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VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread..... (karma: 9)
By tumblebugPremium member
On Mon Jun 07, 2004 11:34 AM
Made sticky by MIClogger (28613) on 2004-06-07 12:13:45

Ok. Teaching is stressful, and that's an understatement. We all have days where we just want to vent,vent,vent!!! Well, here is the place to do it.

Things I wish Parents New about my program (I coach All Star Cheerleading. I am an employee, not owner or director.)

#1. I am a coach, not a chauffer. My pay does not include taxi service.
Explaination; I pickup/drop up a few girls that are on my way to and from the gym. This is totally not a problem at all for me. --but-- The other parents don't understand why I can't cart their kids around too. Well, let's see, I have a Neon which is incredibly small. Their kids don't live anywhere near me and I would have to drive 30 miles out of my way to pick them up which also means I would have to leave early and pay for extra time for a baby sitter for my daughter. I can explain this to them until I am blue in the face and they just don't get it.
#2. It is not my responsibility to pay tuition for your child. If you need assistance, there are fundraisers available and scholarship programs.
Explaination; None of the parents are interested in doing a booster club for fundraisers. They want me to take my time (outside of work that i do not get paid for and yet again have to pay a baby sitter for) to organize fundraisers. They do not wish to help with fundraisers in any way, shape, or form. They expect me to organize the fundraiser and bring in the profits with no involvement from them. Sorry, but it doesn't work that way.
#3. Mandatory practice means coming to every practice, not occasionally.
Explaination; They expect to learn skills and choreography by occasionally coming to practice. Then they expect the girls to go out there and get first place every time eventhough half of them don't have a clue what they are doing because they never come to practice.
#4. Directions from,, triple a, are not alway accurate.
Explaination; I print off directions to each and every competition from a few different websites. We then compare them to a map and decide which route looks correct or closest to correct. This is the only way we have of getting directions to the competition site. Oh, and no I will not drive to each site the weekend before to make sure the directions are correct. Are they crazy?
#5. When at competitions, I am on my own time. I do not get paid to be there and I do not get paid to do the following; babysit your children, provide tours, provide food/drinks, and be your b**ch.
Explaination;enough said above.
#6. I am not responsible for your gas to get to competitions, admissions to watch your child, and hotel rooms if neccessary.
Explaination; It's bad enough that coaches have to pay their own gas, admission, and hotel expense out of their own pocket and I'm not paying anyone elses.
#7. I understand and support that the organization I work for is non profit and provides many services at no charge.
Explaination; I am an employee and I am not required to use money out of my pocket for work. It is a job and my purpose there is to get paid, not pay to work there. I do not have to provide any services for free or pay for anyone else's services for their child.
#8. Parents meetings are for you to receive information about your child's class, not a social hour.
Explaination; I have a hard time talking above everyone else talking because most of the parents know each other. Then when one of them does get upset about something, they all gang up on me.
#9. Your suggestions and concerns are important to me, but I can only do so much.
Explaination; I can't possibly make every single person happy and grant everyone their wishes. I do my best.
#10. I WILL NOT be taken advantage of this year and I will put my foot down.
Explaintion; I am tired of being taken advantage of and being walked all over. It will not happen this year. The show is ran by me, not you. If you don't like it--LEAVE.

There, I'm done. And I have to say I feel better.
Thank you.

788 Replies to VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....

re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By lollyhudson
On Mon Jun 07, 2004 02:13 PM
Hi! This is a really good sticky. I will let off steam when I have more time. Its great to have a page where you can vent frustrations. :)

preech on sista (karma: 1)
By divadivadancer
On Tue Jun 08, 2004 10:29 AM
I TOTALLY agree with you. Although I do not teach a cheerleadin team. I own a dance studio with my best friend, and we teach all the classes, plus have to run a business...

My thoughts.... Although I am young (23) and have been teaching for a while, I have learned a lot and have a lot of thoughts.

1. Class time starts at 5:00 not 5:15 or 5:03, but 5:00 on the dot!!!! How hard is it to get a child to something that YOU (parent) pay for? If I had to pay for something I would sure as hell make sure my child was there on time and ready to go.

