According to Wikipedia, which obviously has been my number one source of information since I discovered it while trying to BS a last-minute paper in high school, 2012 is going to be simply awful as our planet falls victim to some catastrophic event sources say will be nowhere near as exciting as that Fox show Terra Nova. In light of this, I've made it my resolution to live this year as if it were my last just in case the Mayans or the conspiracy theorists or whomever are right, and I only live long enough to see my 20s end before I die. My other resolutions include acknowledging the existence of my non-dancer friends more often (I've already been to one party, and it only had one other dancer in the room who was also there because "acknowledging the existence of my non-dancer friends more often" is ome of HER resolutions too), eating fewer meals that consist of bacon and marshmallows/becoming a vegetarian, and retiring once and for all from competition.

So far, I've been pretty successful at eating foods that are actually good for me and not simply foods that I grab from my cupboard in passing because I'm too lazy to cook a proper meal. I've even tried my hand at making some of the staples I pretty much live on including pasta, almond milk, and granola. I'm super pleased with how well all three turned out especially the pasta, which only requires three ingredients and cooks in 2-3 minutes, and did I mention it's also delicious? I'm having a slightly harder time even remembering I'm a vegetarian though. I'll be halfway through chomping down on some tasty pork when it'll hit me, "oh, right, this here's the stuff you're not supposed to be eating right now." I might have to rethink this resolution altogether because, you know, BACON.

You're probably wondering why I don't have any dance-related goals or resolutions beyond the competition thing. Well, Faithful Reader, I really haven't made up my mind about what I want to do, dance-wise, in 2012. I've been pondering studying for my national exam, but every time I open the book, it makes me all twitchy. A couple of my friends have been telling me I should compete in Irish, and as much as I love solo dresses and big hair and tiaras, the thought of retiring from one dance form to start competing in another makes me all twitchy too. I'm really excited about the performance group my friends and I are trying to get off the ground, though, so I think it and my classes, both those I take and those I teach, will keep me plenty busy.

Also, this.

I reckon if my cat could vote, she would be a member of this party.

I'm home again after a two-day vacation that can only be described as seriously indulgent. There was a four-course dinstinctly non-vegetarian meal--think well-done deer with proscuitto-wrapped duck foie gras and fried bacon and brussel sprouts (a most excellent combination), sipping champagne and reading by the fireplace, a 60-minute relaxation massage, hanging out in a hot tub, and enjoying the outdoors with my butt firmly planted in a sleigh pulled by eight super excited Huskies. Coming home to wet, fat snowflakes, an empty fridge, and dirty clothes piled mile-high was BEYOND depressing. I wish I had taken tomorrow off; it was so stupid not to! I did manage to tackle that laundry, and the Boy and I took advantage of our rental car to grab foodstuffs to tide us over for the coming days. I even made a healthy lunch for tomorrow (spaghetti squash "pasta" and a veggie-packed smoothie with carrots, beets, kale, berries, coconut water, soy milk, and protein powder). I had hoped to sneak into the studio this evening to practice, but the weather is awful, and classes were cancelled as a result (I'm really hesitant to dance in my apartment especially after having heard my landlord tell a neighbour of mine that he's received complaints about her dogs). Irish dancers in apartment spaces, how do you practice? I'm at Highland five days a week, so I don't feel nearly as bad not practicing much at home, but there's only so much walking through my steps I can do in my living room with Stupid Cat underfoot. It doesn't help in the end if I can't get through my step when the music comes on.

Anyway, I've got a lesson to plan, and a playlist to assemble, and a newsletter to hash out, and a recital venue to book, and studio insurance to investigate. So it's just another day, isn't it?

My felonious feline agrees that zebra print duct tape is precisely what my dancing's been missing.

^ can I borrow some of that for our ceili performance next week?

Yes ma'am. I'll bring it tomorrow, and you can test drive it then.

