A few weeks ago my studio went to a competition. I had 2 routines, one of which did very well and received a high score first place trophy. The second group didn't do so well and they received an elite silver medal. Well, somehow, my 2nd group thought that they should be getting a trophy so they kind of badgered the people into giving them one, which they did. My director claimed that she tried to give the trophy back, but they told her that the kids can keep it. My co-worker and I expressed our feelings about the "fake" trophy and why we don't think its right to keep it, but she says that she doesn't want to hurt the kids, which I understand, but she told me NOT to tell them the truth. Well I did, and I told them that they just have to work a little harder next year, and they are fine with that, but since then, my director has put the "fake" trophy on display, paraded it around, and even announced it at the recital like these kids actually won it. I was soooooo upset. I have never questioned her morals before now, but I honestly can't get this out of my mind. This seems like a big lie. I even get a little nauseas every time I see it.

Am I making too much of a big deal out of this? How should I re-approach this concern of mine before the start of the next dance semester? I even considered leaving the studio because of this. I just think it looks bad and makes us look dishonest. We are not hard up for awards, as there are plenty, but this just seems to discredit all of the work I have done with these kids. Any suggestions?

I was at a competition a couple of weeks ago and there was a group that got a high silver and when I was at the "stuff" table after that awards ceremony, I saw a mom buying the girls a platinum trophy because that is what she really deserved. This is something I say when kids complain about what sticker they get...

You get what you get and you don't throw a fit!!!

As far as what you did, and what you should do...you did the right thing by talking to the kids, but there is nothing you can do about the SO. I don't know if I would say anything, just kind of file it in the back of your mind and pay attention if there is any more behavior of this kind. If there is, maybe that would be the time to mention it.

"elite silver medal"

What?! What the heck is that? Oxymoron anyone? Why don't they just call it... "You didnt place well, but we want to make sure you come back next year" Silver medal. Gimme a break.

Unfortunatly there isnt squat you can do... SO calls the shots.

Though I can't believe she would allow the kids to badger a comp to give them what they don't deserve...

Thats crap.

I don't think it is too much of a big deal. Some of the competitions we attend order a few extra trophies just in case any of the others are damaged when they are being transported to the competition which they have been before. So at the end of the day there are a few left over. The judges often choose to give out a few 'encouragment trophies' to kids who did not place. They might choose someone who came 4th in a really really big division so just missed out, or to that kid who always comes comp after comp and year after year and never wins, or to someone with special needs or to a new competitor. Its great often these kids would never have a chance of winning a trophy otherwise and they are very proud of it, where as the kids who win all the time would rarely appreciate it.

What does bother me is the idea that your students badgered the staff into giving them a trophy. This is really innapropriate behaviour and an issue that should have been addressed when it happened.

What pisses my students off is that these comps sale the same trophies at the comps. They feel like they just earned one the right way and now anybody can just go up to the table and buy one.

I would talk with the director, one on one, and talk with the students about what happened. I agree with tha above poster that their behavior in making the competition give them one was inappropriate, and even if the director "asked" to give it back she should have left it there. They didn't earn it and its not fair to give them one. The only time that ever happened to me was when they ran completely out of the trophies, and the competition just gave a larger one because it was there fault. Granted it was a high first place score but the trophy that was given was still larger than the ones the other students got. Anyway-I think that this should be addressed thoroughly, because not only is their behavior not appropriate, but they should not be "rewarded" for it.

Wow! As an SO I'd be furious to hear my students did something like this. I would have left the trophy and those students wouldn't be back on the team the next year. What is it teaching them?? Nothing. It's teaching them that they don't have to put in the same effort as the other kids if they just whine about it. I can't believe the competition company would give in.

I wish there were more 1st, 2nd, 3rd place competitions out there as it is. All of my students routines came back with the same color and size trophy this year even though some scored higher than others. I feel like it takes away from my students that really put their efforts in.

Sounds like you went to Showstopper (I bet). Some competitions, like USTD, let you only buy a trophy of the level you won. The sale has to be approved by the school director and they must have proof of their win (they will look it up).

I would never allow this and the parents would have gotten an earful from me, that's for sure.

I had one parent, who was not allowed to buy a "fake" trophy for her daughter. She went to Crown Trophy and ordered her own, had it printed with the name of the competition and everything. I found out because the little girl told her friends.

I let the parent have it and told her that she was skating on thin ice for dance team. Eventually the kid was tossed from the school, due to the mother and her shenanigans.

I called Crown Trophy (we have a local vendor) and told him that was a no-no and that if someone wants a trophy with a competition name on it, he needs to get permission from the comp. He agreed and never did that again. I have dealt with him for years.

What are these parents thinking? Give your kid something you did not earn? Why are parents like that? I don't recall this when I was competing. I remember the parents all telling us that they were proud but you can't always win. We learned to take defeat with grace, and if we didn't, you bet we would not compete again. My mother would have killed me if I whined about it.

ok, i think "badger" may have been the wrong word, although I was still upset with their behavior. This was their very first competition and I guess that since all of our other groups got trophies, they thought that they missed theirs or something. I was still upset; nonetheless, and I definitely spoke with them about that also at the next class meeting. Thank you all for your comments. They were extremely helpful, and I guess since the world isn't going to end because of it, I'm going to try to let it go, and hopefully it won't bother me as much in the future.

I agree. I grew up with the "you can't all be winners" and thats what I told my kids. Since they had never been before, I guess that since they knew that that they won that medal, they must have forgotten their trophy somehow. I was and still am fuming about it, though. Even in their regular class, when I hand out stuff, they don't all get it if they didn't do what was asked. This situation will definitely be brought up again as a "no no" for the future. I think they get the point now, though, because I gave them the longest lecture ever in the history of dance teacher lectures (in my classes... )

JLL wrote:

Sounds like you went to Showstopper (I bet). Some competitions, like USTD, let you only buy a trophy of the level you won. The sale has to be approved by the school director and they must have proof of their win (they will look it up).

I would never allow this and the parents would have gotten an earful from me, that's for sure.

I had one parent, who was not allowed to buy a "fake" trophy for her daughter. She went to Crown Trophy and ordered her own, had it printed with the name of the competition and everything. I found out because the little girl told her friends.

I let the parent have it and told her that she was skating on thin ice for dance team. Eventually the kid was tossed from the school, due to the mother and her shenanigans.

I called Crown Trophy (we have a local vendor) and told him that was a no-no and that if someone wants a trophy with a competition name on it, he needs to get permission from the comp. He agreed and never did that again. I have dealt with him for years.

What are these parents thinking? Give your kid something you did not earn? Why are parents like that? I don't recall this when I was competing. I remember the parents all telling us that they were proud but you can't always win. We learned to take defeat with grace, and if we didn't, you bet we would not compete again. My mother would have killed me if I whined about it.

I agree. I grew up with the "you can't all be winners" and thats what I told my kids. Since they had never been before, I guess that since they knew that that they won that medal, they must have forgotten their trophy somehow. I was and still am fuming about it, though. Even in their regular class, when I hand out stuff, they don't all get it if they didn't do what was asked. This situation will definitely be brought up again as a "no no" for the future. I think they get the point now, though, because I gave them the longest lecture ever in the history of dance teacher lectures (in my classes... )