one of the girls in the ballet class that i help teach tapped me on teh hand and said "i love you" it was so cute

Today out of nowhere one of my 5 year-olds who is super shy and never says a word blurts out: "When I was a baby I used to suck milk from my moms **** (student grabs her chest and starts shaking it so I will know what she is talking about) and it was soo tasty!"


Ok where in the world did that come from kid? LOL

I had a student tell me that her mom and dad got divorced, and her mom had to get a job, so now she works at HOOTERS and shows off her boobs...I was like, "Oh.....ummmm....that's nice!"

I've had kids answer balle ttheory questions funny. Like when asked "when you move your feet from one position to another, you must point the toes and arch the...?" the answer is instep, and one of them answers "achillies tendon!"

And then kids just going into random conversations with you in the middle of class and im just like "oh, thats nice... moving on..."

One of the girls in the Novice Company Baton Team said "That her Grandma has only one eye so she cut off one of her legs and then crowned her the Indian Princess"
wow she is the same kid who said that she has been waiting for 5 hours for class to start when it was only about 3 minutes

A local grade school was having a fine arts day and aksed me speak and demonstrate to the kindergarten classes. I had on a black leotard and skirt. At the end of the program one little girl said I looked like a witch (I'm hoping it was the outfit.) I asked her why I looked like a witch, I guess my face gave me away, because another little girl very sweetly added but your are a good witch.

My assistant and I were tying all of our 4 year old students tap shoes as we often do before class we were chitchatting. My assistant makes some comment about shaving her legs and then one of the students says my mommy shaves my daddy's back.

Same situation a few weeks later, we were tying shoes and asking everybody what they did on spring break. Same student says she went to the zoo, so we asked her what she saw there and she said the big elephant poops.

Mmmm! Lots to choose from - I think the best one was a little girl who told me that her mum wasn't picking her up after the lesson as she had just had a boob job!!!

In my three year old class a few years ago we were doing the butterfly stretch. The kids never want to go all the way over so I say to them sometimes,"go over and smell your feet." So they all go over and smell their feet and then they proceed to start telling me what their feet smell like. Some are saying my feet smell like: strawberries, gummlegum(bubblegum),stinky. Then one student that was just learning to speak english sits up and says,"my feet smell like CRAP!"

I thought I was going to die it was so funny. To hear that come out of a three year old was just like wow!!!

i_luff_to_dance wrote:

at a competition my student (age two) entered a ballet and jazz section. Se won her jazz and when they announced it she bowed and was just so adorable. she said thankyou miss bri for teaching me my dance. Then when she came third in ballet and didnt get a trophy she still bowed and said. i pointed my feet my hardest miss bri but you cant teach good ballet. i was so embarrased but for a two year old it was just gorgeous

That is too cute!

Once, I had a student tell me that she loved me all the way up to God.

Last year, my 4-5's danced to Let's Go Fly a Kite and each decorated a kite and used it for the show. I let each student describe what design they had put on their kite and one girl says about hers, which was mostly stick figures and flowers, "well, I can't really explain it... it's kind of like an hallucination." She's FOUR!

Also last year, in my 4-5 tap class, I had one student always refer to her new kitty cat webkin as her "pussy." It started when she came in and said for her birthday she got a new pussy cat webkin. The next week, she said she couldn't find her "pussy" because it was lost. The next week, she told me that mommy said she could get a new "pussy." As much as I would say kitty, she would still say the other word! We were pinching ourselves to keep from laughing!

On that note, my SO STILL reminds me and the parents of my students that when I was 4 (almost 20 years ago), I ran into the studio and announced to her that my mom had gotten her tubes tied! I guess you can say I've come full circle lol.

Sorry its so long but I couldn't leave any detail out

I was laughing out loud while reading all these stories...hilarious.

I've probably had a lot of weird things said to me, but the one I remember clearly is about one of my kindergarteners {who was one of my favorites}.
I don't know what her and the other girls were talking about but all of a sudden you hear the girl go very loudly "My grandmas on weight watchers". I'm trying not to laugh, and the head teacher scolds her telling her she dosen't talk about that in dance class.

It was so cute.

So I teach an all boy's group and one boy last week raised his hand, and said can I say something? I said of course what's up? He replied "I like Big Butts" me and mommy listened to that on the way to class.

You have a big butt, oh my I could not keep from falling on the floor and laughing. He was so serious too, and mom said "my bad" did not mean to get him hooked on the song.

One of the 6 year olds told me that stretching in 2nd position "makes her private parts hurt"...

