don't know. My partner also told me that he saw the Director making faces when I would do things, if I messed up a little for example, but then he never makes faces when the other girls make mistakes. I don't get it, I could really use an outsider's perspective here. Thanks!

5 Replies to Director is being a jerk. I think.

re: Director is being a jerk. I think.
By Nyssasisticmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 3643, member since Sat Sep 20, 2003
On Thu Mar 12, 2015 02:13 PM
Have YOU spoken face-to-face with the director about this? That's where you need to start.
re: Director is being a jerk. I think.
By NYSalsera Comments: 9, member since Tue Jan 06, 2015
On Thu Mar 12, 2015 03:18 PM
I have an appt. On Monday to speaj with him. I just want to express my feelings and state my case without seeming whiney or emotional or like I'm complaining.
re: Director is being a jerk. I think.
By AlwaysOnStagePremium member Comments: 7417, member since Sun Apr 18, 2004
On Fri Mar 13, 2015 09:47 PM
I would avoid feelings to start--your feelings are valid, but not the point of a business relationship which this company ultimately is. I would start by asking that you have a dialogue about your position in the company. You can mention that you were surprised that (new person) is going on the trip instead of you, and ask about what you could do to be selected in the future. Talk positive about yourself--that you are excited to move your career up a level and want to know his thoughts on how to get there.

If you focus on feeling betrayed, mad, sad, snubbed, wronged, and on the wrong end of a biased and unprofessional decision, it may further any negative feelings he is harboring and it will drive your own mood down into the ground. Keep in mind that this decision was his to make, regardless of if you think you deserved it. If your goal is to start the trek for higher status in your company, then you have to start from the moment you see him Monday. Behave like the person you'd root for in a movie (kind, humble, hard working, honest, focused).

Chin up -- Monday can be a good step for you to figure out what your next plan of attack is for your career. Let us know how it goes!
re: Director is being a jerk. I think.
By NYSalsera Comments: 9, member since Tue Jan 06, 2015
On Sat Mar 14, 2015 11:31 AM
That's great advice, thank you so much! I will focus on the positive like you suggested. It's just weird to me that he already booked me for the gig, and without saying anything he put her in last minute. I took off days from work and everything. ..anyway, I will let you know what happens, thanks again for the help!
re: Director is being a jerk. I think.
By dancin_til_death Comments: 4381, member since Sat May 08, 2004
On Tue Mar 17, 2015 03:15 PM
This meeting may have already occurred however just wanted to say that it was 100% odd. Being cut perhaps was not as odd as the fact that he didn't even have the time to tell you personally. You were owed that at the very least.

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