I get really annoyed because every time I'm going potty- if someone needs something they walk right in the bathroom and ask. It's very annoying and when I express this my husband gets very angry. Seriously? Do I need any audience while I am taking a dump or changing my tampon? I think it is totally disgusting and inappropriate to bother someone when they are 'doing their business' in the bathroom. Am I the wrong one here?

It's not rude at all to ask for privacy. I grew up in a household with just my mom and I where we had one bathroom, often the door was left open anyways. We didn't just walk in when someone was using it but if no one is at that end of the house, I'm not going to close the door. My boyfriend and I also leave the doors open 9/10 times. If he's closed it though, I don't come in without knocking.

Can you just lock the door?

My daughter is especially bad about this. Or after I shower, she'll come in and start chatting. I mean come on, I'm trying to dry my crack here. Grrr.

Just lock the door. They'll still come to the door and talk to you but at least they can't barge in.

kk~

Lock the door if you don't want to be disturbed... Hubby and I usually have conversations while he is on the crapper... Doesn't bother me.

Now bath time... that you don't bother me during

Lock the door. I grew up in a house without locks on the bathroom doors because my genius of a brother decided to lock himself in one of the bathrooms when he was 2 years old and required a police officer to come and take the door off the hinges. But regardless of the fact that we couldn't lock the doors, it was well known that bathroom time was alone time. I've never walked in on a parent, nor have I been walked in on. Make it clear. Better late than never, I guess.

I think i missed something on the family situation. . .

But anyway - yes, we also don't have locks on the bathroom doors (house is too old) but no one would dream of coming in. Sure every once in a while some one isn't paying attention and walks in (and hurries out) and we do have conversations through the closed door sometimes too but never group chats in the bathroom!! I would just lay out that when you are in the bathroom with the door closed, that is a signal that you are not inviting company. Then when the situation comes up again say calmly and firmly "the door is closed, I will be out to talk to you in 5 mins".

Yeah, we live in an apartment and no locks on the bathroom doors.

My daughter has been getting better about it but my husband thinks that because we are married that he has every right to be up in my business while I'm doing my business. I find it disgusting. He doesn't care. He says that everyone in his family did it when he was growing up and he doesn't see the issue with it. My family was the exact opposite. It was actually a rule to shut and lock the bathroom door when you went in.

Wow the concept of someone being in the bathroom with me or just walking in is totally and utterly forgein. I lock the bathroom door always if I'm voiding anything, sometimes if I'm simply showering I will leave the door unlocked if my mother is feeling really sick, but she always knocks turns off the fan flicks the lights and lets me know that she needs the bathroom and it's an emergency (we only have one bathroom in my house), but even then we have a pretty thick printed shower curtin.

Bathroom time is totaly personal time as far as I'm concerned.

My fiance is a lot more private about what goes on in the bathroom than I am, but that's okay. If I try to talk to him while he's doing his business, even through a closed door, it makes him REALLY uncomfortable, so I just don't do it. I think his right to go to the bathroom in privacy trumps my "right" to talk to him while he's in there. Very rarely has there ever been anything I needed to tell him that was so urgent that it couldn't wait 5 or 10 minutes.

I don't think you're in the wrong at all.

Is there anything you could do like change the doorknobs to ones that lock? What about buying a rubber doorstop to put on the inside...it wouldn't necessarily stop people from coming in, but it would make it more difficult, and maybe discourage them.

I tend to have a flair for the dramatic, so I might do something like announce that I have to go to the bathroom, so I'm going to go down to the corner gas station where I know I can have some privacy--"See ya in 10 minutes". And I'd probably keep it up for quite some time if I wasn't promised privacy.

However, should that approach not be for you, have you told hubby that it doesn't matter that HE thinks it's appropriate, the fact that YOU don't think it's appropriate is all he needs to know and observe? It's like sex--it doesn't matter how much one person wants to do it, until they have the consent of the other person...it should not happen.

I grew up in a family where only under the most extreme of circumstances would you interrupt someone in the bathroom, and even then, it's a knock and perhaps crack the door a cm so that voices will carry clearly and the matter can be resolved quickly. The idea of that time being open for other's viewing is very unsettling. Luckily, BF's family was the same way and we haven't run into this problem.

Eew, that's gross and douchey to just ignore your feelings on the subject.

I don't like being bothered in the bathroom...heck, I can barely stand public toilets when somebody else is in there, ugh.

Get one of those door security sticks that lodge under the doorknob. That way hubby has no choice in the matter.

For the few bucks that it might cost to buy a new door handle... maybe get one with a lock.

Tumble, does your apartment rules prevent you from changing the knob to one that locks? I know some places don't allow any changes. Some places have codes about that sort of thing (something to do with preventing kids from being locked in the bathroom?). Anyway, that's why the stick thing is good. No changes or damage. And you can use it other places - it's great for travel.

You don't even need a fancy new handle or that pole type thing. Just get a hook and eye lock. Probably very cheap, easy to install, perfectly sufficient for your needs.

I hope I'm not speaking out of turn here, but if your husband gets mad when you tell him you don't want him in the bathroom, isn't he going to be even MORE pissed if he tries to walk in & finds you've locked the door?

If he gets mad, don't you back down, tumble!! He needs to get the idea that you mean business and that YOU has the final decision on YOUR OWN personal privacy. Really, this should be totally out of his hands, he should not be able to even have an opinion on it. This is your body, your life - Lol, I know that sounds dramatic when we are talking about bathroom behavior but this honestly gets me pretty mad. YOU should be able to to decide and no one else. End of.

Hug~

^^ I think what I'm trying to say is that I see this as a control issue that runs deeper than who's in the bathroom when she's pooping. I mean, she's literally DISGUSTED by this, and he doesn't give a rat's?

Some people equate this sort of thing with intimacy ie: I can fart in front of you because I am comfortable with you and we have no secrets. Maybe that is where he is coming from.

I draw the line at toilet functions. Tell him when you are old he may need to change your diaper so he should be happy you are keeping him in the dark about these things for now! A lady must have SOME mystery.

I do not usually bother my fiance while he is on the can. If I have to go in for something, I knock and ASK. The answer is usually yes. Same with me, if he needs something, he asks. It doesn't bother me, but that's me, everyone is different. Not knocking or asking before just coming in is rude.

I agree with Lux. Based on what you are saying here (that he feels he has the "right" to walk in on you because you're his wife) and what you've said about him at other times, I think this is more of a control issue than anything else. So with that being the case, I'm not sure what the best advice would be. On the one hand, having a controlling husband who will not even let you use the bathroom in private is not something you should have to deal with, and I think you would have every right to install a lock, security stick, etc, to ensure that your private time remains private. But at the same time, I worry what his reaction would be to you doing something like that. If it's just going to make him angrier to the point that he is going to yell at you through the door nonstop every time you go in there... well, I won't say it wouldn't be worth it, because that's up to you to decide. But it's a difficult situation in any case.

We have a 100% privacy policy. I have NEVER been in the bathroom while my husband is using the toilet and vice versa. We have just finished training Elijah to close the door every time he goes as he's old enough now to not need any assistance.

Helen

I never get a break either... My 4 year old son has now thought my almost 2 year old daughter to open the door, and she is tied to my hip. i just keep telling myself that no where in the near future will I have a break and I have to get over it. I did it to my Mommy and it has not come back to me. It's called Karma lol

We also have that 100% privacy policy.

However, in a Stockholm restaurant (Rolfs Kök - great place!), we found this bathroom (see picture).