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re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By bubbles23 Comments: 815, member since Sun Jul 17, 2005
On Fri Sep 07, 2007 09:07 PM
so my period is crazily irregular, and for no particular reason. ive had it for about 5 years and it was regular for about 2 years and now its irregular again. ive looked at all the reasons to why it is so irregular and non apply to me.

does this mean i have to go to the gynocologist? and will they have to give me a pelvic exam. blargg.

it looks really painful :(
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By joytothe_world Comments: 1053, member since Fri May 11, 2007
On Fri Sep 07, 2007 09:13 PM
^I would go just to check things out.

Yes, the should give you a pelvic exam, in my opinion.

And its not painful. :) Don't worry if you have to get one.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By maureensiobhan Comments: 4726, member since Wed Dec 24, 2003
On Sun Nov 04, 2007 09:29 AM
I had my first pelvic exam at age 21. At age 21, I saw an adult endocrinologist. (I started seeing a pediatric endocrinologist at age 14, by the way, thanks to my mom. She made sure of it that I saw this specialist, who, when I turned 21, referred me to an adult endocrinologist. So, in a roundabout way, I felt forced into having a pelvic exam. I felt that my mom would have made sure I went along with having one. so, like an obedient little puppy, I went along with it. I hated every minute of it. I felt that there was no real reason for me to have a pelvic exam, since I wasn't having any problems that warranted my having a pelvic exam or even seeing an endocrinologist. I have mosaic Turner Syndrome, a chromosome abnormality, which is not life-threatening. That, however, is another story.)
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By st_88_keys Comments: 27, member since Sun Nov 25, 2007
On Sun Dec 02, 2007 06:26 PM
Haha wow. My mom just walked into the room when I got to the diagrams. Awkward! This was a great post though. And I didn't know about the rectal exam. My gyn has never done it before.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By LadyNocturna Comments: 4, member since Thu Dec 13, 2007
On Thu Dec 13, 2007 12:48 PM
Wonderful! Simply wonderful info! I felt like I was really there. It really helped me to feel much more relaxed about my first time. Thank you so much! It was very much appreciated! :D
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By Dashuriamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 2041, member since Wed Mar 27, 2002
On Mon Dec 17, 2007 01:19 PM
Thank you so much for this post JoyNoelle. I heard all about pelvic exams from my mom and my best friend. But this was really good to read, very helpful.

I just went to my very first pelvic exam today. I'm 22 and not sexually active, but I decided to go just to get everything checked out, and also because I've been having irregular periods for waaaay to long. :P

The exam went really well. She did all the basic stuff, then checked my breasts, all good. I thought it would be awkward having someone exam all of my private areas that closely, but the doctor made me feel really relaxed and chatted with me. You can definitely tell that she's done this a million times. ;)

I have to admit that when she started going in for the pelvic exam it DID hurt. I cried. My hymen is still in tact and this was why. I was finally able to relax and she did everything she needed to do down there and I'm perfectly normal. :) I did not have to have a pap smear done as I'm not sexually active. Phew!

It was over quickly but I have to be honest and say that for me, this exam was very painful. :( I'm glad I don't have to do it again for another year! :D
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By greentutu2 Comments: 205, member since Fri Aug 26, 2005
On Wed Feb 27, 2008 12:16 PM
I just had a question: what is a BC? My gen doc said I don't need a pelvic exam until I'm 25 if I'm not sexually active.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By greentutu2 Comments: 205, member since Fri Aug 26, 2005
On Wed Feb 27, 2008 12:22 PM
I just had a question: what is a BC? My gen doc said I don't need a pelvic exam until I'm 25 if I'm not sexually active.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By JoyNoellePremium member Comments: 3864, member since Fri Feb 04, 2005
On Thu Feb 28, 2008 08:16 PM
greentutu, I'm not sure what you mean by "a BC." Is that something your doctor said, or that you heard somewhere else? Normally when someone says something about "BC" they're talking about birth control, and I'm GUESSING that that's what you're referring to, but if you can clarify a little that would help.

Also, I disagree with your doctor's belief that pelvic exams are unnecessary before 25 if you're not sexually active. By the time I was 21 I had become incapacitated by gynecological diseases that started in my pre-teen years, and had nothing to do with sexual activity, since I hadn't started having sex yet! It's unusual for someone that young to have something seriously wrong of a gynecological nature, but it does happen--it certainly did for me, and I had to have my reproductive organs removed at 22. By having pelvic exams, a doctor MAY be able to diagnose certain problems early on when they're still treatable/curable. Just a thought.