Wow, I am really regretting even getting out of bed this morning. I knew it was a bad idea when I turned on my television and heard it was -34C out, and things have only gotten worse from there. Shortly before lunch, I realised I didn’t have my wallet, and a trip back home didn’t turn it up either. I’m not especially worried just yet—I like to think there are still some decent human beings out there who’ll find and return it, no matter how tempting it might be to steal a $200 Coach wallet. (Actually, I wouldn’t necessarily mind if they were to steal the wallet itself as long as I can get back what’s inside—I’m absolutely DREADING having to replace everything. I have a couple of ideas on where it might be, so my fingers are crossed, but I still feel naked without my debit and credit cards or any form of ID, arrrrrgh.) I’ve already phoned the restaurant I was at yesterday and the public transit lost & found and my work building security office and my landlord, but there’s absolutely no sign of it. Not even this delicious chocolate pudding I made can cheer me up. How am I supposed to buy groceries and—OMG!—CAFFEINE?! Seriously, how much do I hate my life right now? (Ok, I’m worried!)

Yesterday, we had a show at a retirement home, and it was ok. I probably felt better about it before today, but now I’m annoyed at the fact that I have to be alive and doing things at all, and I just don’t think we dance our best when it comes to the benevolent seniors. I know I’m guilty of rarely dancing full out or not thinking at all while I dance (see: SeniorLady forgetting all of her reel steps part 5494327438954, although I did impress one little old lady with my flexibility, which makes practicing the splits every day TOTALLY WORTH IT). But I’m also guilty, as a teacher, of using these shows as a way for my students to get mileage on new dances or try out new music etc, and the results aren’t always great. That’s not to say I don’t like doing the retirement shows or aren’t proud of my dancers because I do, and I am. I also can’t ask anyone to try harder under the circumstances (really awful flooring, for the most part). I’m really hoping our performance group will get off the ground and start getting some bigger paid performances where we’ll simply have to kick it up a notch.

(I just want to reiterate right now that I am the biggest idiot of life for letting go of my wallet at all, jeez.)

I went to a step class on Saturday to get caught up on the clog after missing the last few classes. My teacher is the sweetest person ever, and it’s kind of a problem; she could probably stand to take some disapproving lessons from seannetta. I thought she might just be nicer to her adults for fear of scaring us all away, but I’ve sat in on some of her children’s classes, and she’s that nice to everyone. That’s fine, except I don’t really know what to work on other than committing the steps to memory and trying for some discernable rhythm. On Saturday, we danced one of our reels at impossible speeds because our teacher wanted to give us the chance to “dance like the big kids” (we’d had a show the previous weekend where one of the numbers was mind-numbingly-fast). She also said she was preparing us in case we were to ever find ourselves in the company of Leahy and wanted them to play for us. I commented on how unlikely that was, and she told me one of her former students had married their drummer, so I guess I got OWNED. Anyway, I’ve established that while my feet can move quickly, my brain cannot, so I mostly just shuffled my way through the dance—and got a nod of approval, of course.

Oh no! I was so sure the wallet would eventually turn up under a ball of fur or in an emptied pint of Guinness. Gah, that really sucks.

As for performances, perhaps something to consider is playing just the intros for people backstage before the performances of the dances, so they can have a brief bit of music in their brains before starting. It can indeed be a bit scary to be standing there waiting to dance and not sure what music is about to start playing, but that can be easily remedied.

I did search, and search, and search, but so far I haven’t had any luck, and now I’ve mostly moved on from “a little worried” to “full-blown panic.” I’m really, really hoping someone’s picked it up and is going to contact me, which wouldn’t be difficult at all given that my ID is in there, and I have beautiful business cards with a number and an email address. There’s absolutely no reason for anyone who may have it to wonder who it might belong to. As a precaution, I did cancel my credit and debit cards, although I’d like to see anyone try and steal my money, ‘cause I never had any in the first place; there are a few other things, however, that will be slightly more problematic to replace, and I honestly feel ill just thinking about it. And there are sentimental things, too, that can’t be replaced, and I’m REALLY upset about those.

Just to cement this week as possibly the worst week ever, this morning I choked on a multivitamin and coughed loudly and long enough to cause the Boy to come check up on me. It’s not even like I was swallowing a giant pill, which I have huge hang-ups about anyway—it was a CHEWABLE multivitamin! Then I made it to the office and realised I had forgotten to pack indoor shoes, so now I’m sitting here in bare feet wondering what I should put on if I need to go anywhere—big, furry winter boots? step shoes? ghillies?

