Forum: Arts / Diaries

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re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Nov 12, 2011 05:20 PM
You know something??? At uni I wanted everyone elses' uni experiences. In France I wanted everyone elses' ski experiences, in South America, the same, at camp, the same. I'm always jealous. The grass always appears greener. It's not.

Most of those people I've been jealous of have been focused on one thing, not lots of different things, like me. I can never make up my mind. Which is a strange revelation, because in the short term, I can make my mind up so easily. I'm so not sure what to do with my life. I think I should go back to uni, but only so I can find it easier to get a job, so I think my best plan is to continue to try to find a job here, and this time next year, if I'm still completely unsuccessful, I should look into going back to uni to study something else. Maybe not a full time undergrad, but I should be saving the whole time to pay for something else. I looked up the University of Barcelona, and I could go there, to do a postgrad, and it's just about €3000 for one year, but that's the English site, not necessarily foreign students, so I don't know. Though that's a pretty good deal, just difficult to learn through Spanish. Would definitely relish the challenge though. So I need to really really really work on my Spanish language skills. Whenever I get the opportunity.

Of course, only if I can't find a job, but I want to keep learning Spanish anyway, so I think I should just keep going.

Am also very muchly looking forward to going out (properly) tomorrow night, not fake going out, like we did tonight, going to a pre-drinks party, and that being the night out. I'm going to go to bed very soon, because then I'll be able to get up in the morning.

It's my first day of my period today, so I'm grumpy, but I guarantee I'll now sleep very well, and hopefully not bleed onto the sheets. That would be rather pants.

I have had a few drinks, and am at a nice stage of merry. I think tomorrow I need to eat plenty to not get too drunk so I can keep up with the rest, and not be falling over on the way home. Not a good look, particularly not if I think I might be walking from the bus with just one person who I'm trying to figure out if I'm interested in him, or just the idea of him. Been this way about him for quite a while. Think I should really figure it out, so I can possibly get over it, if needs be. As for the boy that was a potential, I definitely think I can't get over the military thing, which is disappointing, but no matter.

Tomorrow I must finish application to job, text Kathryn before meeting with them all, and sort out bank payments for moving into flat. Also possibly organise first Christmas present, as I'm still in the right end of town. Lots going on. Night night. xx
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sun Nov 13, 2011 05:42 PM
^That post was written when I came in from being out and having 3 cans of pimms. That's pre-mixed cans that really aren't strong. And I woke up with a raging headache. I think I was quite tipsy, probably to do with me not having had much to eat yesterday (I never do when I'm on my first day of my period) and the aforementioned period.

Anyway, I also wrote this in my phone and saved it to my drafts (I do it a lot when I want to remember stuff) "Not just about green grass. About regrets. Ok Go. Get over it." ( . . .)

So as an explanation, I wanted to go to sleep, but I really felt the need to get that out. Then I could have ranted on for ages, but my eyes were hurting, so I decided to save that in my phone so I could remember and come back to it in the morning, but I forgot. As for the song reference, I had been thinking about my regrets, or mistakes, through the years, as I was getting ready to go to a student party, after graduating 4 years ago, and still being almost in the student mindset... When that song came on.

So basically, what I think, is that I have regrets about "mistakes", but I should get over it, and refer to it as "experience" rather than "mistakes".

It actually has not very much to do with me "getting over" wanting, or thinking I want, a certain someone. Anyway, I feel that my above post was a little cryptic, so I shall explain.

The first big paragraph is fairly self explanatory, if I don't find a good job here, I'm going to look into learning better Spanish and going to the uni of Barca to study for a postgrad qualification. Not sure if it will help my employability, but I think it would be much more straightforward to enter a Spanish university than a UK one without a 2:1 degree. As some of their postgrad levels don't require undergrads.

I went to the pub tonight with the guys from uni. Used to go out with them quite a lot... Same pub, round the corner from most of us, though now most of us have moved away to various spots... It wasn't really proper going out, not with two of them catching a flight in the morning, but it was good to sit in the pub and eat and drink and chat... I did think I was going to be getting the bus home but because we met so early, with Kathryn having a flat viewing 2-4pm, so we met at 4ish, one of the boys was surfing earlier, and drove to the pub rather than home with his surfboard then catching the bus, so he only had one and drove both of us home. Incidentally, same boy I'm not sure if I'm interested in him or the idea of him. Urghness Arghness not sure ness. However, when I got out of the car (sitting behind him, since his board was spread through the car over the passenger seat) I did think that there was a little bit of awkwardness with him stood there... (Two door car) Not sure if he was expecting me to hug him, though I'm not a huggy person, or what... It was weird. He's quite lovely, I think I really do like him, because he's just so easy to get along with. So what I really must do, is catch up with him more often, spend more time with him, figure out if he does like me, or if I'm delusional, and then move on with that information either by just moving on, and getting over it, or the more attractive option of getting closer. Which I'm guessing would be awkward, but a different kind of awkward than it's been with the boy who I've been in contact with for the past ages.

Who, by the way, was on facebook today when I was online, but didn't chat to me, and I sent him the last text, so I think that's a clear message from him. Though I do want to see him again, because even though we never started anything properly, I do want to end it properly, because I don't want any awkwardness. Not that I'm likely to see him much again, but you never know, we might both end up in the aviation industry together.

As for the to do list, got a fair bit done, only didn't organise first Christmas present.


I'm quite glad that I've got all of that above out of the way. I needed to say that to myself really. That I need to reconcile myself to the fact that I made the choices I did because they were right for me at the time (word for word what was said to me in the car on the way back from the pub, though I think he was talking about his own choices a little, so yeah.) and now I can base my life on the foundation of those choices, and know that I am moving in the right direction. Because I know that I want to find a serious long term job, one with stability, and I can settle into a life with a future that's stable, and plan for things. That's nice. My choices are not mistakes. They are things that happened to me and by me, and I can control my future based on my past. I know that I don't need to be like everyone else, to have all the fun experiences, because I've had plenty, I really have. I just need to realise that I don't need to have had them recently so much anymore. I'm looking forward to moving flat tomorrow. Grown up!
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Thu Nov 17, 2011 07:33 AM
Working tonight, and Sunday. Hopefully have a few more shifts next week.

Washing machine went kaput today. Stinks, but the letting agent can't smell it. He thinks my clothes smell of laundry, I can smell burning from them. I'll be doing that load again when the new machine comes. Very annoying though, I need clean underwear probably before the machine turns up. I think I'll be wearing burning smelling pants, but the rest will go back in unwashed.

He warned me about a weird noise, not sure what it was. I waited for it, and thought everything was ok, turns out it wasn't. It was on the spin cycle and sounded like all the dishes were falling from the cupboards. I ran in, smelt burning, panicked, turned the machine off, couldn't open it to get my clothes out (one top I've worn only a few times!) and phoned the letting agent. I explained the problem, and he came round, while waiting, I opened all the windows, turned on the fans, and when he turned up, he couldn't smell burning anywhere. He can't figure out what it is, though he has a few theories, but I know that it's a fire hazard and I'm not happy with it, so it's being replaced.