Dashuria, I'm sorry your exam was painful. I'm guessing that you were very tense and that combined with an intact hymen made it difficult. But it sounds like your doctor was really good and that things worked out okay. When you go next year, just remember to really relax your abdominal and pelvic muscles, and take some long, slow deep breaths as she's inserting the speculum. That should help!
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By Scarlett_ Comments: 30, member since Wed Sep 18, 2002
On Wed Apr 30, 2008 10:58 PM
Okay, i finally went and only because I didn't have a choice and have been having bladder problems. All I can say is that was THE most humiliating, emmbarassing, vulnerable, gross thing I've ever gone through. Not to mention you leak lubricant for like thirty min. afterward. I still feel gross and violated. Nothing agaisnt the doc. he was really nice and professional, but no one could make that pleasant for me. And to make it worse, I have to go back and get a hoo hoo ultrasound done. I'm already dreading it. Since when did it take like three + people to take care of ONE hoo hoo!? Good luck getting me to go back on a yearly basis. I'm sorry If everyone thinks I'm overreacting because "eveyone" HAS to get it done, but it was as bad as I thought it would be, it was like an alien probe session without the aliens. ICKKKK
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By Kekoamember has saluted, click to view salute photos Comments: 8949, member since Sat Jul 19, 2003
On Wed Apr 30, 2008 11:14 PM
^Wow, I sincerely hope you grow up and learn to be responsible about your health. A girl I know went in for her first pap at 19 and had cervical cancer while exhibiting NO noticable signs. Your health is not something to gamble with, I think it's worth being "violated" to make sure you don't die of some preventable pelvic condition.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By Scarlett_ Comments: 30, member since Wed Sep 18, 2002
On Fri May 02, 2008 12:49 AM
I don't really care what you think and telling someone to "grow up" isn't exactly mature ;) A) I have a VERY healthy family history, B) I've only been intamate with ONE person, C) I WENT to get it over with just to make sure because I am a RESPONSIBLE adult. I have a home, a husband, job, bills, taxes and everything that goes with them. And if I have a problem with someone sticking foreign objects up my vajayjay that is MY problem and my responsibily, so don't worry about mine. People have phobias about "stupid" things, like heights, spiders, dentists, etc. me I'd rather have a root canal that go to the gyno, you might freak out in the dentist's chair or whatever. So don't go telling people they need to grow up just because you can't see past the end of your nose.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By JoyNoellePremium member Comments: 3864, member since Fri Feb 04, 2005
On Sat May 03, 2008 12:29 AM
Scarlett_ wrote:

All I can say is that was THE most humiliating, emmbarassing, vulnerable, gross thing I've ever gone through.
Just wait till you go through childbirth! :O You'll be poked, prodded, and have things shoved up your vagina a million times before the baby finally comes out--and that'll involve NUMEROUS people being in the room.

Seriously, though, I'm sorry it was unpleasant for you but as I said in my OP it can make you feel very vulnerable...I mean, really, how can lying on an exam table with your legs wide open and someone sitting/standing RIGHT THERE looking at your privates...in bright fluorescent lighting, no less--NOT make you feel vulnerable?! But you're going to have to get past the feelings of humiliation/embarrassment for a number of reasons. For one thing, your very health--including your ability to procreate--may depend on having regular exams. For another--and this is something REALLY helpful to remind yourself when you're in the exam room--the doctor has done this and seen this a ZILLION times before! You don't have anything she or he hasn't seen and examined a plethora of times before. I know that for you as an individual it *IS* a big deal, but for *THEM* it is not. So when you're having your vaginal ultrasound done and/or if you have another pelvic exam soon, consciously remind yourself that this is what they do thousands of times a year and to them it's just another day at the office.
I still feel gross and violated.
Why? Again, keeping in mind that your private parts are NOT A BIG DEAL to the doctor and their staff, and that they're simply doing their job by examining you, what's gross about that? And why do you feel violated? (No offense, but as someone who has been raped, I KNOW what real violation is...and I assure you, a professionally conducted pelvic exam doesn't qualify.) Some of us who have sexual abuse and/or rape in our backgrounds *DO* have a sense of feeling violated when examined--especially if the doctor is male--so it's certainly not unheard of, but [I hope and pray that] if you have no such history...you really shouldn't feel that way. I know I keep repeating myself, but it REALLY is just another day at the office for the medical professionals.
Nothing agaisnt the doc. he was really nice and professional, but no one could make that pleasant for me.
Perhaps you'd do better with a female doctor. Personally, I only see female doctors for stuff like this, although I used to see males. (Long story.)
And to make it worse, I have to go back and get a hoo hoo ultrasound done.
That's vaginal ultrasound. ;)
I'm already dreading it.
Remember to relax and to consciously remind yourself that this is a professional procedure being done because it's important for your health.
Since when did it take like three + people to take care of ONE hoo hoo!?
Like I said before, just wait until you go through labor and delivery!
Good luck getting me to go back on a yearly basis. I'm sorry If everyone thinks I'm overreacting because "eveyone" HAS to get it done, but it was as bad as I thought it would be, it was like an alien probe session without the aliens. ICKKKK
You owe it to yourself to make sure you do go back on a yearly basis. Your health is worth it, isn't it? :)
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By SLBdancermember has saluted, click to view salute photos Comments: 2129, member since Sat Jul 20, 2002
On Sat May 03, 2008 07:25 AM
JoyNoelle made some really good points. However, I do understand that everyone has a different "definition" of feeling violated, so while many people think of rape as being violated, others feel that just having someone see their body in a way that is uncomfortable is being violated.