I can honestly say it’s times like these where I’m grateful for dance. It instantly brightens my mood, even when the class itself isn’t great, so I was really glad to go to Irish last night even though I was obviously distracted thinking about various scenarios involving my wallet (see: teenage douchebag with his pants down to his knees throwing all of my belongings onto the street from the window of his parents’ Honda and then gifting my expensive wallet to his lowbrow girlfriend hoping to get some). So I may be basically f-ed for life, but at least I still have the familiar pain in my shins, and I know how that sounds, but I’m really not trying to be obtuse, Faithful Reader. And now I’m keeping an eagle-eye on the weather since school buses have all been cancelled, which means a remote possibility that dance classes will be too, and I really don’t want to spend my evening wallowing in self-pity, eating chocolate pudding, and watching Keeping up with the Kardashians. I want to go to step class and shuffle-step my way awkwardly through a clog.

Also, I may possibly be studying for my nationals associate. And by possibly I mean I definitely am. Realistically, I probably won’t be ready to take the exam until next year because I am literally the biggest hornpipe idiot ever, but for now I’m aiming for December because otherwise I’ll keep putting off studying because I’ll feel like I have “so much time.” Anyway, now I’m accountable to you, Faithful Reader! Ask me about the seven step side travel! Or double trebles! Or hornpipe breaks! Actually, no, forget that last one.

Yay to you for doing the Nationals exam!! If you need someone to sit with and quiz you over an adult beverage give me a call...I am really good at coming up with questions related to the hornpipe while simultaneously filling glasses with a cup-o-cheer. Plus who doesn't love counting low-cutting in beats and bars?!

^^^ Thanks for the offer, scarrie_berrie! I had many an adult beverage while preparing for my Highland exam—I think I might actually assimilate information BETTER when I have a nice oatmeal or chocolate stout in my hand—but I’m not quite ready for quizzing just yet. There’s the issue of my hornpipe book being MIA and the simple fact that you’ve raised my blood pressure tenfold just by mentioning lowcutting. I did briefly glance at the exam syllabus though and am not super clear on what I need to know. I never took grade exams for nationals, but I know that with the Highland exam I was expected to be able to describe everything from grades primary to V (and more). Does that apply to the national exam as well? I know that the five dances I’ll need are lilt, flora, barracks, laddie, and hornpipe, but the earlier grades include being able to describe and demonstrate movements such as plié and turn and single and double trebles, which evidently are not found in any of those five dances, but should I know them anyway? And I’m guessing in terms of hornpipe I should just memorise the entire text? That’s what’s stressing me out the most, honestly. I think if the exam was only lilt, flora, barracks, and laddie, I’d probably be ready to take it in May. Stupid hornpipe with its stupid steps and its stupid hat.

Good news, though, Faithful Reader. I got the most wonderful phone call yesterday: someone found my wallet!! You can’t imagine how relieved I was when that call came, and I learned that my little wallet was but a short bus ride away. I was so excited I barely needed a bus at all. I could have skipped there. I celebrated with leftover chicken wings (clearly I am not cut out to be a vegetarian) and a big bowl of pity-turned-party pudding. HURRAH! I vow to never leave my belongings unattended again.

Highland classes were cancelled yesterday evening due to the weather, but three of us keeners (ok, two keeners and one hanger-on) went to the studio anyway to use the empty space to practice. I really needed the time and space to work through my solo, which is on-again off-again (currently on-again!), as I couldn’t remember the ending at all (not the one I did at the competition last February, nor the one I danced at a fundraiser in May, nor the third version that I used for our recital in June). I’m pretty happy with this newest ending, however, and I wrote it down, so it should hopefully stick. The dance itself isn’t too difficult, which means it likely won’t wow audiences any time soon, but I think it really suits me, and I get to dance my slip jig in it, and you know, my slip jig brings all the boys to the yard.