Now I'm just trying to figure out how long I can wait before complaining about the shower curtain, which is fairly disgusting. I hate shower curtains, they get mouldy and dirty and you can't clean them easily.

Anyway, other than that, the new flat is lovely, I've got mostly a full complement of groceries in, for an awful lot cheaper than they're worth because I had all sorts of vouchers to use, which was nice, and I could have used them a lot more frivolously, particularly the M&S vouchers, but I got some lovely things that will last a little while, and are worth the little bit more that they would be from there. Great!

So now I just have to find another job, and get more hours in the job I'm in, and sort out my love life.

I think life's pretty good at the minute.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Nov 19, 2011 05:07 AM
Did I mention that when I walk out my front door I see Edinburgh castle to my right down the street? Well, I do!


I text the boy that picked me up from the airport, to arrange to see him again, since I last saw him quite a while ago. But he hasn't replied. I think that's a fairly big indication that he doesn't want to see me. Ho hum, oh well. I think I had decided that I couldn't reconcile with the military aspects of his life anyway, so to have him decide the same thing, no matter how he came to the decision, is ok. Unless he's pissed at me not contacting him. Oh well, that's not really my fault. It's just a little childish.


The new flat really is lovely, it's not too cold, it heats up easily, and it's not too hot. It's got lovely high ceilings, even though the decor does leave a lot to be desired! I'm very much looking forward to flatmates properly moving in. Did I explain this one?? (Just checked, I did, Fri 4th Nov.) Anyway, we still have to choose one flatmate. Jana is not here very much, about 2-3 nights per week, and Claire has not moved in yet, she's from Ireland, seems a bit young, but is nice, from the brief introduction. The last room is the most expensive room, but is still very cheap for the area (I'm so lucky on that front!) so I hope we get a good mix of people in to view it. However one of the older flatmates who has yet to move out was here yesterday and leaves with the last of her things today. I was chatting to her yesterday and we were watching tv. I'm not sure if it was a nervous thing, but I don't know how it could be since she never has to see me again, but she wouldn't stop talking!!! In my house, we only talk over the tv during ad breaks. We only watch tv if there's something on that we want to see, otherwise it's off, and I don't watch a lot, but I wanted some mindless tv time and she felt the need to talk, and talk, and talk. It was ok, she's ok to chat to, but I'm glad I don't have to live with her, I think she would be hard to deal with all the time.

It does make me wonder though, when we chose Claire, there were 3 people came, and the first was third on my list, but second on Jana's, though the girl whose room I took, who was there to offer advice (I hadn't yet moved in, and she vice versa) said that girl #1 was very bouncy and it would be hard to sustain that all the time and she might get on your nerves. Interesting perspective when I see that that is the impression I got from the girl who she was supposedly very close to.


I need to get up and shower and eat and look up jobs etc. I just know that when I do get up, I'll have to be sociable, and I'm not sure that I can be, when I know I don't have to make the effort. Hmmmm.

My bum's gone a bit numb, I've been sitting this way for much too long, and only been on ddn. Huh.


I don't have any real updates on my life today. We'll see come the end of next week and the end of the year...
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Nov 19, 2011 08:08 AM
3rd section down?? Turns out she's not that bad, think she was nervous about going out to meet the guy she saw last night, then when she came back on a high from seeing him. Anyway, she's actually pretty nice, though such a hoarder, so I helped her chuck stuff, I'm pretty ruthless.

Then she gave me a north face wooly hat and loads of food! Though I'd actually planned on writing this before we went into the kitchen.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By GrinsPremium member
On Sat Nov 19, 2011 03:17 PM
Hooray for throwing things away! Ruthless culling is where it's at.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Tue Nov 22, 2011 04:54 AM
Yes, yes it is.

So we had a meeting at work yesterday, and it turns out I know nothing about the place I work at. So I need to study the brochures so I can give answers to questions etc.

Fun fun fun.

Anyway, just wanted to say that. I'm getting up now, going to do some Christmas shopping I think. It's midday.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Tue Nov 22, 2011 07:01 PM
So lets elaborate on that last post...

We had a meeting at 3pm. It started pretty much on time. First off, a "staff info test", which if you've never heard of such a thing, was basically this quiz:

Spoiler: Show
1. How much is the Christmas menu in the main bar?

2. How much does it cost for the hogmanay buffet in main bar?

3. Name two [company] venues which are open on christmas day?

4. How much is a pint of tennents in the main bar?

5. Name three house spirits?

6. What time do we stop serving the lunch menu in the main bar?

7. What time are we licensed until on new years eve?

8. How much is a latte in the main bar?

9. How much deposit to we need to book a snug?

10. What time does the band start on a saturday in:
i: Main Bar
ii: Auditorium.

So aside from it written all in caps, that's it word for word and punctuation identical, even though some "name" questions didn't require question marks, they had them.

Anyway, apparently some of the supervisors only got 4 or 5 right, I think I only answered 5. I've been looking up the answers, because apparently excuses like "I'm not here that long" don't cut it. Even though I really shouldn't be expected to remember ALL of that in such a short space of time. Though I suppose I really should have known the Christmas things.

After doing the quiz, we had half an hour of listening to the main manager speak to us about how we need to pick up standards for christmas, but it should be ok. Target income, numbers, etc. It was 3.30pm when he finished, and we waited for the Christmas menu tasting.

Cue another session of him complaining at everyone for just tucking in before figuring out what the food was, or letting everyone see the food. (I didn't even get a look at what a couple of the starters were.) Anyway, food was really good, glad I work in a place where it is tasty. Then we went downstairs for a floor staff meeting while the bar staff had their own meeting. Theirs was finished much sooner than ours, because their manager didn't have to run off halfway through and hand over control of the meeting to supervisors.

I'm glad I did sit until 5.30pm though. Yes, that's right, 5.30pm, it took that long... It was mostly going over the common sense things, but reiterating what was expected of us. Some things I was surprised were even coming up, others I was more surprised (but not the correct word for it) that we were expected to do. Like if someone comes into the main bar that's going to the auditorium, don't point them that direction, actually take them there.

So what I got from the meeting was that we are expected to do everything for the customer except wipe their arse. Yet we wear a kilt and rugby shirts. Interesting. I'll be careful to make sure that I'm always doing something when I'm in from now on.

You know something I've just thought of, one of the supervisors asked me to get her something, and I couldn't because it wasn't organised, so I had to organise it first, and then she told me that she hadn't asked me to do that, and now I'm realising that that was probably a mistake, yet there I was thinking that it might reflect well on me. (The organising needed done, but by me doing it, it put her home time back too, except it didn't.)