2. I'm sorry did you say you want your child to compete but you dont want them to come to pracitce more then 1 night a week for more then an hour? What part of COMPETITION dont you understand?? How can your child compete and stand a chance against girls/boys that practice 3 or more nights a week for 2 or more hours a night???? Yet you can devote them to softball/soccer all summer and still wonder why they are getting no where with there dancing?? I cant possible teach them anything worth while in an hour once a week. HELLO school sports practice more then that!!!! Look around!

3. Sometimes I just dont feel like teaching. Its called FUN DAY! Get a grip! You (parent) have a cow if we have a fun day, but you dont want them to come more then once a week. Its not like fun day doesnt consit of dancing and learning skills. Its just a different approach to it. A lazy way shall I say.

4. (this is sorta a vent on my partner) How can the studio make money and gain more students if you are not willing to help?? All it takes is to answer the phone, reply to messages, or even put forth a little more effort when it comes to keeping the studio clean and neat for everyone. I am not your mother. Put forth the effort and you will see that one day you wont have to work 2 jobs.
Explantion: her thought is that the studio will never make enough money for both of us to only work 1 job and depend on the studio as our main source of income. So therefore she puts no effort into advertising or answering messages or communicating with the parents to keep them informed. Yet she wonders why the studio is not taking off like she hoped. EFFORT!!!

5. Class fess are not that costly! Call around to other studios and see what they offer. I only get paid $100/month no matter how much you (parent) pay us for class fess. We need to much stuff to help your child succedd and I am willing to fork over part of my pay for your child to have these tools. So dont B**CH about class fees being to HIGH!!

I could go on and on.. but I have vented enough. Makes me feel a little better. I just wish the parents understood more of what we go through.

Thanks a million for this thread!!

re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By idancemember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Tue Jun 08, 2004 12:32 PM
Ditto to all Sarah said! Especially about attending class! And I'll add...Let me teach it without parents making comments from the side to their kids. about a student that asks why your not doing the exercise with them. Nevermind that you just taught a class before theirs and have a Pilates class right after. : ) okay...done for now
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread..... (karma: 2)
By misschristie
On Tue Jun 08, 2004 03:01 PM
Oh, boy, here I go:

1. Please DO NOT send your child to class wearing jeans, and then get mad at ME when I make them sit out! And please try to understand that dress code is for every class, not just when it's convenient for you.

2. Please do not ask me to rearrange schedules or move Recital & picture days, to suit your schedule & plans. I cannot make everyone happy, and I have lots of factors to consider when making these choices.

3. Please do not leave your non-dancing children at the studio during class so you can run errands or shop. I am a dance teacher NOT a babysitter

4. Please don't barge into class to speak to me, I AM WORKING! Please call ahead to make an appointment.

5. Please do not expect me to be understanding if your child misses class to see the hairdresser or go to a birthday party. And dont even THINK about asking for a refund in those instances.

6. If your child decides to quit dance, please let me know, I am not psychic. If you're worried I'll get mad, you should see me when you DON'T call!

7. Please pay your bills. On time. Please. I don't want to have to send Bruno, the Knee-cap specialist, to pay you a visit. Because that's what I feel like doing to parents who blow off my bills and give me lame excuses.

8. Don't be a pushy stage parent. It's unbecoming.

9. Don't complain about my prices. I am not ripping you off.

10. If you really don't like the way I do things, you're free to go somewhere else and see if they'll put up with you.

Wow, that sure makes a person feel better!
Re:VENT!!! The teacher's venting thread.....
By missdancediva
On Tue Jun 08, 2004 07:18 PM
This is such an excellent venting thread. Every year (September) when dance classes start we explain the rules of dance class, the dance attire that dancers need to be dressed in, attendance,
important dates, and so on. The majority of the dancers and parents do not follow these rules and it is so annoying.

I mean how hard is it to call and say that you will not be able to make it to dance class.

It's not that expensive to purchase a black leotard, tights, and
a pair of dance shoes.

Don't walk into dance class late and start socializing with your friends.

When you are a dance teacher it is your responsibility to teach the dance class; not your assistant dance teacher's. The assistant dance teacher is suppose to assist with the dance class.

