Forum: General / Jazz / Jazz - Professionals

team arrguments! how do i help?
By STARSdaNcer
On Thu Dec 30, 2004 11:09 PM

Hi everyone! I have these Two girls on Sr.COmpany this year that i am currently dancing with! they are Both Awesome dancers and amazing girls! I love both of them but feel like i am being split two ways. They have always had issues being with eachother. One of them some times takes control of the class. Sometimes i support her because we are not being respectful to our teachers and class mates. But it has always bugged girl 2. Often i see her rolling her eyes at Girl 1 and just kind of giving bad looks once in a while. My dance teachers have sat the Two girls down quite some times now and they just still have this grudge against eachother. Girl 1 has also told me sometimes she dosnt know if she can take it anymore and has threatend to go to another studio if this continues. She is an Awesome dancer and we love her! Girl 2 has also been saying the same things! WHat SHould i do?? i would love any coments PLEaSE! Thanks for reading!

4 Replies to team arrguments! how do i help?

re: team arrguments! how do i help?
By kabdancer
On Fri Dec 31, 2004 10:52 AM
Well, I'm not sure what to say...maybe you can't help, maybe you don't have to. Girl 2 sounds like she's got her own attitude and respect problems. Maybe it's best if she does leave. Girl 1 sounds like she unfortunately is trying to do her best but is constantly being challanged in a negative way by Girl2 which is making her experience at her current school uncomfortable and unpleasant. That ruins the fun of dance.

It's not really your problem to deal with, although I understand and appreciate your desire to smooth things out for everyone, but sometimes you're better off staying out. I would continue showing girl 1 respect etc...and maybe girl2 will realize that she is getting nowhere with her present attitude and may change her tune.

SOmeitmes being a Great dancer isn't neccessarily enough and other great dancers will come along if girl 2 wants to go....let her go...doesn't sound like a big loss until she learns to deal with her insecurities and change her approach with people.

As for you, like I said I appreciate your concern and trying to do the best for your group, but the best thing you can probably do right now is just be the best dancer you can be...focus on yourself, don't take on their problems. Sometimes getting involved only blows up in your face. maybe you're underestimating yourself and you to are also a great dancer and you could fill the void that one of them may leave. If they can't get past their problems and improve - you can.

All the best...I know it's hard to deal with clashing personalities when you work so closely with a group of people. I probably didn't help you much but hopefully might have said something to think about.

Happy New Year

cheers
re: team arrguments! how do i help?
By STARSdaNcer
On Sun Jan 02, 2005 04:03 PM
WOW!! thank you soo much i never thought about taking there problems and building off of them to make me a better dancer! thank you soo much!
this is a LEARNING experience!
By Studio1
On Tue Jan 04, 2005 09:18 AM
"STAR"

I just want you to know that things WILL get better for those two. But aside that, I know that you are a good example for them in your relationships. They look at you and your close friend and see that two incredibly talented people CAN be friends. Pretty neat that you can be an example to someone older than you.

I would say the same thing - just LEARN from those two. You can never change how they are. You can just learn to ignore it, love them for who they are, and VOW to never become that way yourself. Don't let them effect you and your dancing, or their situation has become stronger than you - just recognize how destructive it is and let it be your motivation to always treat your teammates with 100% love and respect. That will take you farther than any dancing talent EVER could.

Lots of Love, BBH
re: team arrguments! how do i help?
By dancinstargirl17
On Wed Jan 05, 2005 07:26 PM
kinda sounds like my team! I know how you feel exactly! last year was really bad with this sort of thing and unfortunatly the biggest issue was bettween me and my old best friend....after things got better, then worse-way worse, things got better again....i didnt think they would just keep faith and maybe they will. these girls need to sit down and talk to eachother and tell one another exactly how they feel about eachother and what makes them so angry. Its a hard thing to do i admit but it has to be done if issues want to be resolved. but my advice to you is to stay out of the middle. thats the worse thing to do is be caught inbetween two friends. let them work things out by themself. good luck! :)

~Kristina~

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