I think it's fairly obvious that the management and supervisors are young. Most of the management are younger than me, and I'm only 25. I find that a little weird, because it's a big venue. It doesn't matter to me, all it means is that I have to work hard to make sure that the right people see me doing the jobs they want done.

The main reason why I elaborated on the meeting is because at 5.30pm, when I headed off to dance class, one of the other new girls started to walk off with me, and told me that she'd just been laid off because they didn't have time to train her. After making her stay for 2 and a half hours, unpaid. Professional. They really should have spoken to her before she sat down. Ridiculous.

As for the answers...
1. £24.95
2. £20
3. I've got answers to that one, but I'm not putting them here.
4. ???
5. Gordon's, Smirnoff, Bacardi, Morgan's.
6. 5pm
7. 5am
8. £1.80?
9. £10 Per person. (Very badly worded question by the way!)
10. i. 9.30 & ii. 11pm (10.30 on a Friday)

So I need to go in tomorrow and find out the answers to those questions, and some more that I have.


I did some Christmas shopping today, like I said I would. I got Caroline's present, or the first part of it. I got part of Eoin's present. I got part of Nuala's present. I know what I'm going to buy for Kathryn and for the next part of Caroline's and Nuala's, I don't know what to get Tom or Mervyn. Caroline and I are buying Lucy something together. I think I'm fairly organised.

Tomorrow I need to book my ferry home and back again for Christmas. Urgh.

Right now I'm going to get ready for, and into bed. Need to be up by 10am, at the latest.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Wed Nov 23, 2011 07:28 PM
Two things to do with work tonight: Chatting about travel, and new start.

(That's just a reminder as this is only a quick post to share these thoughts without trying to explore them myself.)

So... I found out that one of the other girls that started at the same time as me (about a week or so later) is actually living with a friend of the girl who does the scheduling, and signed a full time contract. Which I'm kind of annoyed about, because I wanted a ft contract, so if there was one going, why didn't I get it?!?! Although now I'm less annoyed that she's getting more hours than me, because I thought she was part time, and it was making me question myself. Anyway.

I also found out that the newest supervisor (she just got promoted) has got her friend in doing a trial shift soon. So yeah, why are they taking on more staff when I want more hours??? Ok, yes, they need more per shift, but just so long as she doesn't wind up getting a ft contract too!

Though the fact that that has happened, and they let the other girl go on Monday is interesting... Do they think that everyone turns up fully trained knowing everything they need to for the venue?! They're going to have to train her at least a little!

Then we were chatting about travel, and it made me wish I was travelling again. But going to live somewhere, and work, and move on, not just travel. Anyway. It's made me realise, I'm going to have to figure out my life, decide what I want to do with it. Then I can think about travelling somewhere if I want to. Though just typing out that paragraph, I'm actually parroting what the girl I was chatting with was saying, and realising that I was that way, but right now, I'd rather travel for short periods, and come back to a stable job and home. Interesting. I'm older. (Than I was, not than her, though that is true as well!)

So that's all for tonight. I'm going to read a few of the other diaries, and then sleep. Tomorrow I'm going to apply to a few jobs that I've seen advertised; Do some more laundry; Go to work at 3pm.

Did I mention? I booked my ferry home, and... bonus! They've changed the crossing from Belfast > Stranraer to Belfast > Cairnryan. If you're interested enough to look up those two Scottish towns and see how much further north Cairnryan is, you'll see why it's a bonus... The travel time on the bus is severely shorter!!! So I was able to book later times and still arrive at decent hours. I also can spend plenty of time with my family. And I may have a travel companion who works with me, she's booked the same days off, and will be travelling on the same days as me, but hasn't decided yet if she's going to take the bus, or the train.

With the bus, you get on in Edinburgh, get off at the Ferry port, and move on. With the train, you get on in Edinburgh, off in Glasgow, switch to the other station (5 minute walk) then with the new ferry, there isn't a train station in Cairnryan, so you get off in Ayr, and get the coach to Cairnryan, and move on. So it's an awful lot more hassle, for more money, and yeah... I'm not sure why anyone would choose to take the train. Unless you have a young person's rail card, because then that is the cheaper option.

Finally (maybe this isn't such a short post) I need to organise my social life for Christmas. Obviously Christmas eve and Christmas day I have had planned since forever ago, because it's a tradition that I'm happy to keep. Which leaves one other night, and I would like to have two separate nights out with two different groups of people. Hmmm... Just realised that problem. Well, family comes first, so if I can get a night out on boxing night with my cousins, then that would be fantastic. What would be an even bigger bonus would be if I invited them down to my house, and we all went out to one of the biggest nightclubs in Northern Ireland, which is close to me (which is weird, since it's a small town, but in terms of transport, it's sort of in the middle, so that's why it's so big, everyone can get there easily!) and then I can go out with my friends from home too. I might try to organise that tomorrow. I'll get in touch with the cousins first, figure out if they have plans for that night.

And now I'm off.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Thu Nov 24, 2011 09:32 PM
I was supposed to finish at 1am, but stayed until 4am... Great, that's an extra 3 hours pay, and a lot of that was on the cloakroom! Bonus!!!

Downside: Walking home later. (In pissing rain, but no matter!) . . .

If you would be so kind as to click on the link and offer advice, I would be ever so grateful. Ta!!
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Fri Nov 25, 2011 05:29 PM
Excellent... Both flatmates were in tonight when I arrived in and I was able to chat to them... I'm glad that we managed to do that, and Claire's lovely, it's just weird that she moved in on Wednesday, but we were ships that pass in the night until tonight, and it's Friday!!!

My room's a tip.

Looking forward to Monday and Wednesday... I can have a long lie on Monday, and I've got dance class at 6pm. I can't miss it, I requested the theme!! It would be very poo if I had to miss it, we have floor staff training at 8pm, but there's been another training announced on either Monday or Tuesday, at 7pm and 6pm respectively... My Monday dance class is 6pm to 7pm... So as long as they don't change floor staff training to 6.30pm, then I can still go to dance class. Rrrrgh.

Right off to bed. Sleepy bye byes!!!
re: Lets see what happens next...
By mandakp
On Sun Nov 27, 2011 09:26 PM
Emma wrote:

Did I mention that when I walk out my front door I see Edinburgh castle to my right down the street? Well, I do!

That is so cool.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Mon Nov 28, 2011 04:47 PM
Woohooo... So I was supposed to go to dance class 6 to 7pm, training at 7pm to 9. Only it was cancelled, and I got to enjoy the dance class, but I found out when I was walking to dance base. So now I'm confused as to whether I'm working or just at training tomorrow, because I couldn't really hear on the phone, slash tuned out when I heard cancelled...