Parents who want their way or no way.

I totally understand what we are all saying and I totally think that we all wish that everyone would follow the rules and listen.

Love, Peace, and Pointe Those Toes,
~Charlotte L. Hlavac~
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread..... (karma: 1)
By tumblebugPremium member
On Tue Jun 08, 2004 09:13 PM
I have so many parents who want it their way or no way. I feel like a broken record constantly saying "well i can't please everyone". It gets so old. Why don't they understand? This ain't Burger King--You can't have it your way!!!
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By divadivadancer
On Wed Jun 09, 2004 08:28 AM
Removed by balletgurl (11968) on 2005-08-11 20:46:37 netspeak
I agree with Miss Christie... # 6 and # 10 are tops on my list..

If u quit, pick up the phone and call. It saves a lot of time and effort on our part. I would be much happier if you would just call and say hey were not coming back. I'm not gonna 20 ? u as to why ur quitting.

If you think I'm such a horrible person, or my studio is ripping you off, or ur child doesnt get the attention they deserve, or they in trouble more then any kid... by ALL means go to the other studio down the street. Let them put up with ur sorry a**!! U will be doing me a favor leaving.

And how can they complain about dance clothes and supplies costing so much and not buy their child 1 single dance outfit, but when it comes to school sports they are all for forking over the $$ to them no matter the cost. Did you ever think that ur child might like dance more if they looked like the rest of the class and didnt stick out like a sore thumb!! Thats why they like school sports cause they match the rest of the team.


Ahhhhhhh I feel better today. I'm glad to see that others have the same problems as me and feel the same. Some days I just wanna tell them all to take my place for a week and see how easy it is.

Thanks a billion,
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By tumblebugPremium member
On Wed Jun 09, 2004 07:30 PM
I have a good vent, or maybe that would be a praise?!?!
Anyway, my parents meeting tonight went well. I put my foot down and I think it worked.
Let's see how it goes from now on......
Re: Vent!!! The teacher's venting thread....
By missdancediva
On Wed Jun 09, 2004 07:39 PM
Dear Tumblebug,
I am really happy for you. I guess every now and then we need to put our foot down.

Love, Peace, and Pointe Those Toes,
Charlotte L. Hlavac
VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By moabcricketmember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 08:41 AM
Edited by moabcricket (92487) on 2004-06-10 08:43:52
Edited by moabcricket (92487) on 2004-06-10 08:47:15 Couldn't vent enough!~
Age. Favorites. GRRRRR.....
Who's the better choregrapher......
Who's putting in the REAL time.....
Who's there....
You picked her because she is your friend.....
The kids (and the parents) hate her....
She thinks she knows everything, and is in the directors back pocket.......
You allowed so and so on the team......
Her technique is bad and she is on your team....

A better dancer is over looked to do choregraphy work because she isn't your friend or running in your circle, or might be your best competiton....

A better dancer is cramed in the back of the group because the choregrapher wants her friends to have the lime light......
The choregrapher what's the lime light herself, and worries another dancer will over shadow her....

Livid! Teenage Nightmare!

Just shut up - and dance~!
Learn to share the spot light!

Oh...that was great! I wanta do that one again.

TEAM MOM . . .
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread..... (karma: 1)
By danzfanatik
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 09:34 AM
Okay, here I go!!

* I run a business- not a daycare. If your child is not interested in dance, do not send them to me.

* Do not answer your cell phone during parent observation day and talk loudly thinking I can't hear you over the music. The dancers can't answer cell phones in class and neither can you.

* When I say no, I mean no! It's my studio, my policies, my choice!

* Do not correct your dancer during class. I'm the teacher, that's my job- besides, you don't know how I want the step to look, you didn't choreograph it!

* When I say I won't order your childs costume without payment first, I mean it. Don't assume I'm bluffing!

* No matter what you think- your child does not deserve to be front and center through the whole dance, especially since she/he never comes to class!!


* Do not stare at me with a blank look on your face when I say 5678. That's your cue to dance!

* Just because you're on the back row doesn't mean that I don't see you just standing there and not dancing.