Step class wasn’t cancelled, but the weather must have scared most people off since I was the only one in my class. That makes me super uncomfortable for several reasons, the biggest of which involves the sound of my shoes scratching away at the boards all sad-like and amplified—you couldn’t even pick out a rhythm if you tried! I think I might have gotten a compliment though, above and beyond the usual “Nice effort!” whenever I’ve forgotten how to use my legs altogether and am stomping my feet and whining like a four-year-old. But my teacher said I should be proud of how far I’ve come on the first reel given that she never taught it to me but instead just gave me a sheet with all the steps written out on them and said, “you can pick these up by watching, right?” And I never really thought of it that way given that I don’t find the first reel particularly impressive and instead always just assumed that I should have been able to make it look better by now. So that’s food for thought, I guess.

The boy and I have actually begun talking about our wedding as though it might happen within the foreseeable future. There is still the small issue of our total lack of funds and the even bigger issue of our total lack of motivation, but we’ve been throwing ideas around about possible ceremony options and reception venues and why it wouldn’t be financially responsible for me to ask all 20 of our performance group members to be my bridesmaids. (I am also supposedly not allowed to ask the city to block off several streets so that an entire pipe band can play while every member of my wedding party parades to the reception—I’m not sure why I’m even engaged to this guy! He never lets me do anything!) Anyway, after this particular discussion our brains had begun to ache, so we gave up and watched some TV instead. At this rate, I predict our wedding will take place in, oh, five to ten years, maybe.

Since my last post, I danced the newest version of my solo for my teacher, and she ok-ed most of the changes although she would like to see a proper introduction, and there was some concern about the Irish/Step dance interlude, which is still awful—I really don’t know what to do with it at this point. My duet, however, is looking much better now that we’ve changed a section and actually know all of the dance, and a ton of progress has been made on my trio too, and I’m really relieved because I was kind of worried about that. We’re nearly through to the end, though, and I think it’ll look really good once we’re all comfortable with it.

I’ve also found my missing hornpipe book, and I’m not looking forward to reading it AT ALL. I’ve looked at it once or twice since getting it back on Saturday, and I’m pretty discouraged. There are 20 steps (including alternates), and a myriad of positions and arm actions and basic movements that are all unique to the hornpipe. And does anyone know what the most recent version of the text is? There doesn’t seem to be anything in mine that indicates when it was printed, but I’m worried it was about 300 years ago … when it was still acceptable to ask anyone to dance their hornpipe at 208. Unless I’m being really dense here? Does 52 bars to the minute in a 4/4 dance not equal 208 beats per minute? I can’t even dance my Irish reel at 113—I certainly can’t fathom anything at 208. I would have a conniption. I might have one anyway just looking at this stupid book. I’m feeling pretty good about the other four dances though since I’m armed with practice exams and a copy of my teacher’s The Complete Guide to the Scottish National Dances. The guide suggests tunes that each dance can be performed to, which is super handy because I couldn’t remember a single reel for my Highland exam (and still can’t). Interestingly, one of the tunes it suggests for lilt is Brose and Butter, which is my favourite 9/8 jig, and I finally got a version of it on the pipes that I like, but it’s 8 steps long—perfect to practice counting the steps to but not ideal for my stamina in performance, eh.

Speaking of performances, my Irish class had its performance last Saturday, and I think we were all really happy with how it went. I zoned out at one point (‘cause I was totally watching the dancer next to me, who wasn’t even doing the same dance form as me), and got on the wrong foot, but I don’t know noticeable it was to the audience although one of the other dancers noticed. Too late to worry about it now. Our group choreography was great, and I think the audience really enjoyed it and the mix of Irish, Highland, and step. Also I had beer! And soda bread! And legitimately participated in a set dance! And then ate more soda bread! Life is good, obviously.

I survived the first non-choreography-centric Irish class of the year relatively unscathed; I say relatively because although the class itself was great (I remembered all my steps and kept the embarrassing faceplants to a minimum), later when I was safely ensconced in my Forever Lazy, my shins exploded, and I spent a better part of the evening sitting on the floor with ice packs crudely strapped to my legs with dish towels. I was so careful too: I warmed up! I stretched! I wore dance sneakers! My shins are still sore this morning, and I have three-and-a-half hours of class tonight. I’m really hoping I’ll have worked out some of the kinks in my body by then.

