Good post. I just read a post recently where someone asked for advice concerning a pregnancy issue and when posters gave advice and showed concern, she got majorly upset. What gives? I'm rating you up for this one.

~Brandy

Exactly. I was sure that I was not the only person who noticed this type of thing going on, so I figured I'd bring it to everyone's attention.

peace out
sh'naynay

Amen Shnaynay!!!

*Offers a cake with karma and extra frosting on top*

I'm so glad you thought to make this post. AND you have a new sticky.

I've seen loads of people posting their problems, then getting angry at the advice given. It drives me nuts. Thanks again for making this.

-Ash

Yes Shnaynay... I too concur with your post/sticky.

I would like to add that in giving advice- we should all give the best advice; best informed, most sympathetic (give it straight, yes... but do not intentionally 'hurt' someone) and that we shouldn't argue with each other within someone else's post.
No one should post based on rhumour or folklore- I can't stand reading 'advice' that comes straight from urban legend! Be sure you have done your research... or at least be open to havig someone correct you-- as has happened to me but in reverse. I gave advice from fact and knowledge, to try to correct a previous posters rhumour advice- and was immedaitely followed by someone else saying "I've heard that that can happen too... I disagree with Venicia"... so, if you are at a computer- do a little search about the topic prior to replying based on what you heard or what your cousin's friend's auntie's hairdresser told her....
Guess I'm ranting too... but when I read a young girl's question about something personal, and she is confused and not knowing... I hate thinking that she is getting advice from someone who is basing their reply on made up goop.
Be factual... do research, be absolutely sure...if you don't have an answer- do not reply.

And yes, take the advice or leave it- but don't argue when someone has the courage to give it to you like it is...
CHeers and thank Shnaynay- Karma!

YOU GO GIRL! Karma on its way!

This follows along with my other pet peeve...when people lock perfectly good threads because "they aren't happy with the replies they are getting". Duh! Thank you mods for unlocking such threads!

Thanks for posting - it drives me insane the amount of arguments people have about outdated posts. Karma for you I might just add that, the advise most give on DDN is amazing and has really helped me through some of my toughest times

I agree Shnaynay.

But let's not forget that sometimes what's really further explaining the situation so people don't get the wrong idea isn't always arguing with the advice people are giving. Because sometimes I know I've tried to further explain myself and people see it that way. As arguing with their advice I mean.

^^ You're right. If you need to clarify something, and it's going to alter the kind of advice that you're asking for, go right ahead.

What I was refering to in this post was when people ask for advice, and when they don't get the answer that they want, or if someone disagrees with them, they argue about it, and refuse to even listen to the other person. Why bother asking? You clearly have your mind made up, so don't waste our time.

But, clarification is, of course, perfectly fine.

peace out
sh'naynay

I feel kind of bad. My last thread was because I care about my friend. I feel like I've done something wrong now.

It's great to give and get advice and all, but how about making sure you don't bash the person you're giving advice to and making that person feel like an idiot.
There's a difference between being honest and just being mean.
Jen

^^ That's true. I'm not saying that it's alright for people to attack those who are asking for advice. I'm saying, don't ask for advice if you don't want it. If someone gives you some good, solid, helpful advice, and you don't want to hear it, don't post your question here to begin with - or, if your post is outdated, and you don't want anymore replies, LOCK IT.

peace out
sh'naynay

Shany i totally agree, i just want to say that sometimes, even when yo know what you hhave to do... doing it isn't so easy

Heck. Yes.

You know what else I hate? Is when people tell their story and ask for advice- then ARGUE with you when you give your opinion.

Girl: I have this boyfriend who cheats on me and treats me badly. ButI love him, what do I do?"

Us: Dump him, he's a jerk. You shouldn't be with a guy who treats you like crap and cheats on you.

Girl: You don't know him- he's really cute and I love him. He's not always mean to me. And once he bought me flowers and besides- Prom is next month.

Us: Does it matter that he's not ALWAYs a jerk?! A jerk is a jerk period. Dump him. Just because he gave you flowers doesn't mean he's worth being a boyfriend. And you can find another prom date- one that treats you well. You don't deserve to be treated like that.

Girl: Whatever! I don't know why I asked. Forget it- you don't understand and you're judging him and you don't even know him. *Locks post.*


Uuuuh- what the heck were you asking us for then....?

Awesome post! people get to upset and mad over some of our responces its like ugh why bother asking then.

thanks for saying this! a lot of times, i feel like people are just posting their situations (in other forums, not just the ones on DDN) to have other people say "yes, you're right", not for actual sympathy...so, of course, when people offer advice counter to their beliefs, they freak. they need to grow up a little - thanks for standing up and saying so!

advice regarding this post through dancingqueen12's eyes,
dont read it.. unless you want to start singing ironic & have it in your head for the rest of the day

justt kidding.
i hear yah shnay, hearing things straight up are the way it goes here on ddn, and personally .. i thank you for speaking out on this subject.

advice can be great if youre willing to accept it.
but then theres those people who can face being wrong, especially when the advice theyre getting disagrees with their main thoughts..

but seriously gracias on this on ..
stay rad.
dancingqueen12

"its like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife,
its like meeting the man of your dreams, then meeting his beautiful wife.. "

see, i told you..

im new on here but i totally agree, although i think maybe thats abit harsh. we all have times wen we dnt see sense and we need close mates or sum1 else 2 point us in the right direction. im sure the people concerned will read your post and be pointed in the right direction! great post tho x x x

im sure the people concerned will read your post and be pointed in the right direction!

Now THERE is something ironic. I'm sure that the people that this is directed towards will not read my post, and will not see reason from it.

I'm glad that those of you who have read it understand where I'm coming from, though!

peace out
sh'naynay

i agree, after all the point of posting under "advice" is to give and receive it.

thanks for posting!