Anyway, it was an excellent Flashdance themed class, and a huge workout for both the body and the mind, so a great end to term. Especially as I didn't miss any part of it.

As for tomorrow, I will just turn up at like half 5 (I start at 6pm, and we have to be in the building 15 minutes before shift so we can change and be on the floor on time.) and see whether I'm working or not. on that one.

Work's going well otherwise, I'm getting plenty of hours, and we're busy in January, so that's good, I will still get shifts galore, which is what I want and need. I think when I start a new job, I always have a pants first few weeks, then I have a breakthrough, and everything goes more or less swimmingly after that. I think I'm past that stage, so all is good.

And yes, it is very cool. I am quite in love with my flat, and the area... Generally it's lovely.

Oh! And I'm getting a bike... my friend is giving me hers so it actually gets used, so that's handy. I'm going round to hers the day after her birthday, I invited myself to crash her hangover, so that shall be fun! I need to figure out what to get her for her birthday.

Finally, all my Christmas shopping is almost done. I may finish it off on Wednesday, or maybe not, we shall see.

I think recently I've said the same thing again and again, because when I've posted, I've been too tired to even realise that I actually said this already, it's weird.

I didn't mention that I met up with the girls on Sunday for lunch, and it was lovely to catch up properly, and know that I can see them again soon.

Everyone has finally moved into the flat, so now we can sort out a cleaning schedule and the flat kitty etc... I'm going to clean the bathroom tomorrow though, then after that we can do a schedule, because it's possibly mostly me that made that mess.

Ok, now I really am done.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Wed Nov 30, 2011 06:20 PM
I said I was due to start work at 6pm Tuesday? Hell no... turns out it was 5pm and I realised at 10 minutes to! (I have to be there fifteen minutes before the start of shift, and it takes 10-15 minutes to walk. I left at 5 to, and managed to sign in and was on the floor by 15 minutes past.)

Anyway. Life's excellent at the minute. Tuesday I did bugger all, cleaned the bathroom and made out a new cleaning schedule, so hopefully I'm able to stick to it!!

Today I got up, and I farted around a little, tidied up my mess from leaving in a mad panic yesterday (I had made my dinner but never ate it!) Then I looked at the plans I had made for dinner with the girls....

The girls (and guy) I stayed with for a month when I first got back to Edinburgh came round for dinner tonight, except for one who couldn't make it. I'm pleased to say it went rather well!

I had to sort out transferring the virgin media account into my name (phone internet and tv) but was waiting for post from home so I had two proofs of address, one new and one old, and I could have done it yesterday, but wound up waiting until today. I thought I would have to go quite far into town to find a photocopiers and was going to go to a big supermarket to buy the food I needed...

Then I remembered Caz telling me about her eating with a friend who lives up this direction, and walking with him to a greengrocer and getting a mountain of veg for really cheap, so I decided to go in search of that.

I wound up buying a little tub of cherry tomatoes, 3 chillies, a huge bunch of mint, a bunch of spinach, a tub of mixed baby salad leaves, a carrot, 5 peppers, an avocado, a courgette, a sweet potato, a tub of mushrooms, a cucumber and some dried apricots for £11.50!!!

Then I thought I would have to go to the M&S in town anyway to buy enough fish for everyone, but discovered a fishmongers as well (turns out it's a pretty famous one even outside Edinburgh!) so I bought a few more fillets. Then went to the local co-op for milk, dip and stock cubes, and then the local expensive independent grocers for cider, coriander and wholemeal flour... except I bought ground coriander, not leaves, because I asked for leaves, and he gave me ground and I didn't check, and I couldn't find wholemeal flour anyway.

So then I baked, then moved around furniture, then prepared dinner, then my guests turned up, and we had a very lovely successful evening.

I served:

To nibble on as they arrived before the food was ready. (I didn't want to put anything in the oven until they arrived)
Salt & Vinegar and Sour cream & onion pringles with a sour cream and chive dip.

To drink on arrival & through the evening.
Mulled Cider & Mulled Wine (everyone had a bit of both!)

For main course.
Smoked Haddock fillets.
Chilli cous cous.
A tomato, chilli and mint salsa (very hot!) Needed to put some yoghurt on the table to balance it...
Roasted peppers, mushrooms, courgette and sweet potato.
A Mixed leaf salad with carrot, cucumber and avocado.
And a couple of fancy M&S salad dressings.

For dessert.
Apricot and Honey muffins with Ben & Jerry's cherry garcia frozen yoghurt and Mackie's Vanilla ice cream.

I'm impressed that I co-ordinated it all well, and had everything ready pretty much on time, with a little bit of help from French flatmate (she's new, moved in Sunday, we're now complete, as I said already.)

It really was a lovely evening, though my hands are on fire with the amount of rubbing them through the chillies I was doing, but no matter, they will calm down soon, I hope!

Then German flatmate arrived as everyone was leaving (The girls were knackered as they're all doing their honours projects at the minute, and spending so much time doing research etc. (they're all studying physiotherapy)) but she got an introduction, and then we washed up before they left... And they forgot their plates! (We don't have enough plates to have 6 people eat dinner at the same time, so they had to provide those!) Anyway, I'll bring them with me to work on Friday.

So the four of us sat and chatted for a while in the living room, we arranged the kitty, and I'd already spoken about the cleaning schedule with everyone. So yes, I'm very happy with the flat situation. I'm also very happy with the area I'm living in, the shops round about are lovely, and I can find everything I need without needing to go into town! The only downside is that in the winter months when the evening are darker, The Meadows can be more dangerous, but if I am careful on my way to work, and take a slightly longer route around them on the way home from work, I should be fine.

Anyway, everything is good at the moment. We shall see how life pans out over the next few weeks... I need to not get complacent on the Christmas shopping front, because I actually don't have as much time as I think to finish it off!!!

I am working at 6pm tomorrow. I checked.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Tue Dec 06, 2011 07:21 PM
So I've had some uneventful days and some eventful days recently. Stayed late a couple of shifts at work. Plan being that I want to make myself seem indispensable so that they put me on for more shifts. I'm starting to think it might backfire into seeming like I can't get anything finished on time, so we'll see how that one works out... I plan on doing a bit of both. Working hard and getting away early, and working later to show that I can do whatever.

Friday night I stayed late, and I thought I was supposed to be working Saturday, but it turned out I was on at 10am on Saturday morning, so that was a nice revelation when I checked the rota at half one at night! After I could have got away at quarter to one, or just before it, but I'd missed finding the supervisor, and when I did see her, it was when the fire alarm was going off... Poo!!!! So we all got a little bit bollocked for taking too long to get the customers out, but really, when you have to ask them to be quiet so they can hear the fire alarm it's not really effective. I'm not sure what went wrong, except that it wasn't a fire. And the police had to interview someone who refused to leave.

