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re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By atthebarre
On Wed Sep 02, 2009 09:26 PM
Parents who 'double book' their childs activities and then get upset with you when you tell them that dance is progressive learning and good attendance is mandatory. Please choose between girl scouts (or skating, or soccer...) and dance if it's offered at the same time.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By vista5Premium member
On Wed Sep 02, 2009 09:35 PM
My very worst parent is the one who brings their child ten to fifteen minutes late every week. I know it does no good to say anything to the child - she/he doesn't drive and they are already upset! Second place goes the the parents who pick the child up late every week. It is heartbreaking to see those kids standing bag in hand by the door for up to an hour after their class let out. And again, we don't mention it to the poor child who doesn't drive! Of course these are the parents who don't come in to the studio and are next to impossible to reach by phone. I have honestly stooped to calling them from a friend's cell because I am sure they are screening their calls and they really don't want to talk to me. Oh yeah, first place and second place can usually be awarded to the same parents!
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By thadancer
On Wed Sep 02, 2009 10:42 PM
How about the parent that is talking your head off about non sense, but they continually say well when are you starting class?

Let me think "when you shut the (expletive) up", is that a good time?
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By taps2much
On Wed Sep 02, 2009 10:58 PM
pre-dance/creative movement is great. It gets your child accustom to class structure, listening skills, physical activity and a joy of movement and music, however please don't believe that your child has had 3 years of ballet when she is coming into my primary ballet class at age 6 and ask me when she will be ready for pointe work. Yes this actually happened today!

Comment #8493642 deleted
Removed by oz_helen (35388) on 2009-11-19 17:15:27 not a teacher

re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By avandy83
On Thu Sep 03, 2009 09:22 AM
divamom1 wrote:

Funny how the kids of awful parents, owe money, only show half the time, always late, not in correct attire, disruptive to everyone seem to get favored in class and or the best spots in the routines! Please explain that to me. :)
DM


Divamom: I always look at the kids. First of all, I try my hardest not to play favorites, but it's hard not to when you have one student who is working their heart out every week and another who doesn't want to be there. I'm not going to punish a child for their parents actions, because that's not fair to the child. Now, I'm also not going to specifically favor them or put them in the "best spots" because of their parents either. That wouldn't be fair to the other students. But the students who get the "best spots" have earned it solely on their work ethic and ability.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By Dream_chaserPremium member
On Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:21 AM
I have had to explain to parents that any ballet that they had before the age of eight is not really ballet but a pre type of program and that real ballet training does not start before age 8 with proper techniques. So, when I ask how long they have danced, I ask also how much they have had after age 8 and how many hours per week in ballet.

Also, if your child takes ballet one hour per week, as opposed to kids who are taking 90 minute classes, three or more times per week in ballet, there is a difference. Technically, Pointe (on their toes) should not be offered to anyone who is not taking at least three 90 minute ballet classes per week, all year (not just Sept-June) for at least three years, if not more.

Also, not all girls will be able to do Pointe, ever. Some just do not have the physical attributes and it has nothing to do with how good that they are as dancers.

Parents, PLEASE... it is so bad to push a student into Pointe and any school that allows you to, run the other way.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By ms_tiffy
On Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:46 PM
We've talked about bringing students late, but please don't bring them 30 minutes early and leave because you want to go shopping. We are not daycare centers, and we have other classes that need our undivided attention. It is also not the responsibility of our receptionists to watch your children either.

If you must come early, stay with your child!

ALSO, just because you don't like the costume that we've gone to hell and back to pick out for your child, does not mean that you get out of paying your costume fee. Your child needs a costume to dance in the recital. The costume has to be paid for. No costume, no recital for your child. It's that simple.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By tapgirl1
On Thu Sep 03, 2009 07:53 PM
The major problem I have is...
When little Sally's Grandma, Aunt, friend,(take your pick) is coming up to visit for a week, please do not ask me if they can observe class that day. The answer is the same as it is for anyone who wants to observe - "Not until Parent Observation Week"
While I am not unsympathetic to the fact that your child doesn't get to see Grandma all that much, that does not give the right to distract my other students and disrupt the class. If we make an exception for you this week, then we have to make an exception for other people too. You are made aware when our observation week is from the beginning of the dance season - and our visitation policy. We encourage and welcome any interested family members and friends to come to class on the dates specified - other than that the answer is "no". We pride ourselves on providing quality dance education to every student and we can't do that if we always have different people viewing the class and waving to and cheering for their relative. (yes, that is what happened the few times I caved in when I was a younger teacher!)
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By Dream_chaserPremium member
On Thu Sep 03, 2009 09:19 PM
A lovely dance parent replied on Ask A Parent when I linked this to that board. It is obvious that she is a good dance parent. Please go here to read her reply but it is Ask A Parent so do not reply as a teacher, as it is for parents to reply.