Sad news, though, Faithful Reader. I think it might be time to retire my hardshoes. I’m hoping a little TLC and some elastics will do the trick because I really, really like these (what’s there not to like, really—they were previously owned by a champ dancer who did all the work breaking them in for me), but they’re a little bit big, especially on my skinnier foot, which is literally just swimming inside my shoe. It’s no secret that I hate shoes altogether—I’m really not comfortable unless I can feel my feet against the floor—but I really can’t get by without hardshoes. Ugh, the only thing I hate more than breaking in new shoes is paying for new shoes. Oh gosh, I just googled the exact same shoes I’m wearing now, and new ones will cost $145 (without shipping and taxes), so I can just forget that.

I really did a number on my shins this Monday. I honestly felt fine at class; the now all-too-familiar pain didn’t even surface until later that evening, but it stayed with me all day yesterday and made last night’s classes particular awful. Step class was fine; I’m rarely in pain during or after it (exhausted and confused? Yes. In pain? No.) At one point in time, there were four or five of us in my class, but I was alone again this week, which I hate. I now know four dances and am not particularly happy with any of them, so I made my teacher watch me dance all of them and point out things I could improve on. She doesn’t really do that, and it was mostly just comments like how I’m hopping when I shouldn’t be or aren’t hopping when I should. I told her I thought one dance in particular sounded like nothing, but she said it was fine. She said I just wasn’t dancing at a level where I would “hear” it yet. I have absolutely no idea what that means other than it being a reflection on that fact that beginners are supposed to sound awful. She did hint that she would prefer it if I wasn’t wearing my friend’s discarded, broken-down, too-small-for-me shoes, but I don’t know that I love step enough to invest in my own footwear just yet. It's proving to be a very slow process.

I spent three-and-a-half hours at Highland afterwards, and my right shin retaliated almost immediately (like, I had to stop hopping during the second step of a six-step fling). I danced a terrible attempt at a long ST and an even more terrible Flora and then sat out a portion of the class to tend to my shins with a makeshift ice pack. The good news is that my trio is finally finished. There are a couple of parts that will need to be ironed out, such as the proper way to dance a 3-person figure eight (I know that sounds like the most ridiculous thing of life, but if you’re a Highland dancer used to being beaten to within an inch of her life to get those “corners” in a 4-person figure “just right”, cutting out that fourth dancer is more or less akin to the end of the world). I’m personally too stupid to teach a 3-person figure, so we’ll see what happens on Sunday when we have our next practice.

We also danced through our group piece, most of which I have forgotten. Obviously the correct course of action at this point is to forget about dancing entirely and try this butternut squash ravioli with pepper marshmallows from Kitchen Window. I’ve been meaning to make my own marshmallows for a while (they’re so much better than the store-bought kind—it’s like eating clouds), but I’m just so very lazy. I have some baking lined up for the weekend anyway (you know, in those extra 15 hours I plan to add to each day), and you know me—how can I say no to pasta with marshmallows on it?!

So I’m not really in the market for a solo dress given that I have basically no money, and people are only going to watch me forget my reel so many times in concert before it becomes so yesterday no matter how pretty I look, but suppose I won the lottery or was named as the sole beneficiary of some distant-but-mega-rich relative, wouldn’t you agree, Faithful Reader, that this might very well be the most perfect dress for a SeniorLady? I pretty much live for bright colours and tulle and crystals. Obviously there would be zebra-striped kick pants involved too.

I’ve danced in about a billion shows since I last posted: there was a wee retirement home gig where I was unexpectedly paid and fed; a second paying retirement home gig where I recruited a staff member to Highland and got a wedding proposal from an old man; a third retirement home gig where I danced an eight-step lilt with boy arms while counting in my head (this counts as “studying”, by the way); a short, shin-busting appearance at a fundraiser that yielded lots of pain but two stunning pictures of seannetta and I looking adorable, which is basically what we do best; and a short set in the lobby of a theatre where I basically forgot how to Irish dance (and felt seannetta’s stern look of disapproval in absentia). Luckily, my wonderful photographer friend knows a thing or two about making even the most confused dancer look good, and she got a great shot of my reel where my foot is pretty much up at my face, and, ok, it’s not turned out; and my arms are awful; and the look on my face kind of screams OH GOD SOMEONE IS GOING TO BEAT ME FOR THIS LATER, but whatever. I’ll take it! My dancers performed at four other events I wasn’t involved in (three Robbie Burns gigs and a workshop for some Brownies), so we’ve been busy.

