Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By Adriana_Moon
On 06/18/2008 23:49:07
Ok, now that I'm 30 and childless and a Lesbian, I feel like the clock is ticking. I imagine I'm not alone in this, but how [i]do[/i] we breed?
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By KayElle
On 06/19/2008 15:12:27
Well, honey, when a man and a woman REALLY love each other, they get together in a special kind of hug... and nine months later, a baby is born! Did your school miss out on sex ed? If there are other gaps in your knowledge about human reproduction (for example, the reason why you've been bleeding approximately once a month for several years now - a fact which, if I were your age and wasn't aware of, I would be quite anxious about) then might I suggest the "What's Happening to my Body?" Book for Girls. It's great.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By Chaconne
On 06/19/2008 15:17:16
It can't be too hard, my daughter goes in tomorrow for a C-section for her 2nd...at age 41. Jon
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By KayElle
On 06/19/2008 16:54:02
^ Ooof, congratulations to your daughter! How come we haven't seen you 'round the Baby on Board boards? Do we get pictures? (sorry, irrelevant, delete me if necessary)
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By back2dance
On 06/19/2008 21:03:25
Your biological clock may be ticking, but you better make sure you won't be doing any drugs with that child around!
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By miraclefrmheavn
On 06/19/2008 22:49:09
Well this is an interesting post. Um well I will keep you in my prayers that you will find a solution to your question.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By divamom1
On 06/20/2008 09:26:14
Just by calling the incredible and delicate process known as parenting "breeding" infers that you have no idea what you are doing. I insist that you do not bring a child into the world, nor take the responsibility of any other child! Please reconsider this serious commitment. DM
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By dangslow
On 06/21/2008 10:51:02
I thought lesbians hatched from softballs?
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By back2dance
On 06/21/2008 16:58:07
...I'm confused by your nitial question. If you have a penis, shouldn't the answer be obvious?!
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 06/21/2008 17:18:26
Holy CRAP! I'm almost speechless. Is this a functional penis or a constructed penis? I'm riveted.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By smileywoman
On 06/21/2008 17:49:59
WOW! Adriana, you will shock a lot of DDNers with that bomb you just dropped revealing that you have a penis. If you have a penis, YOU could get a girl pregnant and have her carry the baby...Dear Lord, WHAT AM I SAYING? *head desk*

The biggest bomb on DDN has just been dropped. Adriana, I'm amazed that you so easily admitted that you are a trans sexual. I had to give you karma for that revelation because it's not easy being that truthful in our society without backlash. I think that is quite brave of you.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By Kekoa
On 06/21/2008 22:21:01
Easy. You don't.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 06/21/2008 23:02:00
1. Stop drugs 2. Start meds 3. Get job 4. Find girlfriend 5. Save money 6. Do sexytimes 7. Have baby
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By dangslow
On 06/21/2008 23:58:15
Maybe you could morph into an emo guy for a while. There are lots of girls who are into the emo guys that wear makeup and hip huggers. Once you find a girl who is into you, then you can tell her the rest. I imagine the relationship will have to progress to a very good level of trust before you tell her, but if the girl can handle that bomb going off in her face then certainly she would be able to handle motherhood.
Definitely stay off the drugs though. You need every bit of mental ability to handle kids. If you dont have a headache by lunchtime, then there's something that you are missing, you know?

After you have a girl, then you just have to hit it. You know, sic the ol hose hound on her. Saddle up the baloney pony. *wink* *wink* Beat her with the ol beefstick. Spank her with the timbercrank. Treat her to a symphony from Mr Ledwang. Shoot er in the face with your Mr Cheney. *wink* *wink*
Bend her over and make her feel dirty.
If you have a penis, there is NO reason she shouldn't be crying in the shower at 2am.