To the OP, you may say you are grown up, but if you are not mature enough to say vagina, then I've got to wonder...

I will admit, I haven't gone yet, I go for my first exam on May 22, and yeah, I'm nervous but it's not the end of the world. I have a medical phobia too (doctors, dentists, etc) and i take a very low dose of Xanax prior to appointments (along with talking about my fears in counseling) and then I hardly even remember going. I am taking my best friend with me to the appointment also because she's had exams before and she is going to keep me company and help me stay relaxed. Maybe see if you can get a low dose xanax to take the morning of your appointment? Or try some counseling and talk about your feelings as well as learn relaxation techniques.

I'll update you all on how my exam goes later this month as well.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By Scarlett_ Comments: 30, member since Wed Sep 18, 2002
On Sun May 04, 2008 06:23 PM
JoyNoelle,

Thank you for being mature and understanding in your response. I am very sorry you were raped. I know that it isn't a big deal for he doc and he doesn't bother me at all, I really liked him. He was/is my mothers doc and that is why I went to him. My mom had some serious complications with her last pregnancy and he handled them professionaly and very kindly. He is a very nice man. If I had gone to someone I had neve met I probably would've been in tears the whole time. I don't care that he is a male,either way it woul've been the same experience for me.

SLBdancer said pretty much what I meant by violated. To me, that is how I feel/felt.... ha,and the funny part is that you to pay them to do these things to you.

I obviously know I'll be in that position much more during pregnancy and labor. I don't have as much as a problem with that because someone else's life depends upon it and my phobias etc. will take a back seat not to mention during labor I'll be in far too much pain to honestly care what is or isn't being done downstairs.

Yes, I get to have a vaginal ultrasound. No, I'm not looking forward to it, but I know I need to get it for certain reasons which happen to be my own buisness.

Oh yeah,

"To the OP, you may say you are grown up, but if you are not mature enough to say vagina, then I've got to wonder..."

There is nothing wrong with saying ( or typing) the word vagina. Likewise there is nothing wrong with calling it a hoohoo, vajayjay or any ofthe numderous synonyms ;) It is like saying the word pee instead of the word urinate. It doesn't have anything to do with maturity and I suggest everyone re-evalute what they base their ideas of what makes one mature or immature on... especially when I doubt any of us have met one another in person. Seriously,take one anothers feelings into consideration. Because one may have a hard time coping with something and someone may not have a hard time at all has nothing to do with being "grown up" girls. Now, if you go in spite of it, then you are being responsible. I could say that if you have to take a medication just to get to any doc than that is weak and immature.. BUT IT ISN'T! And we shouldn't judge someone because they may have to take those steps there. Honestly, I don't come to dance.net often because it is so filled with such negativity and sometimes prejudice towards eachothers members, which is pointless because we all have a lot of the same things in common!!!

