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Baby On Board
Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing. (karma: 3)
By hylndlasmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 7170, member since Wed Sep 22, 2004
On Mon Mar 12, 2007 09:04 AM
Made sticky by hylndlas (107168) on 2007-03-12 09:05:03 Because sometimes a wee reminder isn't always a bad thing to have.
Edited by hylndlas (107168) on 2007-03-12 09:23:14 typo's and wanted to ass a few more points
Edited by hylndlas (107168) on 2007-03-12 09:24:15 ^ Should be ADD ....DOH!
Edited by hylndlas (107168) on 2007-03-12 16:20:52 added more

I've seen a growing number of posts here (really anywhere on DDN) where an DDN member will post something (Isn't a b or c nice) and someone will come along and respectfully-sometimes not disagree with with the OP's feelings on a matter.And other member's will chime in and tell the disagree(or/ee's) that "this is not the debate forum!" or something along the lines of discouraging someone for daring to disagree with the flow of the post.


Let me make one thing clear....There is a difference between being a bonifided troll that's causing trouble and just the average joe disagreeing with another poster.


I'd really like to know why some of our member base feels it's not ok for someone to have a difference of opinion and that doing so will turn a thread into a debate.

Guys... The first rule for any civilized discussion is to realize that people can legitimately have differences of opinion!


This is not a bad thing!


If everyone believed that things should ALWAYS be sunshine and rainbows these boards/life in general would be really boring.

I feel REALLY strongly on this because during my time in the Army I saw what censorship/ not having freedom of speech does to people while stationed in Korea. IT OPPRESSES THEM! North Korea if some of you don't know is famous for not allowing people to speak out....doing so can and will get you killed! Grant it this is cozy little DDN land....but because of my experiences in life and the things I've seen I firmly advocate the right for anyone to have free speech!

That being said....I don't always agree with what someone has to say whether it be here on DDN or face to face. I'll admit that BUT I am the first to defend someone's right to say it.


The point I'm attempting to make here is that not everyone will agree with you.....and just because they don't DOES NOT AUTOMATICALLY turn a thread into a debate.

Think of it this way...
A debate is a formal method of interactive and position representational argument. A disagreement is a conflict of people's opinions or actions or characters.


A difference of opinion IS NOT A horrible thing to have. In fact I encourage it!


Now if you see a thread where another member is blatantly flaming another member and/ or is clearly breaking the Terms of Agreement please hit the mod button.


-Maggie

(Speaking as a concerned member)

8 Replies to Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing.

re: Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing. (karma: 7)
By Jeannie1member has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 4325, member since Sat Mar 11, 2006
On Mon Mar 12, 2007 10:00 PM
Thanks for your sticky. I think it's wonderful that you took the time out to write this.

While it is true that people are allowed to have a difference of opinion, and are allowed to speak their minds, some people do it in a disrespectful way.

It's one thing to say, "Well, I see where you are coming from but...." and state your opinion in a way that isn't rude

But when someone says something along the lines of, "What's wrong with you people for thinking this way" or something like, "What's the point of you making this thread?" and acting like their opinion is the only one that matters or acting like the thread that someone took the time to write, because they wanted to share something with the DDN population, was stupid or pointless is just rude. It's rude to bad mouth someone for posting a thread about something they wanted to share, even if you disagree with it. Don't you agree?

The point is, there is a difference between an awesome discussion with well thought out responses, and a discussion with people being rude and saying uneccessary things.

Just my opinion ;)
re: Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing.
By Queen_Jojo Comments: 4947, member since Sat Aug 27, 2005
On Tue Mar 13, 2007 08:13 AM
Sometimes some of us (me included) type their replies without properly reading their reply. We all have different opinions but I think maybe we could possibly word things better!
For myself personally I have tried to put my opinion accross but made a total mess of it and it looks like I'm trying to say my opinion is right and no one else's matters! It's not intentional, I'm a nice person really.
As for debating - I don't like arguing with people but feel very strongly on certain subjects and do get upset and angry when someone is rude towards other, especially children.
I'm glad this has been made a sticky. When we log on we can see it and remember some very good advice!
Thank you

Queen_Jojo
re: Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing.
By hylndlasmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 7170, member since Wed Sep 22, 2004
On Tue Mar 13, 2007 08:21 AM
^ And I'll agree with that. Hence the reason I said
Let me make one thing clear....There is a difference between being a bonifided troll that's causing trouble and just the average joe disagreeing with another poster.


