So, I have a huge scar that goes from my left side close to my spine over to the start of my ribs/ front side. The scar is from life-saving heart surgery I had 15 years ago, and it is still very visible. The scar itself is a White line, and there are little lines that are also White on the top an bottom of the scar. It bugs me when people touch it randomly(yea weird, I know, it creeps me out but anyway,) and ask where I got it from and when I say 'heart surgery' their eyes go all wide an they just say 'oh' or 'OMG!'. I kind of like it since it makes me unique and reminds me how lucky I am to be alive when the odds were on me dying more likely than surviving. But I don't like the pity looks I get when I explain how I got it, how it shows when I wear bikinis, tank tops, dance costumes/practice clothes, etc. I asked my mum if bio oil would get rid of it or fade it but she says since it was sewn with real thread and a needle that it will never go away unless I get surgery to have it removed? I don't know if I should keep it or not. Oh, and I'm 15. Help please, ladies?

I don't think there's such thing as surgery to remove a scar? Try the Bio Oil. It won't make it vanish but it had minimised the appearance of lots of my little scars. I don't think it matters how it was stitched, either.

That sounds really strange to me, I was not aware you could get rid of scars. But honestly, even if you could, it's not worth it. I have a massive scar across my belly, just above my belly button, from life-saving surgery I had when I was a baby. So when I wear a bikini etc it's pretty obvious, but honestly, who cares?? It's just a scar, it's really no big deal. Keep it as a momento of something that you went through

Scars are souvenirs you never lose.

Yeah, I'm not sure how surgery could get ride of a scar. I'd think it could only get worse that way. If you use the Bio Oil you might be able to get it to fade so it's less noticeable.

I'm curious what makes people think it's okay to "randomly touch" a scar on your chest? Have they no concept of personal space? A bit rude.

Yes, a plastic surgeon can get rid of scars by doing surgery. You originally get the scar because you are stitched up, tight, so that you can best recover from the injury or operation. As your body heals, it forms tough, strong scar tissue which, of course, looks different from the rest of your skin. As I understand it (and I'm not an expert on this), the plastic surgeon is able to remove the scar tissue then close up the resulting wound with the skin held together more gently, with less stress, so that the body heals you up with regular skin tissue rather than forming another scar.

But is it worth it? If the scar were across your face and prevented you from, say, smiling normally, of course the answer would be "Yes". But plastic surgery is expensive; so personally, I'd try the Bio Oil. You might want to confer with a plastic surgeon, though, to discuss the likelihood of success in your case, what the cost would be, recovery period, etc., then make a decision.

Irish4life wrote:

It bugs me when people touch it randomly(yea weird, I know, it creeps me out but anyway,) and ask where I got it from and when I say 'heart surgery' their eyes go all wide an they just say 'oh' or 'OMG!'.

AS IT SHOULD. If people touch it, you are well within your rights to say "I didn't give you permission to touch me." or something of the nature. At the very least as they step towards you to try and touch it, step away to stay out of your reach.
You shouldn't have to suffer silently because your peers haven't learned manners or self-control.

Also, you don't HAVE to tell them what it is. After all if you tell them and they always display pity, which you don't like, why not just say "It's no big deal." or "It's not your business." You can tell them when you are in a kind or relation ship where you can say "I'll tell you, but I hate getting pity so if you react with pity I'm outta here, got it?"

I kind of like it since it makes me unique and reminds me how lucky I am to be alive when the odds were on me dying more likely than surviving. But I don't like the pity looks I get when I explain how I got it, how it shows when I wear bikinis, tank tops, dance costumes/practice clothes, etc.

Tell people you don't want their pity. In cases like this, people react for two major reason: because they are uncomfortable and have to revert to sadness, or because they are afraid of seeming callous and thus feel like they have to over express sadness or pity. If you do tell them it's from surgery, think of saying "I had a surgery when I was a baby" instead of just "heart surgery", and feel free to tell them "There's no use feeling bad for me or anything, I don't even remember it and I've always had the scar...it's always been a part of me, and I kinda like it. If anything, be jealous!"

I'm not an expert but I have looked into scar improvment treatment options. My daughter has a large scar on her arm. She was burned in a kitchen accident about six years ago. She has also struggled with the rudeness of others, sometimes perfect strangers with their stares and questions. She now likes to tell people she saved a baby from a burning building. They usually don't know what to say after that. A simple "wow" from them and they move on and we roll our eyes. It's terribly rude for people to touch you or comment on it or even stare. That reflects badly on them.

Scar 'removal' treatments are more complex than you may realize. There are new less invasive treatments such as chemical peels and steroid injections. As well as the traditional reduction and skin grafts. But it improves the appearance only, the scar does not comepletely go away. There are topical treatments scuh as Bio Oil or Mederma.

