After a bit of a small drama last night, I began to realize that people are A LOT more flakey since cells phones have become a common social thing. I remember as a child my parents used to say " We planned on meeting them at 3 PM, lets not be late because we might miss them!". Now it has become " Lets call them to let them know we are going to be 45 minutes late."

It isn't only my family that I have noticed this in. It is friends, classmates, even myself! I will sometimes be out with friends, when we have to meet other people. I usually have to nudge the group to go meet them, but they usually just say " Oh just call them that we are changing plans/being late".

People have done this to last minute for study groups too. We planned on meeting at 3 PM in room 205. I was there at 2:55 waiting for people in room 205. They called at 3 and said they wanted to move to room 908 and they were going to be there at 3:30.
I've actually had notes to a study group before, and I just left after 45 minutes of people not showing up. Then they had the nerve to be mad at me when they failed the test the next day!
I've also had people be mad at me when I don't answer my cell phone. " Why didn't you answer your phone, I could have told you I was running late!"

I almost feel like I have to show up 30 minutes late to everything, to actually be on time with a majority of people.

Do you feel that cell phones are contributing to the chronic punctuality issues in todays society? It COULD just be that I am surrounded by flakes in general, but there HAS to be a negative impact on being able to reach someone so easily. As much as I love cell phones, I also hate having my boss be able to reach my so easily for last minute work schedule changes

No, some people are just rude and they always have been.

If they don't feel the need to be punctual it's because they were taught that punctuality is not necessary, that comes from way before cell phones.

Eh, not really. Chronic flakiness sounds a bit extreme.

There are people I know who are never late, and they have cell phones. Then there are older family members who almost never use cell phones, and certainly didn't grow up with them, who are dependably late.

I don't know about flakiness. I think flaky people with call phones now use the cell phones to tell you that they are going to be flake out.

Now inattentive is another story. If I go out to dinner with a friend I expect full attention on our experience together not for her to check her schedule for tomorrow, see which bills are coming up, text 300 of her friends, post of facebook that she is out with me and call her bestie to see how her new hair color came out. It is annoying and I feel hugely disconnected and question the point of the outing.

I too have a cell and may use it during an outing to tell my SO I might be late coming home or to call 911 if I see a horrific car accident outside the diner other than that it stays where it should on silent or vibrate in my purse.

I think saying that cell phones have caused this generation to be flakier is a HUGE, sweeping generalization. And I don't think it's really true; I think the people that were flaky before are going to keep doing it, but now it's easier for them. I'm big on being punctual, and I still make a point to be on time for things even though my cell phone's constantly in my pocket. Is it nice to be able to call ahead if I'm caught in traffic or whatever, and I know I'm going to be a few minutes late? Yeah, but being able to call people while I'm not at home doesn't give me an excuse to be late and inconsistent.

Aerial, I agree with you that it is quite rude to be checking texts/facebook over dinner. I am horrified at the people who have their phones on them during dinner the whole time. I was actually listening a a talk radio show, and they said cell phone withdraw is actually a new thing being talked about. I believe that the University of Florida did a study on how the lack of cell phones trigger anxiety.

aerial wrote:

I don't know about flakiness. I think flaky people with call phones now use the cell phones to tell you that they are going to be flake out.

This, and everyone else who's said it. Flaky people are always going to be flaky. My father brought me up to be punctual and I always have been. Having a mobile phone means that if I now get stuck on my way somewhere (bad traffic, missed a tram, train is late) I can call or text the person I am supposed to be meeting and say "I'm going to be 20 minutes late, had a tram fail)" and they're not sitting there looking at their watch going "Bloody Erin, where the heck is she?"

As for the topic of using phones during an outing, I say that's a big no - in most cases. There are a few friends I have who don't mind if I pull out my phone to update Facebook about where we are - because they're doing it too. Certainly, I would be annoyed if I was out with a friend and she spent the whole time on the telephone to someone else, but by and large I don't mind if someone grabs their phone to update Facebook or check an email. Most of my friends are pretty nerdy so I am not too bothered.

Erin.
::righteous babe::

I grew up without cell phones and I don't think it has caused anyone to be more flakey. Either you have integrity with your word when you are going to be somewhere at a certain time or you don't. Cell phones don't have the ability to change that, nor do I know anyone else that feels like having a cell phone gives them the right to leave other people hanging. It is more convenient to let someone know if you will be late or if you want to change meeting destinations due to circumstances.

I let my boss know that I do not look at my phone or check messages on my busy days until night time, so I think you could have a discussion with your boss about that. I also don't have friends that are 30 minutes late a majority of the time. I choose to not be around people that run their life in such chaos.

I think we just know about the flakiness sooner. Used to be we had to sit and wonder and wait to hear from someone. Now we can know right away. Saves time, I guess?

kk~

Cell phones can't be the whole answer. Transportation also has become far more hectic and uncertain.

Society has changed and cell phones have played a part. Again as kids we did not have cell phones if we planned to go out on the holidays we would have to present our parents with full details of what time we were leaving, which bus we would be on, what we would do, what time we were coming home and which bus and so on. They would have arranged to pick us up and we had to be there.

Cell phones have also allowed kids to get in a bit more trouble. Parents often claim that their reason for buying their child a cell phone is safety, they want to be contactable all the time. But in reality safety is in fact no better.

Before cell phones if there was a change of plans you would need to go through an adult to use the family phone. These days a kid can phone up and say they are anywhere. This of course could happen in the old days too but it was more difficult.

Well, I'm a bit of a flake and my cell phone certainly doesn't make it worse

My circle of friends and I are the type of people who can't be particularly bothered about showing up exactly on time. If we're all meeting up somewhere and some of us show up 15 minutes late, it's not exactly a big deal...we're friends, we don't have a formal relationship. If anything, cell phones are great because they allow us all to keep track of each other with no fuss.

I show up on time for work and appointments, as do most "flakey" people I know. I don't think cell phones contribute to flakiness. Our culture is very focused on being perfectly scheduled, and it's tough when that's not how you're wired. I personally value flexibility and spontaneity in ny social group. As for checking Facebook/phones, again, not something I can be bothered about. Nobody I know spends 24/7 on their phones. If they send a few texts or check Facebook or Twitter, sweet, it's an excuse for us all to and we get back to our conversation. Disclaimer though, this is how I feel about friends/family...not about any sort of business relationship. That's a different issue.

I think that this generation is used to instant gratification. Since I have been teaching kids, in dance, since 1973, I have seen a change in them, and their parents, in this sense.

They don't have to wait long for anything, and if they do, it's unacceptable to them. I mean, they can microwave an entire meal, in a few minutes, or better yet, get a drive thru meal, so they don't even have to push a button.

They can do this while they are on their phone, and Google information. Who has to go to a library and look through catalogs, or a book store and look through books?

Even computers? Who needs one? Just use your phone or Ipad.

You don't even have to use your voice. You can see next to a friend and text. It puts a new spin on passing notes in class.

Cheap clothes, from China (Walmart) means you don't need to repair shoes or clothes, anymore. They are so cheap, it's cheaper to toss them and buy new ones.

Also, parents just don't say, "No" anymore. If the kid wants it, even if it means debt, they get it, every, darned, freakin' gadget out there. Why does an 8 year old kid need to have a cell phone? Don't the parents always know where they are?

I have watched my great niece and nephew, at a dinner or restaurant table. They don't converse with anyone. They sit there and play handheld games because it's easier for my nephew and his wife then teaching them table manners.

I would not call it flaky, I would call it selfish.