That having been said, it is and will be hard for me to go back, but I will because I need to. It will bother me probably just as much as it did the first time! But being a grown woman, I can so "Oh Well". So, I have a problem going to the gyno, but I have no probs going to the dentist, hospital,no prob with needles or blood. You may. I have seen babies born into this world, and unfortuanately born out of in a horrible manner wth many many complications.I have witnessed a family member take her last breath. BUT, that doesn't make me any better than any of you and likesise it doesn't make you any better than me because you have no problem layin' spread eagle at the gyno's and I do in spite of the other things I can handle. It doesn't matter. So, please ladies, don't ridicule eachother for being different. It's not worth it doesn't get anyone anywhere!

Now, I will tell you how my next appt. goes, but I expect the same respect as I give you all. This time Hubby is coming along :D

And goog luck SLBdancer ;)
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By SLBdancermember has saluted, click to view salute photos Comments: 2129, member since Sat Jul 20, 2002
On Thu May 22, 2008 10:28 AM
So my appointment was this morning. Turns out the doctor I went to refused to do an exam on me because I'm not 21 yet and not sexually active, even though I requested it since that is what i had planned on being there for. She was extremely rude and therefore I'm kind of happy she didn't do the exam, because I'm sure it would have been extremely traumatizing the way she was acting. Not only that, but she threw 2 boxes of birth control to me without explaining it, left the room, and then proceeded to make fun of me to a nurse (while i was within 5 or so feet, i could def hear her) for asking for an exam even though "i dont need one"

I'm sorry but if I'm almost 21 (in 4 months) and YOU told me to come back to have an exam in the summer, and I even ASK for the exam, but you refuse, there is something really wrong with that!

Def not going back to her, going to find another doctor. A friend came with me to this and witnessed it and agreed that it was horribly rude and disrespectful and told me about her doctor and gave me her number so maybe i'll try her next.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By JoyNoellePremium member Comments: 3864, member since Fri Feb 04, 2005
On Fri May 23, 2008 06:13 PM
That's awful, SLB. She may be the doctor, but YOU'RE the "customer" and it's your right to get what you went there for AND to be treated respectfully. Aside from the fact that she was rude, she was also WRONG. As I've said a zillion times, there are many things that a female can have wrong with her reproductive organs--even at 21--that have NOTHING to do with being sexually active. *I* speak from personal experience on that! Please keep that in mind the next time you have a discussion about the need (or lack thereof) for a pelvic exam with a doctor. My symptoms first appeared when I was 12--and I had never even SEEN a penis, let alone had anything to do with one. :O 21? I was on the verge of a hysterectomy at 21...and it was because of the NON-sexually acquired illness that started at 12.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By SLBdancermember has saluted, click to view salute photos Comments: 2129, member since Sat Jul 20, 2002
On Fri May 23, 2008 11:24 PM
Thanks JoyNoelle. I was actually thinking of you because I've read your story on here multiple times and it sticks in my mind. I can't begin to tell you how incredibly rude she was, but I can tell you that I for sure will not be going back to her. I was absolutely apalled at her behavior especially her being a professional and me being a nursing student and knowing just how inappropriate she was.

I worry sometimes because no doctor has been in that area of my body since i was maybe 10, so who knows whats going on with it. Last year when I had a CT scan of my pelvic area related to something totally different, they found an ovarian cyst, not something to worry about since it was the kind that takes care of itself during a period, but still, it was a surprise to hear that. Also, since I told her i have extremely bad cramps aside from PMDD, you would think she'd want to do an exam to make sure there isn't something physically wrong causing it...but no, according to her, I don't need an exam and it was "funny" that i asked for one.

I am also definately not taking the birth control she handed me without talking to a doctor that takes the time to talk to me and I know that it would be the right choice. My university nurse has recommended someone who is a DO instead of an MD and it sounds like other students at my school have really liked her, so I'm probably going to give her a call next week and make an appointment to go in and just meet her and talk to her and if I like her, set up an appointment for an exam. My friend also recommended her doctor but its pretty far away, however, its another option of someone good.