Once you have kids, just trade in your fishnets and high heels for a pair of sensible flats and forget everything that ever happened to you. Just focus on the new little tricycle motors you have running around and concentrate on making their lives the best they can be.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 06/22/2008 12:44:44
Shoot er in the face with your Mr Cheney.
Ummm... It's been a long time since my last anatomy class, but I don't think shooting her in the face will make her pregnant. And I disagree about the fishnets and high heels. You can't wear sensible shoes if you want to be a MILF.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By dangslow
On 06/22/2008 14:25:32
^Who are YOU so wise in the ways of anatomy?
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By back2dance
On 06/22/2008 17:01:31
Good luck getting past step 2....and 3.....and 4.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 06/22/2008 17:02:06
You forgot to mention finding a job and getting treatment for your mental disorders.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By back2dance
On 06/22/2008 18:52:50
Wait, those are easier than bending the girl over and making her feel dirty? Oh oh.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By delinquent
On 06/25/2008 06:36:19
wow. this post, everyone's witty thoughts.... oh, the amusement. Oh the funny. - oh crap, I have to go teach. Well, thanks for what will most likely be the most amusing thing in my poor broke after college life. At least for this week. This is the funniest thing I've read, and definitely NOT what I was expecting when I opened the thread! merci.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 06/25/2008 21:48:59
I think someone needs to diagram this thread so we can figure out how it went from breeding to tranny lesbians to Bush & the secret service to wherever we are now. Adriana, how do you manage to twist every single thread into a paranoid political diatribe? Don't you have ANY other interests?
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 06/26/2008 14:50:13
This is not ANY sort of communication. I think it's more of an "episode". Or possibly an "attack". Or "seizure"?
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By delinquent
On 06/26/2008 20:19:11
^ Yeah, I have to say, it's not even entertaining anymore...
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By divamom1
On 06/27/2008 09:59:18
AM You say I insulted you and that was not my intention. Perhaps you were being humorous and I missed it, for that, I do apolegise. However, we have become a very humour-LESS society when children are concerned. Your initial post indicated in a rather common way you were interested in bringing a child into your life. Not that you actually wanted a child. I would hope that criteria of having children might be ACTUALLY WANTING A CHILD! It is obvious by the subsquent posts in this thread that you clearly have other priorities in your life at this time. I do not know about life in Holland, but in the USA, Drugs and children do not mix at any time! The American court system really frowns upon this. Please get your life together before inflicting it on an innocent child. Good Luck to you! DM
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By miraclefrmheavn
On 06/27/2008 12:56:35
I'm surprised this thread is still even here, and yes I do agree, this is even less amusing anymore. I will not condone drug addiction and I will not condone some of the language used in these posts that was absolutely mortifying. I will however pray for all of you because that is my nature. And to read some of these posts against the American government (even though I don't agree with the American government) is very sad and disturbing to me. What I find fascinating is that everyone bad mouths the American government but yet everyone seems to want to live here in America taking away jobs that the American people have worked so hard for. This whole entire thread has gone way overboard in my opinion and I do not condone it at all.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 06/27/2008 15:19:10
^BS, when I want you to condone my words and/or actions, I'll be sure to let you know. And don't bother praying for me because I'm beyond help. That should free up some prayer time so you can pray the Mexianos all go back to Mexico. Good luck with that.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By atypical_dancer
On 06/28/2008 22:05:23
"As for drugs, since I wouldn't be carrying the child smoking Cannabis will be an issue as long as I am careful of second hand smoke." And, FYI, this is NOT true. XY chromosome donors must be completely drug free for MINIMUM 90 days prior to conception. And I don't mean not using, I mean all the way out of your system and metabolized for 90 days so if you've ever done LSD that means NEVER. Male genetic material is just as succeptiable to chemical degradation as female, it's just replaced somewhat more often.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 06/28/2008 23:56:16
There is no such thing as an XY donor. And where in the world are you getting that information? A lot of people did acid in the 60s and their kids don't have 10 heads or anything.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By Celebrian
On 07/01/2008 11:10:09
Speaking of acid, this has been one bad trip.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By amarath
On 07/01/2008 12:07:37
Can I just say something fun and off-topic about Puritans? Actually, Puritans weren't nearly as bad as people make them out to be. They were sort of Zen, actually ... You could wear nice clothes (but not TOO NICE!), play cards (but not TOO OFTEN), listen and play music (but not so much that you forgot about God), et cetera, et cetera. Puritans = fun. It was the Pilgrims that were the un-funnest of the un-fun--as my history teacher described them last year, Pilgrims = Redneck Puritans.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 07/01/2008 12:43:52
^That's Puritan with a capital 'P'. Puritan with a lower-case 'p' means someone who always has a stick up their butt.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By d4j
On 07/09/2008 21:00:30
Just a little info... thankfully my kid is fine even though I have taken acid before. BUT - Do I recommend playing russian roulette like I did? NO, NO, NO. I have problems of my own because of lsd. Ok, moving on... AM - I am curious about your many posts that refer to "we". Are you referring to your crack team of spies or to the voices in your head? Either way, how can you possibly consider bringing a kid into your world? A world filled with "intell" and sneaky plans and late night blogging rants? What about school and soccer practice and homework and such? You're so underground your poor kid would never see the light of day...
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By panic
On 07/09/2008 22:01:30
^Just to clarify... LSD doesn't have any significant side-effects. HOWEVER, you just don't know what's in "LSD" when you buy it on the street. So don't do drugs, people. And if you absolutely must do drugs (I know some of you will - no matter what we say), don't ever ingest anything that was whipped up in someone's garage.
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By KayElle
On 07/10/2008 01:08:22
^ Word to that, and that isn't just limited to drugs that need to be "cooked up" somewhere - it applies to weed, too. Know your source!
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
By kandykane
On 07/10/2008 23:15:55
^^ Rottihound. Oh. My. kk~
re: Anyone else feel like breeding just gets harder at 30?
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