Forum: Advice / GLBT PG-13

GLBT FAQ (karma: 16)
By Liritmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sun Feb 27, 2005 05:07 PM

Okay, I've been working on this for a couple weeks now. I got stuck though because I couldn't think of any more questions. Feel free to add to it. :)

So what do the letters mean?

Simply put, GLBT stands for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgendered. Gay is generally used to refer to homosexual men, while lesbian is generally used to refer to homosexual women. Bisexuals are men and women who are equally attracted to people of both genders.

Transgendered takes a bit more explaining. A transgendered person is someone who was physically born as one gender, but for some reason, doesn't feel like they were put into the right body. Aurthefaery posted a much better and more detailed explanation. Go read it. . . . Or, you could try this article: . . .

Occassionally, you may see a Q attached at the end of those letters. This usually stands for Questioning. Questioning is fairly all encompassing and includes anyone who's curious or unsure about who or what they're attracted to. Questioning is something everyone can relate to, because everyone's been there. And it's an easier label to get cozy with when you're feeling pressured to slap a sticker on your forehead.

So, how do two women have sex, anyway?

As long as you're not hoping for a play by play of the details, you can find the answer you seek here: . . .
or . . .

If you're hoping for a detailed manual, I'm sorry to disappoint you, but you won't find that here. For one, this is a PG-13 site. For another, it's just something not very many people are comfortable answering.

How about two men, then?

In much the same manner as two women would, really. There are a few more obvious options, but just as with any two people, the obvious choices aren't the only ones.

Is being gay a choice, or is it something you're born? Can a straight person turn gay?

Matter of fact, the jury's out on whether being gay is genetic or a conscious choice. Some scientific studies have been done both disproving* and proving** that homosexuality is an inherited trait.

* . . .
** . . .

Thing is, though, you'll be hardpressed to find a member of the GLBT community who feels they had much choice in the matter. Make of that what you will.

I think I might be gay (lesbian/bisexual/etc)! How do I know?

The only person that can answer that question, is you. There's no set of guidelines, no rules written in stone that say "If you feel like this then you're definitely gay." Just like no two snowflakes are alike, there isn't a homosexual cookie cutter that you might have been cut out from.

The best way to figure it out is to give yourself time. And to experiment. Date a few girls and date a few guys. See what feels right to you. Don't worry about attaching a snap label to yourself, just BE YOURSELF. Catergorizing is so last millenium anyway. ;)

12 Replies to GLBT FAQ

re: GLBT FAQ (karma: 15)
By vandoraPremium member
On Sun Feb 27, 2005 05:22 PM
Edited by vandora (101603) on 2005-02-27 17:19:31
Edited by vandora (101603) on 2005-02-27 17:19:48
Edited by vandora (101603) on 2005-02-27 17:22:45
Edited by vandora (101603) on 2005-02-27 17:25:43
Edited by vandora (101603) on 2005-02-27 17:26:35
Edited by soliloquy (28370) on 2005-03-01 21:11:07 fixed a typo
I like/kissed a person of the same sex! Does this make me gay?

No. Actions do not make a person a sexuality. It is who you are attracted to that defines what sexuality classification you fit into, not your sexual acts.

I had a dream about sex with a person of my gender. Could I be gay?

See above. Also, dreams usually have hidden meanings, and don't seem to mean the obvious.

I've had fantasies about the same sex. Am I gay?

Not if you're not attracted to the same sex. It's perfectly normal and natural to have fantasies about anything. Just because you might think about it, doesn't mean you'll act on it. A book I have states, "There's no such thing as a wrong or bad fantasy." But no, simply thinking about being with someone of the same sex doesn't make you gay.

Why do people feel the need to "Come out"? Isn't that just shoving it in people's faces?

It's a big part of the identity development for some in the GLBT community. These people don't feel the need to pretend to be what they aren't, and they're not afraid of people knowing. The choice to come out is a personal thing. Some people never do, others couldn't imagine not coming out. It's not shoving it in people's faces... In fact, some people come out because they don't want assumed heterosexuality shoved in their faces anymore.

How many gay people are out there, anyway?

It's a hard number to come up with, but the Kinsey Institute suggested that approximately 10% of the population is lesbian or gay.