Saturday I learnt a lesson that I need to learn how to read a function sheet properly. In work, we have functions like weddings, conferences and various parties, and some things went wrong with set up, which really shouldn't have, but did because no one seems to take the time to read a function sheet properly and read it properly to have it properly set up and co-ordinate everything. I'm going to work harder on that one, even though I'm not a supervisor, because I don't want to have to deal with stressful shifts again. I think that sort of lesson sometimes needs re-enforced though. Like it was today. Back to that later.


So everything went a bit up the swanee, but I did help out and stay until 10pm, instead of finishing at 6pm, and it was like two different shifts!! The evening shift went off without a hitch, and I managed to create tables for walk-ins and get more business and all the rest of it, and I never had a lot of tables open at once, my section had 8, but only 5 max at any one time, though I think I turned over 12 tables, or maybe more? Anyway, it was pretty good. Then at 10pm, I went home and sat up doing nothing.


Sunday I slept in, then got up, chatted to Irish flatmate for a bit, watched The Goonies, then went out to meet my friend Jade, who's birthday had been the day before, where I watched her dye her hair blonder, gave her a small box of chocolates, and she gave me her bike. Then I realised that I couldn't cycle back in the dark without lights, and couldn't cycle on such an awful flat tyre, so had to walk home. I think it took me an hour and a half, because the roads were slightly icy, and I was pushing a bike, so I wasn't exactly walking at a normal speed. Got back late, dinner late, but made plans with Caz to meet her the following day.


I wanted up fairly early on Monday, so I woke at 8.30 and got up at 9am. Made porridge and chatted to flatmates, pottered around the flat. Picked up my personal alarm that I bought online and had been delivered with a signature required when no one was in, so was at the post office round the corner... Discovered more cool places to go! I love this area to live in. Anyway. Then I went down into town. I live south, but atop a hill, so down.... I stopped off at the bike shop, and asked about the bike that had been given to me, but left out all last winter, so how much would it cost to have it checked over etc. They do a basic service for £20, and anything I might need on top of that like a chain or cables could bring it up to £50. So yeah, not bad, for a free bike. I'm not riding it until after Christmas though, because not only will I be working ridiculous hours and want to taxi it home when I'm finished at the same time as other people up this way, but when I go home, I may get some "bike shit" for Christmas as I've asked for it as presents... So we'll see! Yay.

The actual shopping part went well, by the time I made it further down the road, I was kind of cold, and I passed a shop with a sign for 95p cups of soup, so I bought some tomato and basil, then had to waste time in hmv looking at dvds to finish it, because I hate walking along drinking stuff, because I hate walking slowly. Then I went round to fat face, realised that I can't afford to buy my brother what I want to, so I'm going to wrap up a pillow with printed out pictures of the kinds of things I want to buy him, and chop them in half... Then take him shopping. After that, I headed down to the north (the down makes sense, but also doesn't. Anyway) to find the bead shop that I'd been to once before. So it took me rather a long time to find it, not least because I stopped in Sallys along the way and bought more hair dye, but I'm not sure if I want that colour or not, but at least I know that that's a good Sallys and I can always go there again if I decide I want to buy a different colour, like red, or blonde. Whatever. Then I turned the wrong direction because I thought I'd be more likely to find somewhere with a toilet that direction, walked for about 15 minutes before finding somewhere, then turned back on myself. Eventually made it to the bead shop, and bought a few fake pandora beads for my sister's bracelet (I bought her a real one too!) and got distracted and bought myself some beads for Christmas earrings, so I have one pair that's a snowman and a snowflake, and another that are jingly jangly Santa Christmas bells, which are super fun. At which point I had to head back into town to meet Caz at the freeze shop at 3.30, to laugh at her trying on ski goggles, and indeed I did laugh, it was rather hilarious, but she was trying on some pretty goggles, so I couldn't laugh too much! Really made me want to go to the snowy mountains!

We then made our way through H&M, and for once, I went into the shop and didn't buy anything, which really is a first for me... Madness! We had to pick up a black shirt for her flatmate who was working that night (the one that works with me.) Then we headed on... to TK Maxx. Oh dear, that shop is a disaster when I get into it in the right/wrong mood (depending on what way you look at it!) So we headed up towards the baby section, but got distracted by belts on the way up, and gloves, and I picked up a belt and gloves, then we hoked through the baby clothes and found loads of really cool outfits, then decided what we really liked, and what was actually in the wrong section in terms of size and we needed to put back even though it was cute. We narrowed it down to 2 items, and then we headed away from there... I found the knitwear, and I'd been looking for a Christmassy jumper, so I started to poke through all of that, and found some absolute gems! One gorgeous cardigan that was £60, but I know that I could probably find one in a charity shop at home for less than a tenner! (A traditional Irish Aran style, but not from Aran.) We found some cute dresses as well, and these hideous shirts, of which there were two, so we realised that we had to try those on and take a picture. We headed up to the fitting rooms, Caz with 2 items, me with 8, so she had to take a couple and we swapped once we got in there. I love trying on clothes in there... We had a lot of fun, and had I limitless money, I would have spent more on a few more things in there, but because I was getting one dress I wasn't going to get 2, and because I was getting one jumper, I wasn't going to get 2... Then we moved towards tills, but veered into the home section, and looked at all sorts, but didn't buy anything. I decided I wanted to look at snow boots because I wanted to compare prices to the Roxy snow boots I bought in August in TK Maxx that had no tag on them and I paid £25 for, because there was nothing similar so they made up a price for. (I reckon rrp is probably at least £65.) Then I got distracted by the snowwear... So I found a pair of trespass snow trousers, which are very cool, and actually fit me, unlike my tropical print ones. Yeah, so I dropped the belt, and wound up spending £100 on stuff. Hmmm.


Thing is, on Sunday morning, I woke up to a letter saying the government owed me almost £500! So I was happy enough to spend a little on myself... That's it though.


I do really really want to go a snow holiday though, a proper one, and learn to board.


I got back from shopping super late, because it was nearly 7pm or maybe after, I can't remember, when we left TK Maxx, and I got back to Caz's, stole her pliers and made my Christmas earrings, then left to go home and eat. Got in, made plans with my flatmate to go to the cinema tonight, went to bed fairly early, because...


I was working at 7.30am this morning. Horrible shift. I didn't read the function sheet, because it's not really my job, but I think from now on I'm going to read every detail of it, because there weren't enough chaffing dishes down, and there was someone there on a raw vegan diet, but the chefs didn't know about it... Slash didn't remember, so yeah, we had to do something for him in a rush. The whole thing had to go well because they represent so much money to the company, but the organiser was making strange requests, which weren't so much requests as orders. Such as... The lift wasn't to be in use (really? The chefs can't come up to the top kitchen to pick up supplies to prepare your lunch?! Really?!) The staff shouldn't be on the floor... Which meant that we couldn't set anything up until right on the breaktime, but I'm not sure what she expected, 20 staff to each bring out a dish and disappear?!? The ladder up to the loft was open (it's a listed building so our storage is very random and inconvenient, and the loft is usually open all the time.) and she had to have that closed, the heating turned up, and the rail of coats in front of our only access from the kitchen to the floor because there was a draft coming from the loft. Even though it can't have made much difference.