Over on the studying front, I’ve been a sloth. I have a booklet of practice questions and have made it through the Flora ones with enough accuracy that I feel pretty confident I can ignore that dance for the time being and focus on one of the more annoying ones. Flora is great in that in only has six steps and the male arms are “at the teacher’s discretion” which means I can make them up as a go along (or do the entire dance in first). I should do Laddie next since it too only has six steps. Lilt and Barracks have eight, and hornpipe has 7000. I really should do hornpipe next but I don’t know where to start. (Don’t say page one because I’ve already tried that, and it was hard, and then I quit.) I’ve been particularly unmotivated these past few days because I’ve been having this weird foot pain all this week. I first noticed it on Monday during the day, when it was mostly a nagging pain, but it’s gotten progressively worse, and now it pretty much hurts constantly. I also fell over dancing the first step of the sword yesterday, so now my ankle hurts as well. It hasn’t been a good week for my foot.

Anyway, I took a wee break from doing all this dancing to go and watch other people dance. I saw the Royal Winnipeg Ballet’s production of Svengali, and although I thought the pacing was a bit weird (the first act went on for much longer that I’d have liked it to, and the second ended abruptly), overall, I really enjoyed the performance. The reviews weren’t altogether positive, but I liked it. The dancing was spectacular, and I wasn’t bored. There were a couple of numbers that I really enjoyed, mostly group numbers in the first act, but as an audience member I’m generally pretty easy to please.

Wedding planning is effin' hard. Just saying. I'm in awe of those people who get engaged one minute and have the whole wham, bam, thank you ma'am planned out the next. I honestly did not think we would be having this conversation any time soon, but today the Boy mentioned a date in passing and ideas for where we could hold the ceremony and his thoughts on how we'd incorporate his band and my dancers into the reception, and all the while I was thinking "Oh, you actually want to get married? Like for reals?" It's not that I don't want to go through with it -- I do. It's just that the task of actually planning a wedding seems incredibly overwhelming. My best friend gave me this "Wedding Planning for Disorganized Sloths" book, and it's got a checklist of about 1500 tasks that couples need to accomplish in order to have a stellar wedding. That's, like, 1499 too many. I literally don't want to do anything except show up on the day of looking super cute and then have a pint or two of Guinness. Anyway, I've been tasked with looking into possible ceremony sites (we're not having a church wedding because we're obviously satanists), so I've been busy Googling. If it was up to me, we'd just go to City Hall, but I think our parents would cry. I'm not finding anything I like, so I'm going to stop Googling that for now and will instead search for little gifts I can give those ladies I plan to ask to be my bridesmaids. (I'm going to mail them all cards and gifts because I'm cutesy and also because I don't want to see the look of disgust on their faces when they open them and think WHY AM I EVEN GETTING THIS I HATE SENIORLADY.)

We had a dance team meeting today that was pretty productive; I was kind of preoccuppied with a headache and lingering foot pain, so I'm not sure how much I contributed to the meeting, if anything at all. I have several things to do, however, so I'm hoping to get those done now with the Boy away for the evening and the cat safely ensconced in her office. I've been unusually grumpy today and even snapped at a classmate when, instead of telling me I was in the wrong spot during one part of our choreography, she reached out and shoved me. I really hate it when people do that. This isn't kindergarten. Just use your words. I'm hoping a somewhat relaxed evening will cheer me up a little. When the Boy comes home, we're going out for cake, and I plan to indulge in the most decadent one I can find. If this weekend is going to end without me having had a chance to enjoy it, it better end on a sweet note.

Cake makes everything feel better right? If not I can beat someone for you or we can just meet at starbucks and rant about it over delicious coffee!