* I don't care that you just came from soccor. Jersey's and soccor shorts are not acceptable for ballet.

* I don't care how short your hair is, find a way to pull it back.

* When I say to go across the floor every set of eight I should haven't to count for you! Just go!

* Rules are for everyone!!

Oh boy! That felt great! I wish I could send this out on my newsletter. I don't think that would go over well though! ha ha
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By tumblebugPremium member
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 09:46 AM
* Do not stare at me with a blank look on your face when I say 5678. That's your cue to dance!

OH I loved that one!!!!
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By divadivadancer
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 09:51 AM
I totally agree... That was the best. I get that look often.

Vent!!! The teacher's venting thread.......
By missdancediva
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 10:30 AM
I totally argree that I liked that one too. I like when my dancers look at me because I know that their attention is on dance class. There are times when all the dancers want to do is chat with each other.

This is dance class not social hour!

Love, Peace, and Pointe Those Toes,
Charlotte L. Hlavac
Costume venting!
By danceallday
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 03:43 PM
Ok, here are my problems about parents, students and costumes

-If I say you need to cut the string, don't tie it, CUT IT!
-Nobody understands that we are suppposed to all look identical. When I say pink lipstick, NO NAILPOLISH! Don't come in with black nail polish and brown lipstick
-Parents #1 saying: Well is this going to be added to the charge? IF IT'S GOING TO BE ADDED TO THE CHARGE I WILL TELL YOU.

PHEW! That felt good.
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By lollyhudson
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 03:54 PM
Edited by lollyhudson (84029) on 2004-06-10 15:56:50
Well I said I'd let off steam when i had time, so here I am.

And here goes.

I have had enough of people coming into my class and act as if they don't know their left from their right.

I have had enough of putting a lot of time and effort in only to find the effort is wasted.

I have had enough of trying instruct students who, for whatever reason, don't listen and end up getting it wrong.

I have had enough of latecomers. Being 5 minutes into the class and some students just stroll in and casually get them themselves organised and I have to go over from scratch what Ive shown the others. It drives me mad!!

I have had enough of the TAKE.......TAKE......TAKE attitude. They think that all costumes come out of thin air.

I have had enough of parents who put so much into' their little darlings' with brand new shoes, salon hairstyles, make-up and new clothes and the 'my daughter is better than your daughter attitude' Thats not being realistic and not fair to the children and others. And when things don't go their way(the parents that is) they through a bigger strop than the child.

Thats it for now

Thanks again for the sticky :)

re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By imadanseurPremium member
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 05:41 PM
Oh boy...why didn't we have this thread sooner?? We all need it.

I am sick and tired of parents bringing their children 15-30 minutes late for class with NO tights and poking their head in the door saying it's their fault Susie has no tights because they were in the wash. (notice this is the parent that will be the first to bitch if I start class 5 minutes late!)

I realize parents have paid for shoes, tights, costumes, recital shirts, recital tapes, flowers, and tuition...but YES you still have to pay for admission to the facility that we rent. Tuition helps pay the teachers, costume money helps cover us in the summer when enrollment is low, recital flower money goes to our Booster club, nobody is forcing you to buy videos, pictures or recital shirts, so realize we don't have money sitting around to run a free show!!

I realize every parent thinks their child is the best one in the class, but if I say she isn't ready for level 2 don't bring her to the level 2 class when the new session starts. If I don't realize you've snuck her into the wrong class the teacher will be put in a bad position, the class will be too hard, your child will be frustrated, and she'll be crying after class. I will still tell you she CAN'T be in the class and I don't care if that time isn't convenient. I want kids to enjoy dancing, not hate coming and end up quitting because they are the worst one in class.

I know it's amazing, but I am human and I can make mistakes in billing, ordering costumes, etc. Just ask me nicely and we'll figure out any situations with billing, sizing, etc.

Oh...I feel better. I want to hang these vents up at the studio to give some parents a different perspective! The ones who need the attitude adjustment never think they are the ones in the wrong, so it wouldn't do any good!
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By Goldfingers_Girl
On Thu Jun 10, 2004 11:54 PM
Good Idea for a sticky!