And if it's a raised keloid scar, such as my daughter's, those are the hardest to improve, because keloid scarring is something that's going on in your own body chemistry as it heals. Some people are prone to keloid scarring, some never will have one.

If the scar really concerns you, I suggest you consult a dermatologist who can go over your options with you. The you can decide what you want to do. You will probably start with the least invasive procedure and proceed from there.

kk~

Kandykane- I'm pretty sure it's a keloid scar. one time, I asked my close friend if I should get it removed, and apparently she thinks it makes me look 'brave' or something, I don't really remember what she said. She told me to tell people I got it from fighting somebody off or something like that. But I moved away to a new city so thus starts the looks and explaining/lack thereof as the case may be. Hmm, if anyone asks me again, which I know they will, I'll just say nothing, but people seem to expect an answer for why it's there once they've seen it, and that's really annoying. Kind of like that look that says 'aren't ya gonna tell me where it came from?' no I'm not! This girl who was in my gym class would come up behind me an touch It and I told her not to but she didnt listen. She didn't like me much, either.

It may not be keloid, it may be hypertrophic. Keloid scars tend to be discolored and continue to grow over time. You say your scar is white. Regardless, either type is caused by an over production of collagen. Talk with a dermatologist about your options. We have had consultations but no procedures yet because my daughter went through so much pain at the time of the injury and during the healing process that she is wary of any treatment that may involve pain. You may wish to look into laser treatments although results can vary and treatments are often not covered by insurance.

Now, as for these people bugging you, you need to stand up for yourself and tell them to mind their own business and keep their hands to themselves. I am appalled at the way people act sometimes!! I'm serious - do not let them get away with treating you like that! Report them to the office at school, it is bullying and you should not have to endure it.

kk~

Kandykane-

I will do what you suggested and tell somebody. I'm a survivor, I think I can try and be the mature one in this situation. It's not my fault I have one an they don't, some people are so rude and have no respect for me or consider my feelings and it makes me so mad! It's one part of me, not everything!!

I had a client of mine that had scar revision surgery on her neck (she had thyroid cancer I think)... and to be quite honest the scar ended up worse than it was orgininally.

From what I understand is basically they cut out the original scar, and than basically sew up the new incision.

It would be worth going in to see a plastic surgeon and seeing what your options are, but basically you will have that scar forever, it just might be that you may be able to soften it up a bit.

I have a four inch long scar, that's 3/8 an inch thick at the widest point right besides my knee. It's noticeable if I'm wearing shorts or skirts. I got it when I was three. The Story of Suma's Scar (aka My Mom Is A Saint) goes like this:

My dad was in the garage working on the car when he saw a towel slipping. He reached out to grab it and in the process got the tip of middle finger sliced off. So one trip to the hospital later, my mom sets him up on the sleeper sofa. It was navy blue with flowers. So while my dad is drugged up on painkillers, I'm setting up house underneath. I had my blankie and my doggy and other toys in my newly discovered fort. My mom calls me out and reach down to pick me up and I crawl to the right side and reach up to her and slip and fall (I've always been impeccably clumsy) and slice my leg open on the exposed and sharp black metal tubing of the sofa. Mom mom grabs me up and puts a wash cloth on it and runs me next door and makes a trip to the emergency room for the second time in two days. It took over 30 stitches to close it up and my scar remains to this day.

I always like to see people cringe when I tell the story. I also make sure to point out that as huge as the scar is on me as an adult, to imagine a 4 inch long scar on a three year olds leg. That also gets a great look of horror.

But yeah, if you don't want to tell people about your scar, don't. If you want to tell them it was a Velociraptor (which is totes what I would do) then tell them that. Yeah when I was little I was hiding in the kitchen and these Velociraptors kept trying to get me and my brother, one ran straight at us but it knocked itself out when it banged into the metal sliding doors that we were reflected in. Yes it's a scene from Jurassic Park, but where do you think they got the idea from? Yeah. But I wouldn't get the scar removed, it is a part of you.

I had bunion surgery on BOTH of my feet. So I have very VERY ugly scars. And since I'm a dancer, people see my feet. A lot. So yes, at first, I was very self-conscious. But as time went on, it actually helped me. When I look at my feet now, instead of seeing ugly scars, I see strength. The fact that I have been able to progress so much after having surgery is inspiring to me, and to others as well (my friend is always telling me how my feet are signs of strength and perserverence). You see, I lost almost all the flexibility in my big toes, which is really needed for dancers. But seeing those scars and being frustrated by them in the beginning only made me push myself harder to regain that strength and flexibility in my toes.

So in my opinion, keep your scar

Thank you all for your ideas/comments/opinions, I really appreciate it. I have all the info I need.

Mods, you can lock this now if you wish to.