She asked me, when I first went out on the floor at lunchtime, when we realised that we were allowed out again, if that was the last of the food coming out, but I was lighting the chaffing dish lights to prepare for bringing the food out, and she hadn't given us the go ahead, these things run late all the time with other groups, so we never go with anything until we get the go ahead, or we're actually on the floor to follow what's going on to be able to prepare. Then, as I was carrying food out, and rushing up into the loft when I was allowed up into it to bring down the extra chaffing dishes, and the only other staff member in the auditorium was serving the food, she asked about a meal for someone on a raw vegan diet and said she had emailed the event co-ordinator about it. Who had been there to ensure the event went off without a hitch, but left before lunch... So I had to radio the kitchen, find out that he knew nothing about it, then take in her angry tone as she requested to speak to the manager and the chef about it, and (very briefly) showed me a list of what he could eat, but couldn't give me the sheet of paper for whatever reason, she also explained that he had planned to bring his own lunch, but she had organised something for him, and was very disappointed.

I have never encountered anyone who was making such inconsiderate demands before! It should have been a straightforward service of tea and coffee and breakfast rolls and lunch, and it would have all been on time had she not requested that we stay out of the auditorium while the conference leaders were speaking. We were stuck in the kitchen for over an hour at one point, bored out of our skulls, unable to do anything for fear of making noise, and even unable to go for a pee!

There was one thing that went wrong that I would have been annoyed at, had I been her, (the projector playing up) and one partially, but I would have been organised enough to mention when I arrived about all those little out-of-the-ordinary requests (like raw vegan!) in time for them to be organised on the morning if there's been a small communication error. Everything else were problems that were created by other demands that are just not normal for that kind of thing. We're fairly respectful, not going to make a lot of noise as we carry out odd jobs for them, but it wasn't really feasible. It was intimidating.

The problems were: Projector switching off every 10 minutes; Coffee brewing too loud; Staff on floor rather than hiding like second class citizens; Chef using the lift (most discreet means of access to upper kitchen); Lunch out 2 minutes late because we weren't notified (almost all organisers can see if we're getting prepared or give a warning, nothing's clockwork on either side, but we were actually ready with the food early, and couldn't bring it out); Vegan dinner not organised (Chefs are informed, but the sheet they receive on the morning doesn't detail that (why?! No idea!)); A lift maintenance man using the back stairs and crossing the front of the stage because he arrived in, informed the bar staff that he was there to sort out the kitchen lift, but neglected to tell them that meant upstairs, not down to the main kitchen... So he wandered right across the conference; Another chef not being told by the first to go up to the top kitchen and doing the same thing as earlier (that one was irresponsible, when he knew how pernickerty she was!)


I left work and went for a pint, chatted a bit, accidentally didn't realise that identical twins were sisters because they're really not all that identical anymore, and they have different mannerisms and different colour hair, and I'm quite embarrassed by that one, but never mind.


Got home, organised that we were going to see 50/50 at the cinema, sat and chatted, went out, great film, Cried. Came home and got into bed and have been sitting on my computer for far too long. Mostly on facebook, then writing this, and getting distracted looking at ski clothes on ebay (to go with my new trousers) then looking at my purchase history to find the shop I bought from before, only to be distracted by irregular choice shoes.

Ho hum. That was rather long. I should go to sleep now. I can't remember if I'm working at 5pm or 6pm tomorrow. I think 6, but maybe I should err on the side of caution for that one. Hmmmm.

I have one day off next week, but I haven't seen the rota yet. Annoying.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Wed Dec 07, 2011 08:06 AM
After yesterday and posting all the update info I wanted to come back and read it and figure out stuff.

The film made me think that I should really grab what I can from life. We all have a chance of 1 of death, it's just that if you chance that to death in the next 5 years, it changes. I wonder what my current chances are of that? Or of living until I'm 80 or beyond??

You know, when I watched "Bridge to Terabithia", I was looking forward to a kids movie that is one of the few that made [a friend] cry. So when it actually came to the sad part, that was so unexpected that the tears hit me as a shock, and the thoughts that ran through my head reminded me of my cousin Liam, and people who die before fulfilling everything they could and should have. With 50/50, it was advertised as a funny, and it turned out to be a slightly more deep and meaningful. It was really good, and it made me think about where I'm going with my life. It showed how at the beginning, he was in a relationship, but she wasn't right for him, and I thought about how I don't want to be in a relationship that I'm only in for the sake of it. I thought about how I want to spend more time with someone I know, in the hope that it might turn into something more.

With work, I need to act like I'm more in charge than I am. Act like I have more responsibility than I do. That is all.

French flatmate wants us all to cook dinner together on my one night off next week... So while I like that idea, I really wish I could make my own plans. Maybe? Nah... I think it will be lovely to have a wee night in and cook and eat. Though I do wish I could catch up with my friends.

Looking forward to next year, I think it will be a good year.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Fri Dec 09, 2011 06:55 PM
Had an ok shift tonight, but it ended weirdly.

I walked into the kitchen, and there were 3 people round the corner polishing cutlery, one of them a supervisor whose twin sister works with us. The other day, the twin was helping out to set up, and confused me with what needed to be on the tables, so I moved a lot slower than I could have and should have because I honestly had no idea that we needed all that cutlery and all those glasses on the tables. (Downstairs we put out rolled up cutlery and beermats, upstairs it's 2 or 3 course meal settings, this was downstairs with upstairs settings.) Anyway, obviously the twin told the supervisor about it (the twin works on reception) and I overheard her talking about it to 2 other members of staff tonight. I didn't hang around to hear what was being said, but I'm sure it wasn't flattering.

It's weird, I know that day went badly wrong, it was one thing after another, but a few of the things were because people turned up ridiculously late, and the kitchen were left struggling to put food together after they'd thought they were finished and thrown food out. There were a lot of us on, but there were two of us looking after that section and that big group, and a manager, but I find a lot of the time too many cooks spoil the broth in that place. Anyway, I think everyone blames each other for failings in there. So I'm going to take responsibility for fecking up a large portion of that day. However, it upsets me that she thought it appropriate to discuss failings of previous days with other members of staff. I heard her mention me by name. I think I should ask her about it, when it's quieter. You think???