Here are just a few of my many pet peeves for parents and students:

*Don't sit in the change room and chat than stroll into dance class late.....than complain that you missed something I already went over.

*Come to Class on a regular basis.....if you try that you may just improve....than you can stop saying "I can't do that"

*If you don't attend class on a regular basis, please come to class on important days such as a week or two before recital, dress rehearsal ect.

*Don't wear jeans or other clothes you can't move in.....thats why we have a dress code.

*Pay attention...yes, its that simple!

*Please, please read the notes that I give you....than you won't have to interrupt my class and ask me 20 questions.

*Which brings me to my next point....don't interrupt my class period!

*Don't tell me how to teach....or choreograph....or choose costumes....or handle other parents....ect ect ect

*Don't ask me questions that I don't know (I'm only one teacher at the studio and I don't own the studio!) I don't know why your bill is wrong or why Miss *so and so* wants you to come to class early next Tuesday!

*Please don't yell....I keep should you....schedule troubles, costume mishaps and classroom difficulties don't get solved by going nuts on me.

Hey thanks for letting me vent
Goldfinger's Girl
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By Miss_D
On Fri Jun 11, 2004 11:37 PM
This is fun. I hope a few parents read this.

* I don't care if grandma gave her a tiara and you went and got her hair done special (and not how I asked) at the salon, I need your daughters hair in a bun for the show.

* I'm sorry there was "traffic" and your daughter was late for class because of it, but the rest of us got here on time including me.

* No I will not "watch" your child because you have errands to do. I came early to work, not just in case you needed a sitter.

To dancers:

* Seriously, why on earth do you still dance with gum in your mouth? You know it's not ok.

* Folding your dance pants down does not make you look like Britney Spears and I can see your butt crack when you bend down.

* Show up for class each week, try hard, and be on time and maybe you will get that special part!

* I'm asking you to practice because I think you need to. Why would I lie?
Vent!!! The teacher's venting thread.......
By missdancediva
On Sat Jun 12, 2004 08:58 AM
The gum chewing in dance class totally annoys me. I mean am I the only one that knows that it is totally dangerous to chew gum and dance. That is the 1st I check on before starting my dance class. During my dance teacher training my dance teacher slipped
a piece a gum into her mouth ahead to see if I noticed and I did.
I said before we start our dance class can you spit that gum out into the garbage can, thank you. I always can tell when someone is chewing gum. Especially in dance class and it's totally annoying.

Love, Peace, and Pointe Those Toes,
~Charlotte L. Hlavac~
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By imadanseurPremium member
On Sat Jun 12, 2004 11:50 PM
I forgot one of my BIGGEST pet peeves...Tap class requires tap shoes. I know it is surpring to many of my students but you may not tap in your socks, bare feet, tennis shoes or flip-flops (one girl actually thought I would let her tap in them yesterday), you all have a dance bag, how can you possibly forget your shoes??? I really don't understand how you can forget your shoes when that is your ONLY class for the entire do you get into the car to go to tap class with no tap shoes?? I just don't get it!
re: VENT!!!The teacher's venting thread.....
By tumblebugPremium member
On Sun Jun 13, 2004 04:14 AM
Ah. The dreaded no tap shoes. I forgot about that one. I don't understand that one either. I also have girls where flip flops to cheerleading. Do you know how hard it is to hold girls up in stunts with flip flops? Impossible and dangerous.

New Vent!!!
I work for a non profit organization (think i stated that above), anyway, I had to talk to one of the parents over the phone who couldn't make it to the meeting. (this is the group thats wants everything for free by the way) I was explaining to her that each parent needed to sign up to organize one fundraiser per year since no one had interest in a booster club. Guess what she said??? "Oh, so now all the parents have to do the work now. Can't you do anything?"

I think I've just about had it.
Vent!!! The teacher's venting thread.......
By missdancediva
On Sun Jun 13, 2004 05:14 PM
That totally annoys me. They always expect to have their cake and eat it too.

