Forum: Adults / Baby On Board

Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...
By PogMoGilliesmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Aug 27, 2011 07:50 PM

Now that Alex has hit four months, I'm finding myself more and more amused by the advice and opinions offered by the parents around me.

A few examples:
"He's 4 months? he may be ready to go down to just one nap a day. My daughter wouldn't sleep at night if she even got 10 minutes of a nap during the day"

"4 months already? How is he sleeping" (not so well,thanks) "really? he should be sleeping through the night by now!" (gee, thanks)

"4 months? That's when my kid stopped sleeping. Get ready to carry him and walk the floor all night"

"4 months? So are you going to start food yet?"

They are all well-intentioned, but most times I simply nod and smile.

what are the bits of advice you've been handed lately?

7 Replies to Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...

re: Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...
By LlamaLlamaDuckmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Aug 27, 2011 09:05 PM
My mother in law thinks I should take Teresa to the doctors for everything... she's 14 months old and only has 2 teeth. She thinks that there is something wrong with her. I asked the dentist when I went in and she said not to worry.

My mother in law also wants to keep spoonfeeding her... I refuse to do so. I give her bite size easy to gum food (like chicken etc...) and she gums away at it no problem, no choking. But MIL is terrified to do so. I prefer her to feed herself.
re: Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...
By hummingbird
On Sat Aug 27, 2011 09:33 PM
Don't even listen, smile sweetly and agree with them that darling Amelia is quite normal to be quoting Homer at 6 months and Alex read War and Peace last week together with studying quantum physics.

Yep, you got it, most of what they're saying is bragging, it never happened or the one nap in a day happened once and it really never happened ever again after that one day.

Ignore them and listen to Alex, he knows what's best for him and so do you, you're the one that sees him every day 24/7 and they don't!

I rest my case.
re: Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...
By Theresamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sat Aug 27, 2011 10:10 PM
Oy. The queen advice giver in my family was my one aunt, and once she got her own grandbaby, the "help" tapered off.

The one that takes the cake in the "No, really, what did she just say?!" category is her telling me that James would have to be put in casts. She saw him about a week after he started walking, and he walked with his toes turned in. She told me they were going to put him in casts.

Just for the curiosity, I mentioned it to his pediatrician at his one year physical, and she burst out laughing, and went "Nobody has put a kid in casts in 30 years!"

Gee, thanks, Aunt. That was helpful. *facepalm*

For the offensive category, that one goes to telling me that I was "all but abusing James" for having him wear shorts and a t-shirt (now, wait for it...) on a day when it was 85 degrees outside. I think anything BUT letting him wear shorts and a t-shirt would have been abuse!

The older he got, the more her helpful gems started to taper off, and then she got her own grandbaby and they've all but stopped now. She still pops up with one every now and again, but she's pretty well over that. Either that, or she's stopped saying those things to me, and just complains about me to other people. Lol...
re: Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...
By ChristinePremium member
On Sat Aug 27, 2011 10:21 PM
Smile sweetly and do as you please.

If that fails, say, "I've never heard that before. I'll have to ask her doctor."


The real conversation stopper is to just say, "I KNOW!" No matter how crazy, and just ignore it.

My MIL gave me the most intrusive ignorant advice. It took three of four kids for me to learn to let it go in one ear and out the other. I'd just say, "Thanks. I'll have to think about trying it." or even better, "I've found that all my kids are different."

Hang in there.

xoxo

Keep On Dancing*
re: Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...
By PogMoGilliesmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sun Aug 28, 2011 10:51 AM
I find that most of the time I can give a neutral "hmmm," and go on with my day. Where I get touchy is when people give me a hard time about naps and sleeping, since Alex will take good naps, both morning and afternoon, and will be a happy baby before bedtime when he does. However, when he gets short (less than 1 hour, though it's better when he goes closer to 2 hours)naps, he is a miserable, cranky baby before bed.

I don't care how your baby slept. This is how my baby sleeps (or doesn't as the case may be).

Oh well. All I can say is that we seem to have successfully moved bed time from 10 pm to 7-8 pm, and he is settling down to sleeping longer chunks again.

And your child that slept through the night from 6 weeks on? Well, bully for you! :P
re: Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...
By Queen_Jojo
On Sun Aug 28, 2011 06:11 PM
We have a neighbour whose baby does everything before Paige, even though she is 3 months younger! Her daughter came out with the ability to read and write 23 languages if what she tells us is true!
What you'll find is behind closed doors, the good advice givers have the slowest non sleeping kids ever, but cover up with the "advice" to make them selves feel better.
There is no such thing as an average child who meets every milestone on time

Queenie xx
re: Everyone has an opinion, everyone has advice...
By oz_helenmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Mon Aug 29, 2011 05:08 AM
Oh don't I remember it well. I guess I was fortunate in that my family were all interstate so I didn't have them all in my face about what I was doing wrong.

Apparently though, I'm still doing everything wrong and Elijah is closing in on 5 and a half.

Helen

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