I hope I get this right.
Granted but now they think you can do anything and they have so many things they want you to do that they never leave you alone.

I wish I could play the guitar.

Granted! You can play the guitar. You do so well and become quite successful, that you get your own groupies and hundreds of creepy stalkers.



I wish for a million dollars!

Wish granted, but it's stolen and you get arrested.

I wish for some chocolate cake.

Granted but when you take your first bite you find you are suddenly allergic and your face swells up to 10 times it's size. Ouch!

I wish for a Hawaiian vacation.

Done and done! You go to a Hawaii. With an erupted volcanoe, shark attacks and a tropical storm happening at the same time somehow.




I wish I can get some new earrings.

Wish granted, but you pay a lot of money for the earrings & lose one the first time you wear them.

I wish I could have everythihg I want for Christmas.

Granted but that night your house gets broken into and everything is stolen. Oh yeah, they never did find any of your gifts.

I wish for some fried chicken.

Wish granted, but the chicken has not been prepared or cooked safely & you get a bad case of salmonella poisoning.

I wish for a trip to Europe.

Granted! You go to Europe. But only through the old fashion why of going on a large, wood galleon, where it takes you four months and face such diseases as scurvy and consumption.




I wish for amazing grades on my academic exams this month.

Granted, but the school records (including the exam scores) are all destroyed in a fire & everyone has to take all the tests again weeks later.

I wish I could be younger.

Granted but you are so young you can't talk and wear diapers.

I wish for a new cell phone.

Granted, but your new phone accidentally falls into the toilet and is ruined!

I wish I had a big cup of hot cocoa with by bamarshmallows on top.

Granted but the really hot cocoa spills on your lap and you suffer serious burns. Oh yeah, your marshmallows melted.

I would so like to be swimming in the ocean right now.

Granted, but you are surrounded by sharks!

I wish my Christmas tree was already decorated.

Done! But the tree is covered with R-Rated themed ornaments, causing a lot of commotion amongst your neighbours.



I wish for a brand new white tutu

Granted but you spill melted chocolate all over it and it doesn't come out!

I'd like a bowl of mac & cheese right about now.

Granted! But the mac and cheese has been sitting out in the sun for two weeks now, and then fell into the toilet - enjoy!




I wish for some soda right now.

Granted but instead of sugar they put salt in your can and it was so gross you had to toss it out.

I wish for a new printer (mine is broken.)

Granted, but the only thing it prints out is your most deepest darkest and embarassing secrets.




I wish for no snow to fall this week.

Granted but it's so cloudless that it's below freezing and you get frostbite and have to have a toe amputated.

I wish for a manicure.

Wish granted, but your nails wind up as metre long talons.

I wish to be at the beach.

Granted but you get stung by a whole bunch of jelly fish and end up in the hospital.

I wish for a handsome prince to sweep me off of my feet.

Granted, but after you & said handsome prince ride off into the sunsetto live happily ever after he turns into a toad!

I wish I never had to do laundry again.

Granted but the person who does your laundry shrinks you favorite articles of clothing and you have to sue.

I wish for a dog for Christmas, Charlie Brown! LOL (it's the name of a Christmas special but I added the Charlie Brown and a dog would be cute.)

Granted! You get a dog for Christmas - Snoop Dogg that is. For shizzle yo!




I wish I could visit the stars and the planets in the solar system.