Sorry for the long vent, I needed to get it out haha. Yesterday was just not pleasant...the way she treated me made me feel much more violated and traumatized than a pelvic exam ever would have!
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By Kekoamember has saluted, click to view salute photos Comments: 8949, member since Sat Jul 19, 2003
On Mon Jun 02, 2008 10:32 PM
I just don't understand why everyone reads this and freaks out. If anything, reading about the gyno before my first time made me feel very comfortable and confident, since I knew what they'd be doing. I know everyone's different, but I promise you, it's absolutely no big deal and knowing what they'll do is better than not knowing.
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By SLBdancermember has saluted, click to view salute photos Comments: 2129, member since Sat Jul 20, 2002
On Wed Jun 11, 2008 06:07 PM
Edited by SLBdancer (33542) on 2008-06-11 18:50:16 Forgot a few things
Hey everyone,

Here's an update. I got some recommendations for a different obgyn after my last experience. (read above if you don't know what I'm referring to) I went to my appointment today (first exam!) and this doctor was AMAZING!! She spent about an hour with me, talking with me first in her office, while fully clothed, getting a full history and discussing the issues I wanted to discuss. After that, we went back to the exam room, she let me get changed into the paper gown, and then she came back in and did the exam. She was extremely gentle and talked me through it. She did a pelvic exam and a pap smear. I hardly felt anything! It only lasted like 2 minutes, so it wasn't bad at all, and I didn't feel exposed at all either, she kept me covered as much as possible. Then she let me get dressed and talked to me more and let me ask questions and that was pretty much it, not bad at all! She was great and I definately plan to go back to her. :)
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By Dancing_EMTmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 3466, member since Wed Dec 08, 2004
On Thu Jun 12, 2008 04:23 PM
Thats good that you got another doctor. I hated my first OB/GYN. Rushed me through my appointments, told me everything looked fine when I told her some issues I was having (didn't give me anything to try, nothing), stuff like that. Then I got a new doctor recommended to me by a couple girls I worked with and she was awesome. She spent extra time with me, chatted to me about things other than my girly parts, told me everything looked OK but also gave me some things to try and if they didn't work to give her a call back and they'd get me in to see what they could do. She's really good. A couple of my friends go to her and also really like her. :)
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By jenna_dance Comments: 777, member since Thu Sep 20, 2007
On Thu Jun 12, 2008 05:11 PM
Going for my first one in a few weeks...

Do they do the bum thing in Britain? I've never heard of the bum thing. I don't understand why either, I was of the impression that the doctor is only taking a smear of cervical cells to look for mutations that may be pre-cancerous or cancerous.... because cervical cancer can be treated very successfully if treated quickly.

Maybe the key difference is we're talking about different exams here? Am I thinkin Cervical Smear and you guys are all talking "Pelvic Exam" as in bums, genevas, and everything in between?
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By JoyNoellePremium member Comments: 3864, member since Fri Feb 04, 2005
On Fri Jun 13, 2008 01:41 PM
SLB, I'm really glad to hear you're with a new gynecologist who you really like. That makes such a difference. :)

jenna_dance wrote:

Do they do the bum thing in Britain? I've never heard of the bum thing. I don't understand why either, I was of the impression that the doctor is only taking a smear of cervical cells to look for mutations that may be pre-cancerous or cancerous.... because cervical cancer can be treated very successfully if treated quickly.

Maybe the key difference is we're talking about different exams here? Am I thinkin Cervical Smear and you guys are all talking "Pelvic Exam" as in bums, genevas, and everything in between?
It can be a little confusing, but generally when a woman has a "pelvic exam" they're really having all their female parts examined, and this includes a Pap smear. As for the rectal exam...as far as I know, rectal cancer and other things that can be diagnosed or clarified by doing a rectal exam [and this includes gyn issues] are not limited by geography. :P
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By mindyyy33 Comments: 37, member since Wed May 14, 2008
On Thu Jun 26, 2008 07:37 AM
I just had to get this done (I'm 15) for birth control. I went to planned parenthood because I dident want my mom to know. It dident hurt one bit and the doctor (it was a girl) made me feel really comfortable. The only problem is she said that there was somthing wrong with my right ovary and that it felt like swollen or something. So now I have to go back in a week and if it is still swollen I have to tell my mom everything and then I have to get and alutrasound. Im sooooo scared!
re: What to expect at your first pelvic exam
By Terpsi Comments: 2045, member since Tue Oct 04, 2005
On Sat Jul 05, 2008 03:58 PM
Edited by Terpsi (142506) on 2008-07-05 16:00:07
Sorbet wrote:

the doctor was asking me all these questions like "Have you had sex" and "have you ever made out?"


This is from a very long time ago (and sorry to bring it up after so long) but what on Earth does making out have to do with a pelvic exam?

And like many other people on here, this thread made me cringe and shed a few tears. But it was very helpful! Thanks!

Ashley
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