www.dance.net . . .
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By hummingbird
On Fri Sep 04, 2009 09:44 AM
She's gem of a parent, I want to do a swap, a parent exchange perhaps ? Would that work ?
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By avandy83
On Fri Sep 04, 2009 10:12 AM
Um, this mom really needs to teach a class called "how to be an AWESOME dance mom". Or "how to make your child's dance experience wonderful." Or "How to not drive the dance teachers batty!" Really, I would make it mandatory for all of my parents.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By Dream_chaserPremium member
On Fri Sep 04, 2009 10:19 AM
Yes, but I have had gems, too, at my school, and honestly, aren't most great? It is just the few who make you nuts and I just got into the habit of not putting up with it. I would give them three chances and then they were out.

I also started to read people, and get my staff to do so, when signing people up. I told them if someone rubs them the wrong way, put them on the "waiting list" and contact me. I would then meet up with them and if they annoyed me, too, they stayed there with a reply, "We would love to have your child. Hopefully a space will open in the class. We will notify you." And then we prayed they were too impatient and went elsewhere.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By AllStar7779
On Fri Sep 04, 2009 04:59 PM
Man this thread really gets me going!

I would like to add that it's rude to tell a teacher "Ohh I saw you dance at recital and you were awesome! I had no idea you could dance like that, you sure don't look like a dancer." And then proceed to tell this to new parents that are enrolling at the studio, thinking that you are doing me a favor. Really?! First of all, I sure hope I can dance? And its not ok to complement someone by telling them they don't "look" like a dancer.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By Dream_chaserPremium member
On Fri Sep 04, 2009 05:08 PM
Remember that we are running a business to earn money. It is our real job and not a hobby. When you ask "Why" we charge this much or for that, you are basically negating the fact that we have a right to earn a living.

No one asks that at Walt Disney World, the doctor's office or Toy's R Us, but I am amazed at how many times people will ask. My parents NEVER thought to ask. If they could not afford it, we just did not do it. They did not try to get discounts or make them feel bad about earning money.

By the way, my brother, an auto mechanic, gets the same ludicrous questions.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By liv2dnz
On Sat Sep 05, 2009 10:02 AM
Please don't compare your child to children from other studios and want to know "Why don't we do those turns where they stick their leg out?" or "I don't think there are enough advanced movements in her solo. The other kids are doing harder moves." Please understand that just because you see someone doing a turn where they "stick their leg out" doesn't mean that they are doing it correctly. I will teach that movement when your child is technically ready. Also please understand that many of these dancers who are doing the "advanced movements" train for more hours each week than your child. Especially keep this in mind when I am suggesting your child register for more than one or two ballet and one jazz class each week, and you explain to me that you don't want to be at the studio that much or the extra ballet class conflicts with volleyball practice. A dancer who trains for 10 hours each week will dance better than a dancer who trains for 3 or 4.

Thank you for writing this. It is amazing that parents who do not want to spend more time at the studio is the one who expects her child to do the technically difficult steps...
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By DancinDiva5678
On Sat Sep 05, 2009 06:08 PM
Although the ultimate wish would be for none of us to ever have to deal with parents like this, the reality is obviously not so and with that said, I'm thankful that I am not the only one dealing with these people!!

It is extremely frustrating when emails are sent, hardcopies are sent home and phone calls are made, yet parents still give us the naive, "but I didn't know excuse." Particularly with tuition- it's due by the same date every month with a late fee after that date. How can you not know?????

If you have a problem with whatever, please be considerate that teachers often teach back to back classes and cannot sit with you for 20 minutes to discuss your concerns- we'd be happy to schedule a meeting with you.

I agree that dance is different than school in a lot of ways but it is also fairly similar. If your child has a substitute teacher at school, no one is required to notify you. If your child is going to be absent from school, you call to let them know he/she will not be in. I'm sure you try your best to get them to school on time- so why should these things be different for dance??