Love, Peace, and Pointe Those Toes,
~Charlotte L. Hlavac~
By am5678
On Sun Jun 13, 2004 06:50 PM
OK, all the above I can definitely relate to. This vent is for the senior competition team:

1) Since when did they all of a sudden become experts on choreography. "This dance is too easy" "The other teacher's dance was more challenging"....well if it is easy why are you not all together and falling out of that triple where your arms raise up and down"

2) I know this is the age when boys come into the picture, but you are in dance class and not waiting for your new boyfriend, so stop checking out you hair, makeup and body in the mirror and instead look at your bad lines and technique on that last step.

3) Wow, I remember when you were all such sweet little if you don't look at me when I am speaking to you and stop rolling your eyes ...I will knock your head off your shoulders. WISH I COULD REALLY SAY THAT!!

4) When I say dance full out...don't ask, "does that mean you want attitude and smile too?" No, I don't...just dance like a dummy with a body attached.

5) I don't want to hear that Jane laughed when you fell on that step. And I don't want to know when this one said that and that one said this!!! You used to be best friends and besides you are not here to socialize, you are here to learn, so shut up and dance!!

6) When you are told to come to ballet class in a leotard and tights, don't try to sneak in with a tank top and shorts up your butt and then have the nerve to give me a dirty look when I tell you to sit out of class. You have known the rules for 12 years!

7) I am sick of the gossip and the students running home crying to mommy that they are not learning anything. If they closed their mouths they might learn something. Then I just love to have their moms march in and tell me their daughter said they were not being worked hard enough!! Why does my daughter come out of class without breaking a are not working them as they should be. Jeeze....maybe because your daughter walked through everything and I am tired of yelling at her to dance it!! Then, I tell these moms (mind you I have had these kids since they were babies and know their moms well) that their age is very difficult to teach and even though I love every one of them outside of class, they are really pushing me to the limit in class. They are teenagers, need I say more....although when I was a teenager, we would never be so disrepectful. We weren't angels, but not like kids are today. I explain this and I get.."Well, Jane never acted up before and she says she wasn't disrepectful to you". OKAY, I am making the whole thing up because with everything else I have to deal with, I really want to cause problems and blame Jane for something she didn't do...GIVE ME A BREAK!!!! No child is perfect. They all go through this period and your child is no different. Let's work on it together and nip it in the bud before it gets out of hand.

8) For our senior company they perform one jazz and tap dance all together for competition. Then the teachers choose about 6 for a more intricate dance for competition. Well, Suzie was always chosen for the jazz small group, why was she not chosen for the tap. Fair question!! The teacher nicely tells the mom that her daughter hasn't been working as hard as she could in technique class and is not getting the steps that will eventually go into the tap routine. She even tells the mom that if Suzie works hard in the next month she might still have a chance since that is when she will be starting the new routine.
OK, 4 weeks go by and the routine is started, but Suzie still does not get chosen. Teacher says, she hasn't worked any harder and on top of that, can't even remember her tap solo from week to week. MOM is MAD!! Daughter stops working all together!! Great!!

9) Jazz Teacher cleaning the routines 2 weeks before competition. Goes over every 8 counts and corrects over and over. I am in the other room doing the same with my younger group and they are working hard. After my class ends I stop in to see how the seniors are coming along. Funny, the dance looks the same. No improvement!! Try explaining to the girls that they are older and should not have to be spoon fed every little correction. A big part of their trainig at this stage is for them to pick up much quicker and watch the teacher from head to toe and make their own corrections without making the teacher say it over and over again. Example I give them: If you go to an audition, do you think the choreographer is going to mark every 8 counts over and over until you get it....NO!!! They don't have time. They want dancers who pick up quickly and make corrections by watching!!!

I have had these kids for so long that I feel like they are my own. I want what is best for them and I want respect from them and their parents....oh, and one more thing: if the parents trusted my studio to train their children for the last 12 years, why are they now questioning every thing my staff and I do?? As my mom used to say when I got in are guilty until proven innocent! I could see if the parents did not know me and might be a little leary, but I've taught their kids for years.

What gets me the most is the day of their first competition when they come up to me and say, Wow, that number was awesome!!! Gee, I know I told you those costumes were ugly when they tried them on, but they looked beautiful on stage and the judges loved that number!!

I give up and I'm done!!!
Sorry, so long, but I needed that!!
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