Forum: Advice / Support

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Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaired"
By Heartmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Fri Dec 16, 2011 03:55 PM

So I'm really not doing well right now and I decided that things are bad enough that I need to be in an inpatient facility. I don't feel like getting into it at the moment but I've been in the game long enough to know that's what I need.

I called up and did a phone intake for the facility I want to go to. Basically I am completely lacking any sort of self-care. I'm not eating, sleeping (and when I do I've reversed my sleep cycle), showering, taking my medications, or going to school or work. At the moment things are still being worked out with school but I may have failed at least one of my classes this semester. I missed a traffic court appointment, and I can't keep any sort of appointments otherwise. I'm not actively suicidal or SI-ing yet, but I'd rather not wait until I am.

Well, intake said that I am not "grossly impaired" and they don't think insurance would authorize me for inpatient treatment. Specifically, unless I have lost weight or am actively suicidal (i.e. "put me in the damn hospital or I am going to off myself"), they really don't think insurance will admit me. (By the way I have a history of past hospitalization...) They referred me to their intensive outpatient program. I pointed out that I was not able to go to school or work, why the hell did they think I would be able to attend an IOP program? I'm pretty obviously not capable of that. Didn't matter.

I don't have an intake appointment yet (by the time I woke up this afternoon, admission had closed) but I'm debating whether or not to lie and say I am actively suicidal or just yell at everyone until I get the treatment I need. I'm pretty furious, because it's pretty damn clear that I do need to be inpatient, considering the fact that when left to my own devices I simply won't eat and have absolutely zero support from anyone in my household (i.e. my parents are content with letting me not eat).




...this is sort of a vent/please tell me nice things. I'm trying to get help and I can't?!? Everyone would rather wait until I AM a danger to myself or others?? If you have anything nasty to say please keep it to yourself, preferably shoved up your rectal cavity. kthx.

31 Replies to Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaired"

re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By majeremember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Fri Dec 16, 2011 04:00 PM
I'm sorry. Insurance companies are evil.

*hug*
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By kandykanePremium member
On Fri Dec 16, 2011 04:11 PM
"They don't think." Well, that's a maybe, then, not a no.

Take this into consideration. If you go, the worst thing would be the insurance won't pay. You'd still get treatment. Thy cannot deny you treatment. If you don't go, what's the worst that could happen? You'll get worse.

So, I'd say take the chance on a big bill. You can always make payments, later, if it comes to that.

kk~
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By imadanseurPremium member
On Fri Dec 16, 2011 04:14 PM
I don't know that lying is the best way, but if it was me...I'd be thinking about it. Can your doctor/psychologist recommend the inpatient therapy? Here in Arizona I think that would work.

It's not necessarily the insurance companies that are evil, part of the problem is now "Obama Care." It really has changed A LOT of things in the insurance world and mostly not for the better. (However that belongs on the debate board right?)
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By Heartmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Fri Dec 16, 2011 04:28 PM
The bill would go to my folks not to me, so I might talk to them about risking it. I don't know what they'd say - they seem to be of the opinion that I'm just lazy, not sick. Which makes about as much sense as holding a rock concert in the vacuum of outer space.

Insurance didn't have any trouble paying the bills in the past so I doubt there would be any problems with it now. I could try getting into the more local facility but they lied to me and my family about my diagnosis the last time I attended so I REALLY don't want to go there. Though I could try other places.

The problem now is of course I'm in such a bad state that MY trying to take care of these things isn't really working. Right now I'm basically having a friend do the leg work and making the calls they tell me to make. They're at work now so we haven't had a chance to discuss our next move yet.

Though now, apparently, I'm in legal trouble over the missed court date. REPETITIVE HEADDESK.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By pols
On Fri Dec 16, 2011 07:22 PM
Edited by pols (178046) on 2011-12-16 19:24:10
Heart, as someone who has also been hospitalised before I know that you KNOW it's time for that.
Here (Australia) we have the option of fronting up to a hospital's emergency department, saying that we fear for ourselves (you may not be suicidal but I assume you fear for yourself or you wouldn't care at all that everything is currently going to shit) and having a psych consult. Usually, you will be admitted for observation into a general psychiatric ward, pending further evaluation.
Obviously, it's not ideal to be in a general psych ward but it's better than nothing. Is there a similar process where you live or must everything be covered by insurance?
It is so unfair that at the time when you are least able to organise life for yourself these things should fall on your shoulders. Is there no-one (a friend, random social support worker, university counsellor, general dogsbody) who can do the dialling and talking for you? For me, I actually had to have someone else get the numbers and dial the phone and then I would talk. Somehow that made it so much easier for me.
Actually, if there's anything I can do in the lines of internet research etc just send me a PM. I mean it.