I'm happy that your child is finding other activities and interests, but we cannot change the schedule simply because your child wants that class and cannot make the time that we have set. Urgh!

The "my mom didn't do laundry" excuse is completely ridiculous to me. A) Buy more than one leotard B) Wash your dance clothes right after class C) Wash it yourself!

Feels good to get this all off my chest! There are many more but most have already been said multiple times.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By Dream_chaserPremium member
On Sat Sep 05, 2009 06:18 PM
Yes, the I DID NOT KNOW thing is just that, a dumb excuse. Really, if you are an adult, you are supposed to be responsible, and once your child is a teen, they should be, too.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By RosePremium member
On Sun Sep 06, 2009 10:12 AM
Parents who pay by Auto Pay are required to fill in an accountnumber THEY OWN.
Do not annoy the studio with your ex's number. Keep the studio out of your nasty divorce.

And no, filling in the accountnumber of Greenpeace is also NOT appreciated. Not by Greenpeace, not by the studio.

If you do one or more of the above, we will think very negative of you for the rest of your life.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By tappergurl
On Sat Sep 19, 2009 01:40 PM
Don't talk about the studio you came from. You may think that we want to hear all of the nasty stories you have to tell about our "rivals", but I honestly don't have the time of day for petty gossip. All it does is make you look bitter and vindictive and half of the time I know the other teacher/studio owner and we get along well. It also makes me nervous to warm up to you or your child as I am concerned about what you might say about our studio when you leave (and you invariably will, these types of parents are "studio hoppers").

On a different note, please do not complain and bully me when I tell you that your 4 year old is not allowed to take the primary class. Our studio has a strict policy that students only move out of the preschool program and into the regular program when they go into grade primary (or kindergarten). Children that go to school begin to act differently and start to need different things, just from the school experience alone, no matter how mature your 4 year old is. We warn parents from the beginning that if they start their child at age 2 (which we do offer classes for) then they will be in the preschool program for 3 years. It is the parent's choice if they want to wait until their preschooler is 3 or 4 to start dance classes, but I won't be the bad guy just because your child has a January 1st birthday. The school board won't let your child in until she/he is 5 and you don't fight with them about it!!!
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By tappergurl
On Sat Sep 19, 2009 01:46 PM
Another thing, I can't talk to you between classes, I have 5 minutes to get a drink, use the washroom, change my shoes, etc. before I have to either return to the same room or change rooms with another teacher (in which case I have to gather all of my music and notes as well). Your child might be done for the day but I'm not, I teach 6 hours of dance each night and chances are I don't really want to talk to you at 9:00 either. Please make an appointment to speak with me another time or call the studio during the day when I am prepping for class.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By princessofmaple
On Sun Sep 20, 2009 11:26 AM
Please don't undermine my discipline. If your child did not get a sticker/coloring page/treat for whatever reason, don't tell your child they did a good job and tell them you will take them to McDonald's or that you will get them their own stickers.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By onyourtoes03
On Sun Sep 20, 2009 11:50 PM
YES, Dont use your child to get out of something you have decided she is only 9. If you dont like the way I teach fine but telling your child that she has learned everything that I can teach her already (WOW) is sad it is not my fault that she does not take my pointers and corrections NO ONE IS PERFECT I can only tell her what she is doing wrong I can not do it or fit it for her maybe it is best that you went somewhere else so you can see it is not my teach but the fact that she doesnt want to correct her mistakes.
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By faerydust00Premium member
On Mon Nov 09, 2009 06:43 PM
When I am nice enough to let you have a say in whether or not we use 2 separate costumes or a 2-in-1 costume, please do not write in on the side of the survey question that you think my prices are too high. If you think so, take your child elsewhere and see if you can get your costumes (and tuition, etc.) cheaper...with a fundraiser to help you cover costs!!!
re: The PERFECTLY BAD dance school parent. - this is for parents to read, too (but not reply).
By hummingbird
On Tue Nov 10, 2009 01:40 PM
When your told your teenage daughter has been playing hooky and not coming to lessons and your presented with the evidence of the roll call book, stop defending them and admit that their lying through their teeth !

Just admit it, sometimes the little cherubs will 'adjust' the truth to suit their needs.
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