There was another incident, where I stood back to let some customers through a small gap between other people, that was big enough for one person, and someone stopped halfway, and tried to get me to go through, but I refused because there wasn't enough room. It would have been much easier had he just walked the two steps and let me have enough space to walk through. But no, he insisted, and I kept (politely) refusing, then he began to grab my arms to let me through, and I really really really wanted to shout don'ttouchme! Because I can't stand when people do things like that. I can choose when to move, and you can't force me. But to stop him from grabbing me again, I had to squeeze through, and my breasts pushed right up against him. I felt so violated. He basically forced me to get into such close physical proximity that it was easier to allow him than appear rude. I actually almost cried, it was awful. The thing is, I get that close to customers a lot of the time, and it doesn't bother me, but this was chest to chest, and avoidable, but forced.

Spoiler: Show
One of my first nights out with the people I worked with back home I got very drunk (too drunk) because I'd not eaten a lot, not drank in over a month, and was keeping pace with a girl I was sharing rounds with.

The next week, one of my co-workers came up to me, and informed me that he had a girlfriend, and told me that some of our other co-workers told him that what he did with me was rape.

I'm starting to believe it was true. I don't think he realised it at the time, probably because I did find him attractive, and wasn't resisting, but I would have if I had had less to drink. I know that he was truly sorry, and he really will think in future about sleeping with people in that state, but there you go.

My sexual encounters in the past have some not very pleasant experiences. There was one who kicked me out because I made him stop. He kept trying to pressure me, but when I refused, he kicked me out. It was horrific.

Anyway, that incident happened right before I overheard the conversation in the kitchen. All in the last hour of my shift. I felt horrific. It was just a pants end to the night. Which didn't go too badly, but again, I was up shit creek and my paddle had a distinctly dodgy handle.


But not really.

My life's ok, I need to turn it around.

I think what I need to do with the people in work, is to work hard to convince people that I know what's going on, and really be switched on. I can do it, I think first impressions and peoples' now preconceptions of me need to be challenged. It will be hard work, but I am going to convince them that I am not a shit waitress, and I know how to carry out simple tasks without doing ballsy things. Oh well, nevermind about tonight. Tomorrow is another day, and I am going to do much better. I need to decide whether to bring that up with the supervisor or not, and choose a good moment. I like her, she's a nice person, but that has changed my opinion of her, and I think I need to find out if I've got the wrong end of the stick as well.

I really wish I could get a better paid job, with more set hours, so I can actually plan to have a life, and save, and actually be able to live like I'm in my mid-20s, and not still feel like I'm in this limbo in between state, not really sure where I'm going next.


You know something, the title of this diary is "Let's see what happens next..." It's very apt. I do want to see what happens next, I'm very interested. I think I'm best letting it happen, not pushing too much, applying for jobs as I see them, working hard with what I'm at. And hoping for a love life to come along when it can. What I really need to do on that score is to find out or try to figure out if that boy I think I like maybe thinks he likes me back. I need to organise more social events with him though, I think that's the only way to do it.

Anyway, I'm working at 3pm tomorrow, I want to get up at about 9.30 or 10, so I can have a semi-productive day, at least.

re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Dec 10, 2011 06:29 AM
My internets are getting switched off in the next 24 hours until Wednesday. Poo.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By GingerPremium member
On Sat Dec 10, 2011 12:45 PM
(((hugs)))Sorry you had a rough night. For what it's worth, I think it was totally out of line for the supervisor girl to be talking about your performance with other employees, unless one of them is the manager or something, and even then it should have happened in a room with a closed door.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sun Dec 11, 2011 12:15 AM

Busy busy night tonight. Went better for me personally, but still not great. I stayed until close, and I was due to finish at 1am. I'm in at 3pm tomorrow.

Anyway, thanks. I think I shall speak to her soon, maybe, Depends how soon it is I'll see her. Might just chicken out.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Puss_in_Bootsmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sun Dec 11, 2011 01:44 PM
I hope you don't chicken out. That was so rude of her!

That other unpleasant incident was strange too. I'd be really creeped out, so I don't think you're being over-the-top for being upset, especially given previous experiences you've had. *hugs*
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Wed Dec 14, 2011 11:13 PM
Haven't chickened out, but haven't seen her, and has pretty much forgotten about it. Think I'll just leave it. I was bothered about it because I'd had a pants night, but I'm not bothered any more, I don't even think she could have been talking about me in a bad way, just in an "I was there" way... hmmm. She must have been, but only implied. I was just ready to go home before I heard that, and that had been a shitty day, so to hear her talk about it, then say my name, automatically made me feel like crap. Anyway. Will have to leave it, it's been too long now.

As for the other experience, I've written that one off as someone who really has no concept of personal space, and didn't realise that he was being the opposite of polite by trying to let me past. Just a drunken idiot.

As for other shifts since then, everything's been going well... Had really sore wrists today, more my left than right, which is weird, since I carry plates up my right arm much more often than my left, but anyway.

Finished at 3am, then went to the casino for one drink, and it's 06.11. I did only have one drink, but we were chatting, and the girl I was with drank really slowly. Annoying. I didn't really really want to go either, I could have quite happily gone home to bed.

I need to do stuff tomorrow, and that's looking particularly unlikely... Poo!!!!

Right, off to bedtime. Sleepys.ish.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Dec 17, 2011 08:20 AM
Lost voice is not fun on Black Friday.

Am working at 5pm today, had my friend visit me here, because I didn't want to/couldn't go out in case my voice got worse, and have been whispering all day. She brought me groceries, not the quite the mulled wine and Christmas markets expedition I was hoping for, but nonetheless, we had good craic.

re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Dec 17, 2011 11:28 PM
My voice sort of came back. I went to work. It lasted half an hour. Arrggghgghghhghghghhhhhhh

Anyway, about the supervisor talking about me... I worked with her tonight, perfect opportunity to bring it up, but she couldn't hear me, and was lip reading. I didn't bring it up.

I'm glad I didn't. I think I got the wrong end of the stick. She and I haven't really worked together much, and she's actually lovely, and I don't know, she might even have been mentioning that it was me and her sister on set up, and it could have been as innocent as that. I'm no longer annoyed. Let sleeping dogs lie. I don't even think I was annoyed in the first place that she thought that, more that she shared that, but I'm not even sure that she did. No matter, I'm good. I've proved myself.

I'm relatively tipsy, after 2 half pints of cider and blackcurrant. Wow. That's a records.

Everyone I work with is brilliant craic, I'd love to be trained on the bar as well as the floor so I can do anything, because while in most places I think floor staff get more chance to get to know each other, in my current work, I think it's the bar staff that are tighter.

I just really wish that tempers weren't on such short fuses in there... Miscommunications because no one could understand my whispers meant a few things were blown out of proportion. Oh well, never mind. Sorted now.
re: Lets see what happens next...
By Emmamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Tue Dec 20, 2011 07:32 PM
So my last post was Saturday night...