I really need to have my foot looked at. Can someone please remind me to have my foot looked at? I only danced for about 45 minutes last night, if that – I was late getting to Irish because I’d had to teach Highland until 7:30, so I missed the softshoe portion of the class and only did hardshoe. The minute I put my shoes on, I got this nagging pain in the instep of my left foot that turned to full-on pain after about 20 minutes of dancing, and I chose to ignore it, for the most part, until I couldn’t and had to take my shoe off and put on my disapproving face. I can’t even really identify where the pain is coming from exactly. I thought it was just the instep, but I was massaging it at class last night, and pressing one particular spot on the underside of my foot (on the ball closest to my big toe) sent a jolt of pain through my whole foot that made my eyes tear up a little, so I’m really not sure what’s going on in there.

Anyway, what little dancing I did do last night was spent working on my set dance. My classmate gave herself the goal of having the dance performance-ready by this summer; I personally can’t wait that long. It should have been performance-ready, like, last year. It’s not as if I don’t know the dance at all because I do. It’s just so contingent on rhythm, and I’m not hearing any (or, in any case, I’m only hearing the SeniorLady rhythm, which is nearly always wrong.) I listened to the song a few times after class (ok, maybe more than a few times—so many in fact that the Boy left the comfort of his animal room to snark me, “There must not be anything on TV. You’re listening to your set dance again.”) and it might have helped a little, but it probably didn’t. So I’m kind of frustrated.

The old lesson of "learn to sing your steps" will help you best. Once you have the tune stuck in your head, you just make the words fit where normally just humming would go. I'll show you some time. Oh, but for the parts that you literally can't say what your feet should be doing, mumble!

Yes, set dances are songs with your feet. As are all advanced TJ's and HP's, actually. These are the lyrics to your song. If you learn them in advance of next week you'll be well ahead of the class, as learning the lyrics is something I'm going to insist on now that everyone's getting comfortable with the actual movements.

Step:
jump down-treble hop back 2 3, heel down step up kick down, down-treble-and-treble-and-treble hop back 2 3 step kick toe-up down-treble-hop-back-bang, ontoyourheel-bang, ontoyourheel-bang-bang-toe-up down-treble-and-toe, down treble hop back

Set:
Jump down-treble-hop-back step kick-down-2-3 up-kick-down, down-toe-up down-toe-up, down-treble-and-treble-and-treble hop back-2-3 step kick down-treble-hop-back-bang-bang down-treble-hop-back click-2-3 click-2-3 click-2-3, down-treble-and-toe-and-heel, and heel and toe-and heel and toe, up kick-down, treble-treble hop back-twist-twist jump-jump down-treble-1-2-3 down-treble hop back

I've literally listened to the tune 97 million times, so not knowing it really isn't the problem, and if either of you is ever in the market for an off-key rendition, I'm your gal! (Having said this, please never ask me to sing it out loud in public.) But I promise I'll be marginally better next week if you both promise to beat me harder -- you have my permission as long as it's not soul-crushing or with a big stick full of rusty nails (clean nails are ok).

Knowing the tune and knowing how to fit the "lyrics" properly to the tune are
2 very different things! But a stick of nails never hurts either.

^ I know! That's my problem! I know the tune, and I know the words (albeit not exactly as you've written them, which may have been part of the problem). I just can't make the words fit the music; I think I can, but then when we dance it in class, I always seem to be on another planet entirely.

It's interesting how a good class can instantly brighten my mood and make even the worst of days somehow tolerable; unfortunately, the reverse is also true, and a bad class will often leave me wondering why I didn't choose an activity that isn't nearly as heartwrenching and frustrating as dance can be. I snuck into an empty studio this evening to work on my solo, and after 45 minutes I had barely made it past the one-minute mark -- I was on the wrong foot; or I had the wrong arm up; or I was dancing one step when I should have been doing another. I didn't come up with a new intro like I had set out to do, and I never made it to the ending, so I don't know if the new sections I choreographed are any good at all (although, if the rest of it is any indication, I can basically assume they're not). I didn't make it through the slip jig once either, and I watched myself doing it, which was a huge mistake -- for a step I'm not entirely convinced wasn't choreographed with me in mind (skipping! twirling! leaping! jumping!), it actually looked pretty awful. I am wearing the disapprovingest look of disapproval ever right now. I promised my Highland teacher I'd have a finished dance to show her this weekend, and that's not looking all that likely. (I also promised my Irish teachers there'd be marginal improvement on my set dance, and that's looking less and less likely too since after this evening I've lost all motivation to even get off my couch at all. "Dancing? What's that? I don't do that!") I'm sure I'm overreacting, but I just get so invested, you know?