HOWEVER....there have been cases lately NOT just on the baby boards but also on other boards (the 20's board comes to mind) where a poster will tell everyone AFTER they see that people don't agree with them "this is not the debate board".

It's cases like that that bother me.

Just because someone disagrees with you does not make their point any more invalid than yours.
re: Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing. (karma: 1)
By Jeannie1member has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 4325, member since Sat Mar 11, 2006
On Wed Mar 14, 2007 12:21 AM
While it's true that just because someone disagrees doesn't make their opinion less valid that yours, it's true that there is a nice way to state an opinion and a rude way to state it.

And while I agree that sometimes things we say are taken the completely wrong way, there are some people on the board that are just not nice in the way they respond, and mean exactly what they say (tone and all!), and I think we all know that.

I know it annoys you when people say, "This isn't a debate" but you have to realize that some people make a thread into a debate, rather than a discussion. When you are having a discussion, it's just a totally different vibe than a debate. Debates can get very heated (people think their opinion is right and everyone else is wrong, and we see that A LOT on these boards, if you ask me!).

The truth is, they are saying "This isn't a debate" to try to get the thread back on topic and to try to get the posters to stop being so harsh towards each other for no reason.

Like I said before, some people are just down right RUDE towards others for no reason what so ever. They give smart remarks for no reason, they give an attitude for no reason, other than the fact that they disagree with what was said and think it's "stupid" or "pointless" for the OP's to even say things.
re: Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing.
By hylndlasmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 7170, member since Wed Sep 22, 2004
On Wed Mar 14, 2007 01:34 PM
Edited by hylndlas (107168) on 2007-03-14 13:38:51 typo
I know it annoys you when people say, "This isn't a debate" but you have to realize that some people make a thread into a debate, rather than a discussion.


A debate according to the dictionary... is a formal method of interactive and position representational argument.

What you and other's are calling a debate isn't a debate...it's a disagreement which boils down to a difference of an opinion.

Not a debate....a disagreement.

They are too different things.


And once again....hit the mod button if you think a poster said to much.

re: Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing. (karma: 2)
By pelerrojamember has saluted, click to view salute photos Comments: 1125, member since Fri Mar 18, 2005
On Wed Mar 14, 2007 01:38 PM
Edited by pelerroja (125802) on 2007-03-14 13:42:46 added something
Not to be troublesome or anything, but I think this would be best placed on one of the General boards as it doesn't seem to be unique to the baby board.

I would have to agree with Jeanie though. All well and good if you disagree with someone but that's no excuse to be rude or sardonic. If you truly happen to believe someone's post is 'pointless' don't comment on it.
re: Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing. (karma: 1)
By Jeannie1member has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 4325, member since Sat Mar 11, 2006
On Wed Mar 14, 2007 01:54 PM
I know that debates and discussions are two different things. I know what a debate is, I know that its two, or more, people discussing their position on a particular topic. However, the reason I said that sometimes people make them into a debate is because I feel like that is what it becomes sometimes - not all the time. It becomes two or more people saying "I'm right, you're wrong." A debate still has a difference of opinion though, wouldn't you agree?

I don't care if someone agrees or disagrees with me, I would never push the mod button because of something so ridiculous as someone disagreeing with me.

The main point that I was trying to make is the fact that some people don't know how to even hold a civilized discussion on this board and are completely rude in the way they reply. I wasn't trying to make a point on "Discussion VS Debate" I was making a point that some people cause problems during dicussions, and that is why people tend to say "Let's not make this into a debate" - they're trying to just get the rude people to stop carrying on with the nonsense and get the thread back on track.
re: Debating vs Difference of opinion....not always a bad thing.
By Celebrianmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 7921, member since Thu Mar 31, 2005
On Tue Apr 24, 2007 09:52 PM
I'm curious. Is it against the rules of DDN for people to do name-calling? I see it from time to time (not often, thank goodness) and it really bothers me. Can you mod report for that?

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