EDIT: Bleugh. Just realised you already said you've got a friend doing leg work for you. Sorry. Offer still stands though.

xo
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By kandykanePremium member
On Sun Dec 18, 2011 10:29 AM
How are you doing, hon? I've been thinking about you.

kk~
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire (karma: 2)
By Louisemember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sun Dec 18, 2011 11:46 AM
Heart. Lie.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By SaraTheGrouchmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Sun Dec 18, 2011 12:33 PM
Oh snap.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire (karma: 1)
By Mendelmember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Mon Dec 19, 2011 06:04 PM
I hope things have been sorted out and are going better, but I thought I'd reply in case you're in the same predicament. I showed this thread to my fiance (he's an MD), and he said that while the standards of care have been upheld, if you really feel the need to be hospitalized, the best way to accomplish it is for your parents to take you into the ER. The 3 criteria for admission are being suicidal, homicidal, or delusional. If we can rule out suicidal and homicidal, then my fiance said this post shows a bit too much self-awareness to consider you delusional. However, if your parents take you to the ER with the story you've written here, you won't be demonstrating the self-awareness which is keeping you out of the hospital. So if you can get your parents on board with that, it might be one approach to take. But I really hope that things are better and all of this advice is irrelevant now.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By Moonlitefairy06member has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Mon Dec 19, 2011 07:43 PM
After a post in the M.D./PhD thread she said, P.S. I hate hospitals. Of course that doesn't necessarily mean she was at one when she was posting (Though she indicated she was posting from her phone) so she may have been able to find a way to get the help she needs. I hope so. Please update us Heart when you get the chance and feel up to it.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By Heartmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Wed Dec 21, 2011 02:53 AM
I am in the ER now. I didn't lie, I was 100% honest, said pretty much what I said here. I also said I didn't want to be inpatient here. Though I've been here since 9pm everything's gone astonishingly smoothly.. I guess it's a slow night. Everyone's been really nice & helpful. My ex (the friend who's been handling everything) came with me. A bed has been found in a clinic around a half hour away - it's an actual facility, not just a ward in a hospital, which I'm kind of excited about. I checked out the website and it looks really nice (though who knows). I think it's an actual campus, so you can go outside and stuff, shock of shocks. I've heard the name before. Insurance approved me for 7 days and my info has been faxed over, so we're just waiting on the clinic to get back to us. Then I'll be transferred by ambulance.

I probably won't be able to update you again.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By Puss_in_Bootsmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Wed Dec 21, 2011 03:35 AM
Thanks for the update Heart. I hope this place turns out to be as good as it looks. Thinking of you!
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By mandakp
On Wed Dec 21, 2011 04:15 AM
Edited by mandakp (238858) on 2011-12-21 04:15:54
Hope everything goes okay with this place! Thinking kind thoughts :)
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By kandykanePremium member
On Wed Dec 21, 2011 04:19 AM
I hope this place is everything you hope it will be and you get the help you need. Best wishes!

kk~
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By toroandbruinmember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Wed Dec 21, 2011 09:17 AM
Heart wrote:

I probably won't be able to update you again.
Thanks for letting us know and I hope you get our messages. Congrats to you and your friend for being successfully persistent! Looking forward to seeing your posts again later.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By KeepOnSinginPremium member
On Wed Dec 21, 2011 12:34 PM
Edited by KeepOnSingin (116683) on 2011-12-21 12:35:01
Hope everything works out for you, Heart! Glad you're going to get the treatment you need.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By DarcysReelmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:12 PM
I'll be thinking about you. Glad you're getting the treatment you need.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By Louisemember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Thu Dec 22, 2011 02:16 AM
Heart, I know it's the least of your worries right now but I hope you're able to have a good Christmas. And that the New Year can be a new start for you even though it's purely symbolic.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By Bridgetbeemember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Thu Dec 22, 2011 05:16 AM
I really hope you get the help you're looking for and everything works out okay. Look after yourself and good luck. We're all rooting for you!
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By pols
On Thu Dec 22, 2011 02:11 PM
Just thinking of you today, Heart.

Two things -

1)Let yourself rest.

2) I'm really damn proud of you for getting yourself safe.

xo
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By Tansey
On Thu Dec 22, 2011 02:40 PM
Heart, I hope this place offers you exactly what you need. You showed a lot of courage in getting help. I hope 2012 will be a happy and healthy year for you.
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire
By whdadancermember has saluted, click to view salute photos
On Mon Dec 26, 2011 11:40 PM
I'm so sorry to read this. This is exactly why I hate some insurance companies. They don't see mental illness as something serious. My IC covers treatment up to something like 26 days per year, which, seeing a therapist once a week, only covers 6 months. I started treatment in July and got a letter at the beginning of December saying my coverage has run out for the year, so I'm without treatment for three weeks until the new year starts. Efff...

Sorry for the hijack. My advice is to go to the nearest emergency room and tell them everything you just told us. They'll (hopefully) admit you for a few days in psych (if they have one) and then you can see about getting transferred to a long-term facility. Perhaps you don't need long term? Once you get some meds and nourishment into your system, things may clear up a little? And, yes, I'm overly positive because of the copious amount of pills that are forced down my throat twice a day...
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire (karma: 1)
By ChristinePremium member
On Tue Dec 27, 2011 11:26 AM
I hope your inpatient time was well spent and you are feeling stronger and more able to move forward. (If my Math is correct, you should be almost ready to leave...)

I do hope the new year brings you hope, strength, and peace.

Best wishes
xoxoxo

Keep On Dancing*
re: Apparently, a complete lack of being able to take care of myself means I am not "grossly impaire (karma: 1)
By Heartmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member
On Fri Dec 30, 2011 03:10 PM
I'm back!
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