Thank heavens I am in a much better mood this morning. Reading that last entry has left me feeling somewhat conflicted – on the one hand, I think it’s hilarious that I’m like a capricious teenager whose mood fluctuates with every class; on the other, I think it’s disconcerting that I’m like a capricious teenager whose mood fluctuates with every class when there are so many other factors that should influence it. In any case, I am currently both caffeinated and muffinated so evidently ready to take on the world, and anyway, yesterday wasn’t even a complete write-off despite my epic display of white whine. I made myself a study plan to keep this whole exam business on track (it got mostly derailed these last few weeks); the plan involves some in-depth revision of one dance at a time, and I started with the Flora because although no one ever likes dancing it, in terms of revision, it’s probably one of the easiest dances to memorise (if not the easiest). I basically just jotted down everything I knew about it – the time signature, the recommended tempo, examples of suitable tunes you might dance it to, the number of steps/bars to the step/total bars to the dance, notes about arms for males and females, special movements used that weren’t previously described in the highland text (curtsy, syncopated hops, third rear aerial very low, etc). Then I listed each step by name in numerical order and described each bar by bar. I also made note of the arms I would teach male dancers; I practiced counting each step in beats and bars; I walked through all six steps with my suggested male arms; and I danced all six steps through (and even managed to get the soft spring in step four looking almost like something you might legitimately enjoy watching). I was feeling pretty accomplished then especially after having dance the World’s Ugliest Solo and also forgetting how to Irish dance earlier that evening. Of course, the downside is that I went to bed at some ridiculously late hour (uhm, make that ridiculously early hour of the following day.) Tonight I’ll do the Flora questions from my test booklet and will do the online flashcard quizzes I set up (I am nerd! Hear me quiz!), and then I’ll officially be done with that and will move on to the lilt. (Yes, I’m STILL avoiding the hornpipe. It's definitely last on my study plan.)

I wish I could say I've tackled the lilt like a boss, but that would be a lie; basically I've gone through the practice questions (and aced them, yay) without bothering to do much of anything else. I am absolutely going to find the time to jot down notes about it like I did with the Flora (tempo, time signature, special movements although I think there are none, male/female arms, etc.) I feel pretty good about dancing all eight steps, although I've got to remember when to use 4th and when to use 4th intermediate and that there are two methods of dancing bars 4 and 8 of the sixth step (one rock and round-the-leg out or two rocks and shake) and bar 4 of the eighth step (springpoints vs. shuffles - I have seriously never seen a single person do shuffles, but I might break them out at a future show). I also have to practice counting the second step (the first count of the bar is on the spring; I've been counting &1 2 & 3 and extending my working foot to 4th intermediate aerial on the & count, but it's actually 1 2 & 3 with the re-extension on 3) and the fourth and fifth steps as well because for some reason 1 & 2, 3 & 2, 2 3 and 5 & 2, 3 & 6, 2, 3 really trips me up ... and writing these down just now has made me realise they are the same. That's right, Faithful Reader. The rhythm train doesn't even stop here. (No, there was no marginal improvement on that set dance tonight, by the way, but there were no beatings either, though I did catch my teacher looking rather incredulous at my superhero-like ability to hear counts that aren't there. Sorry, but uh you are really going to earn your paycheque with me. Lately, we've been spending the last few minutes of class working on timing, and while I get why we need to do it, it actually makes me butterflies-in-the-stomach nervous -- sooner or later people are going to catch on that I'm only pretending to know what I'm doing. Also, I hate people watching me, which is hilarious if you think about it because I have a performance group now haha.) Anyway, I think it may be bedtime.