Sunday I was supposed to meet Kathryn at 1pm for lunch, and work at 5pm. I got in very very late (and posted that reply) then tried to sleep, and couldn't, with a painful throat (it got painful every time I lay down!) So I text her and re-scheduled for Monday 5pm... I knew I was supposed to be off all day Monday.

I woke up at twenty to eleven, with the Glaswegian manager on the phone, telling me when I answered that I sounded so much better, and my voice was completely back and I sounded fantastic and didn't I remember how he was my favourite manager and I was his favourite member of floor staff...

He wanted me in for 12, or half past if I couldn't make it... He knew I was ill, but someone else had phoned in sick and he really needed someone, and please could I come in. After me planning on spending most of the day resting in bed! I said yes.

To re-cap:

Croaky voice Thursday on day off/shopping day.
Completely lost voice on Friday, on busiest day of year. It returned after my break, but went again, and I might have stayed a little later than my 11pm finish time, I can't remember.
Saturday instead of going out, Caz came to see me, brought me food, I whispered all day to conserve voice, and lost it within half an hour of arriving into work. Proceeded to stay until 5am, instead of rostered 2am finish time....
Cancelled meet up with Kathryn on Sunday and was called into work early.

So I took my time, and turned up for work at half past 12, and glaswegian manager loved me... I worked pretty well, with the croaky voice, that came and went as follows: croaky; lost; croaky; normal. Weird... no rest, it just appeared back.

I managed to get out of work early at 11.15pm, and we headed for a drink or few... then I lost my voice again, but I did only have 3 drinks.


Monday was my day off.


Monday morning I woke up to my phone ringing at 11.59am. Work. "So sorry to call on your day off, but is there any chance you can come in, because another waitress is in who really shouldn't be in work, can you come in?!"


So I negotiated. Said I had plans at 5pm, but I could come in... He said they'd pay for a taxi and if I could get there as soon as I could. I told him I was still in bed, had to shower, but would do my best. So that's bed, to work... in half an hour, and it's 10 minutes travel time in a taxi. Which they did pay for.

I think they pretty much love me now. Especially as we worked really hard that shift, the supervisor on shift hadn't had a day off in ages either. Every single table left 10% tips, which is exceptional work when there were only 3 of us on the floor, and the barman was the general manager of the building and disappeared every so often to do important things, and we took about £600... I remember taking the bill for one table, they gave me a twenty quid note as a tip (their bill was just over £200) and I went into the kitchen, and danced about to the dodgy Christmas music showing the supervisor the nice purple note before putting it in the tip jar.

A while later, I was in the kitchen, round the corner, polishing cutlery and wrapping cutlery. With my back to the corner round which the tips are/were kept. I heard some tips being dropped in the jar, and I kept working away. When I was done, I put away the wrapped cutlery, and then the two of us that were due to split tips went to the jar and she mentioned that manager had said that most tables were leaving 10% and since we'd taken that, we should have bout £60... Then she asked as I was talking about something else random "Was there not a twenty pound note in here Emma?" Stop. What?!?!

Someone had been in the kitchen and taken the only purple note out of the jar. Of course we were going to notice. Dirty rotten thief!!! We knew there weren't many staff in the building, and cctv would show us who was in and out of the kitchen. (There are 3 floors and a kitchen on each, it's a listed building, so it kind of has to be that way, and storage is weird, so chefs and kitchen porters are in and out of all 3 all the time.)


I mean, it's only £7 to me once bar and kitchen tips are taken out, (10 and 20% respectively.) then split two ways, but it's the principal, especially since whoever it was was stupid enough to think we wouldn't notice! The only purple note in the jar, lots of fives, one twenty... He takes the twenty.

Anyway, I had to leave to meet Kathryn, but I wasn't in too sunny a mood, and off I went, stopped at Greggs, bought a yum yum, so that made me feel better.


Enjoyed my time with Kathryn, we had an excellent dinner, and some good milkshakes, and a bad one... We chatted, we exchanged gifts, and I showed her my flat, it was lovely, to actually have some social time in the middle of the Christmas madness.


This afternoon I was eating my breakfast (slept late, deservedly) and got a call saying I was supposed to be in at 12, but the last I checked my rota had said two, and it hadn't been up when I left work yesterday, so I figured if they were changing todays shift they would have called to let me know. Poo.

So they did love me, but now I'm back to whateversness. Ah well.

Then yesterdays supervisor came in, and told me that the general manager went to the kitchen, and told them that that £20 needed to be found within the next half hour, so it came out of the communal kitchen tips. Which means that whoever nicked it is up £18, which isn't very fair on the kitchen, but I'm sure they have an idea who did it, so I think he'll definitely think twice before trying that one again. So I got a little booster today by getting a full 50% of that because late tips generally just get split and don't get tipped out, because they're too lazy to mostly. Anyway, that was... bittersweet.


One thing that I will say is that I posted on facebook about the tips going missing, and that supervisor I was talking about before, she got really annoyed about it, and we had a full conversation under my status. She also mentioned recently that she hasn't worked with me that much, so I think she's realised that I heard, and is trying to atone, or she wasn't talking bad about me, or she was, but she's realised that I was just having an off day, or some other explanation, but whatever. No conclusions will be jumped to. She's nice, and I'm happy that I didn't bring it up with her.


So tomorrow I'm working at 11am, and the same on Thursday, and I go home on Friday, get the bus at 11am, but at some point I want to change some tickets I have, so I might have to get up super early to do that on Thursday or maybe Friday... Anyway, it's a ten hour shift tomorrow, and an eleven hour shift on Thursday, it was 10 today, a wee short 3 and a half yesterday, 8 on Sunday, 12 on Saturday, 11 on Friday... I've done a helluva lot of hours lately... Proud of myself.


To conclude... I'm not sure what's going to happen next, I like the place I'm working at, and my diary seems to be filled with it, because that's all ym life is at the minute, we'll see what happens after Christmas, but I enjoy this kind of work, and I'm happy with the hours I'm getting. I'll be saving so I don't have to worry about paying rent before my lease runs out, and see what way my hours go in the new year, because this being Christmas it makes it so much harder to judge. Life is pretty good at the minute. Professionally I have a job that I enjoy, albeit not a very well-paid one, personally I am seeing my friends, but not enough, and my love life is non-existant.. I've still not figured out if I'm interested in that boy, but I don't think he's interested in me in that way, so I should really let it go. And I've been having inappropriate thoughts about someone in work who has a girlfriend, who is also not probably conventionally attractive, but he has a beautiful voice, and there's something about his eyes and the way he smiles. Anyway, still trying to get over that. I have fake conversations in my head where I reject him, but I don't think that's helping, maybe I should be having fake conversations where he rejects me when I'm not coming onto him but he's so bigheaded that he thinks I am. I don't know. I just need to stop the inappropriate thoughts. There are plenty of guys out there, why do I happen to be attracted to the ones that aren't available? (available to me that is.)

We shall see what the new year brings.

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