I have had so many but I can't think of any really great ones right now. Last year I was talking to a four year old before class started. She started talking about dinosaurs and she claimed they became "stinked" in 1987. I told her that dinosaurs became extincted many years before 1987. I then said that I was born in 1987 and she kept asking if my mom was a dinosaur or if my friends were dinosaurs. I just could not convince her that they were extinct before then. After class she ran up to her mom saying I was born with the dinosaurs and how cool my life must be.

I usually wear my hair in a ponytail for class, one day I had looped up. Nothing that different or odd. This 6 year old walks into class and says "Miss___ what in the world are you doing with your hair?"

In a preschool class we were holding hands with a partner and doing a "dish rag" turn. After class I had a student announce to the lobby "Miss___ taught us how to do a "douche-bag"!" What! why does a 4-year old know that word!

I am getting married next month and my kids say the funniest things about it... the week after I told them I was engaged one 5 year-old girl asked "So, how's the marriage?"

Okay, just the other day I'm teaching my level 2 (Grade 2 Al Gilbert) Tap class and we are working on the kick ballchange exercise. I'm trying to get all the girlies to get up on the balls of their feet, but some of them are not getting the ballchange to go in the back yet, so I just ask for the regular 'kick ballchange' and hope I get the kick in the front and the BC in the back. I have one little lady, Kylie...and she does the entire exercise on the balls of her feet...perfection! So I say to her "Kylie!! What a good girl, you did that all on the balls of your feet and I didn't even ask for that yet" and she turns and says "I like balls!". I have a 16 yr old teaching asst. and I just put my hand up in her direction as if to say "Don't you DARE look at me right now!"
I told Kylie she was a good girl and I was happy she was working so hard....
I'm never going to see kick ballchange the same way again!
I love my job!!
Laura in Kamloops, BC Canada

I had just returned to teaching after I had my son about a month before.
Kid 1: Did it hurt when they cut him out?
Me: They did not cut me, I had him the other way.
Kid 1: What way?
Kid 2 (mom is an OB nurse): Oh Oh Oh I know (runs over an whispers in her ear)
Kid 1: YUCK- That is gross. I am never having a baby...

When I first starting teaching MANY years ago I was starting my pre-school jazz class and we began doing some floor stretches. As we sat on the floor in our middle splits and stretched foward a little girl yelled from the back, "WOW, Miss S your boobs are even bigger then my moms and hers are huge!" Same girl a few weeks later after parent visitation says my daddy likes coming and watching you dance with us, he said he really likes the way you jump" OH BOY! That was the last time I taught with out a T-Shirt on.

msconnie wrote:

I ran into one of my students at the grocery store. I was in my normal street clothes. The little girl looked at me and said "Ms Connie, I've never seen you with clothes on before". I assured her mom I didn't teach naked!!

I get that all that time... however I've never thought of assuring the parent that I don't teach naked! That's hilarious! I'm going to have to use that next time.

MissTalia wrote:

One of the 6 year olds told me that stretching in 2nd position "makes her private parts hurt"...

Ha! I have a new one, one of my four your olds while stretching in second repeatly told us "her nuts hurt", while pointing to that area. The other teacher looked at me and was like "WHAT DID SHE SAY?!", and I was like I'm not sure, and she said it again. So were like don't say that, and all the other kids were asking what did she say, and of course she decides to scream it out.

Oh goodness! Well here's mine for the week:
"The other day I was so mad at my brother that I flicked him with a pencil in his WIENER!" (emphasis hers not mine)

She's a second grader...and I'm still trying to figure out why she felt the need to share...

I have a little 3 year old boy this year- whenever he's tired he says his car is out of gas. So I've had to fill his car up with gas so he can continue.

Absolutley classic! I love all these stories : )

I have a few but this one always makes me feel good.

I was teaching kindy gym and one of the girls had gone to a relatives wedding the weekend before, which led to the question "Are you going to marry you boyfriend" To which I replied "I don't have a boyfriend yet, I should find someone nice shouldn't I"?
My only boy in the class came over, gabbed my hand and said "Don't worry I'll marry you!"
Awwww however also got the "Mrs Robinson" nickname for a few week from the parents too!!

Yesterday at my class for special needs teens we were repeating a sequence of rhythms. On the second-go-round I asked the students to close their eyes and then I mistakenly said "and don't listen to the music".(of course I meant to say 'and LISTEN to the music') One student piped up, "Are we supposed to close our ears too?"
It was very funny to all of my students that I had made such a silly mis-speak.
kinni