Are all lesbians "man haters" or are all gay men "women haters"?

No! There's nothing to hate about the opposite gender. Choosing to love the same sex doesn't automatically mean you must hate the opposite gender, any more then being heterosexual means you hate your own gender.

What about gays having children? Won't their children be gay?

Research has shown that kids of gay parents are no more likely to become gay or lesbian than children of heterosexual parents. A huge percent of lesbian, gay and bisexual people have heterosexual parents. Gays, lesbians, and bisexuals are just as competent as parents as heterosexuals. Your sexuality doesn't have much bearing on your ability to raise children.
Why does the GLBT community want special rights?

To have special rights, we must first have equal rights. Gay rights is about having the same civil rights consistent with the beliefs that all people are entitled to such necessities as employment, housing and business services without fear or discrimination. Many people wrongly assume that gay rights is solely about marriage. It isn't.
By crunchyPremium member
On Tue Mar 01, 2005 08:25 PM
Very cool post. Thanks you two!
By DejaDerangemember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Thu Mar 03, 2005 09:31 PM
Have I told you two today that I LOVE YOU??? You're the best. We needed one of these. Mwah!

By pinkdancebabemember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Tue Mar 15, 2005 04:18 PM
Thank you so much for this post! I am personally not any of the things that you described, I'm a straight women, but have many gay/lesbian/trangendered (ok not so many trangendered) friends and they are all FANTASTIC people who I love to to death! But I also have straight friends who are very close minded to homosexuality because they don't know anything about it. We're actually have a discussion about homosexuality in religion class (I go to a Catholic School) and I'm going to use some of your resources to help explain these things to them.
Again thanks so much!
By Sparkz_NzPremium member
On Sun Mar 20, 2005 06:21 PM
and remember resource links for everyone can be found in here

and here:

Our lovely sticky which died due to noone replying for 2 months :(
By NeoSoulchildmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Tue Mar 29, 2005 12:56 AM
Edited by tooty1981 (117377) on 2005-03-29 00:49:07 had to make some corrections and add a couple of things...
Thank you so much for this post Soliloquy and Vandora. I hope alot of heterosexuals with those questions read this because if I had a penny for how many times people asked me those questions, I would be as rich as P Diddy! lol. I got into a heated conversation with a straight man and woman (Friends of mine. maybe I should find new friends huh?), and they kept saying how gays and lesbians shoudn't shove their sexuality in everyone's faces. They also argued with me about how gays shouldn't have "special rights" as well, and I had quite a time getting through to them. I told them that men throw their sexuality in my face every day by coming up to me disrespectfully and grabbing my butt, and that some women put it out there sometimes when they're at a bar or party, getting drunk and making out with every guy there (trust me, I've seen it all).

This is a good post and it really tackled some questions that needed to be answered. Love you guys!
By dancing_fitnessmember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Wed Mar 30, 2005 03:21 AM
Hey I'm new to dance net,

I am a straight male ballet dancer, not a fetishist but definitely happy when wearing feminie clothes, which is one reason I got into ballet, and now I am hooked.

Thanks for that list of descriptions, and this messsage board, so much information especially on the links to brouse through, it will take me ages.

I think it is great that there is so much useful information which would hopefully encourage more understanding.

re: GLBT FAQ (karma: 1)
By Liritmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Mon Jun 20, 2005 04:23 PM
Hey guys, don't forget about this, mmkay? Seems a lot of folks aren't reading it and asking a lot of the questions already covered.

That's why it's called an FAQ.
By mynameisxena
On Tue Aug 16, 2005 10:20 AM
Very good post, and incredibly thought out. I'm sure that it'll clear up a lot of misconceptions some folks may have. Good on ya! :)
By chloe_boemember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Thu Sep 01, 2005 03:36 AM
cool, i always wondered what this board was and now i have looked and i understand! thanks for the great post it helped me alot!

chloe boe xxxx
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Wed Oct 12, 2005 03:04 PM
I pretty much knew all this information before, but those links have some really interesting information!

Why don't people read stickies though?
re: glbt faq
By JoeAngeLove
On Mon Apr 26, 2010 06:34 PM
love being out and proud, have been now since i was 16!


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