I just now caught up with last night's episode, and I'm going to shift gears a little bit.

PLEASE tell me last night was all staged. I wasn't a big Peyton-and-Leslie fan either, but my heart was BREAKING for them last night, especially Peyton. Bless her heart! I truly and honestly hope that they both knew that was going to happen, because I actually teared up myself when she started to cry. These girls may be media-savvy, but they aren't that good of actresses to fake those kind of tears. I have to believe she was hurt in some way.

Did anyone else feel this way, or is this just striking a nerve with me?

Errr......I may be really mean, but quite frankly the face that kid made when she thought she was on top of the pyramid struck a nerve with me. She's such a snotty person that I wasn't isn't feel too bad...and the way she kept covering her eyes to try....I don't know. I think she knew.

On another note...this was the competition I went to( and you can see me in the background if you know to look!! and my student is in the awards scene a LOT! however, they didn't even give mention to chloe and maddies solos....which they did here as well...interesting. I was hoping to see one of my other kids but they didn't mention maddies division.

Also, is Jill driving anyone else bananas?

For the past 2 episodes I have gotten choked up watching these kids cry.

I agree with Misslizz404 that these kids couldn't possible be faking the tears. The way Chole was treated last week completely broke my heart; to the point that I was torn whether or not to even tune in to this weeks show.

It was nice to see Abby compliment Mackenzie this week as well as send the team out of the room while the parents acted out their drama scene.

I love/hate this show

Slight hijack but Kendalls mom reminds me of the nail lady from Legally blonde.

I honestly can't believe that parents would pay to send their kids somewhere where they are abused like that... but thats just me.

LlamaLlamaDuck wrote:

I honestly can't believe that parents would pay to send their kids somewhere where they are abused like that... but thats just me.

My thoughts, exactly.

It sucks that the children are treated like that, and I really do not care for Payton's mother, but kudos for her for questioning the other moms on why they keep coming back.

The sad part is that I think the moms don't want to admit that they like the results that they are seeing with their daughters. They like the trophies, the glitz and fuss over their children's achievements. They are a really talented group of girls.

I am in no way sticking up for Abby or justifying her methods, however, the moms are giving her permission to treat their children like that by constantly returning to that studio and paying her to do so. Nobody is forcing them to stay. (Well, maybe Lifetime if they signed a contract, but that's a whole different issue )

I wonder what it would take for one of them to say, "I've had enough." And leave there, or at least the competition squad, for good.

Ok I've been holding off my opinion on this but I think I'm finally going to give it since it coincides with what Jaenis_Yahad said. Go ahead and blast me if you want, but this is the way I feel. I don't have as much of a problem with Abby as everyone else seems to. Every once in a while she does something that I don't agree with or says something that is unproductive and ugly, but for the most part, she just seems like someone who knows her business very well. That business is PREPARING THESE GIRLS FOR A CAREER. These parents know this, and they want that career for their kids. They know that nobody else in the area can give that to their kids, and it's important enough for them to watch them undergo some rough treatment.

I had teachers when I was a kid that would have made Abby look like Pollyanna. They yelled, scolded, and made me cry at times. You know what? I loved them. I respected them. They made a huge impact on my life and I owe so much to them. They loved us and really invested so much extra time to polish us till we shined, which included hearty helpings of tough love. I am sure if a crew came in, filmed their classes, and edited them to hell and back, they would have looked downright abusive. I can promise you, they weren't.

Is Abby abusive on the show? Yes, she is at times, and it is wrong. I am convinced that a huge chunk of it is to give the show an edge. Bottom line is that she is not looking to create GOOD dancers, she is looking to create EMPLOYABLE dancers. I work at a fabulous studio full of wonderful, hardworking dancers. Are any of them employable? No, probably not. People don't come to our studio for that. Our kids compete and do well, but they are not the kind of kids that would thrive under someone like Abby's instruction. They would get discouraged, burn out and leave. Kids who do well in that kind of environment go to the extremely serious studios where they practically have to live there. Abby's kids are the same way. People have choices. We all do what we are paid to do. Abby is being paid to yell and scream as a way to prepare her dancers for what she is hoping they will move on to next. Is it right? I don't know. Barbra Streisand was notorious for putting fellow actors through absolute HELL in order to get a performance up to her standards. Was that right? Who's to say? All we see are the results, and they are amazing. That's what these moms want for their kids. If the girls do burn out and grow up bitter about this experience, their anger will likely be directed towards their mothers for subjecting them to such harsh treatment year after year, not Abby.

Again, this is just my opinion. You are welcome to disagree, but I truly hope this doesn't open a can of nasty worms.

I completely agree with you Missliz. I like Abbey, I think she genuinely cares about the kids and she puts her heart and soul into what she does. I think if you filmed us all while we were teaching all the time, you could edit it to make most dance teachers look this way. She teaches those kids valuable life and skills and thats what most dance teachers used to be like.

missliz I also agree with you. Sports coaches act the same way, yet no one seems to get upset over it b/c the parents want their children to be "superstars" and among the elite. I am not saying I necessarily agree or not with Abby's methods. I would like to know how she really is b/c it's hard to tell with what Lifetime wants us to see or believe.

RileyA wrote:

I think if you filmed us all while we were teaching all the time, you could edit it to make most dance teachers look this way.

I am always saying this to people about any of these shows.

If you filmed me for a week and edited it into an 1 hour show... oh the many versions of me you would see.
Lazy
junk food
health nut
working woman
stay at home mom
drunk
emotional wreck
strong headed
etc

I am against the show. Period. It's not what it really is but what it conveys to the world. Studies have shown, and I just ran into one last night, without looking, how kids, and people in general, do take a lot of this as truth and this show has role models for people.

So many bad mothers, houswives, etc. shows out there are starting to make people think that this behavior is acceptable. I watched one episode of most of those shows and my blood pressure rose, literally. I don't have high blood pressure, but I could feel my face getting hot and my heart rate go up.

Maybe I am the oddball, but I can't stand watching them. Even when I watch my only show like that, Toddlers and Tiaras, once someone starts acting that way, I turn it off and go to HGTV, history or discovery channel. At least animals killing each other makes more sense.

I can see the point about her trying to produce a certain standard with her dancers... BUT when the parents keep questioning why they send their kids there and they are visibly upset, I often wonder if in this case it's worth it.

I grew up in a very different dance environment where enjoying to dance was equally as important as dancing well.

Oh dear....if someone filmed me and then edited it, I could look like a really mean SO and crazy teacher. I am THE biggest exaggerator...have been since I was a child. I think it was being raised by a dance teacher/musical theater dancer that did it to me, she was always so dramatic and over-the-top!

I think within the last week I have threatened to cut off multiple fingers, arms and feet. Wednesday I told one class to just stop dancing if they were not going to implement my corrections, because I can't watch them do it wrong over and over again, anymore. I told my older kids "I swear I will lose it, if you don't shut your mouths". Seriously, my kids love me and just know I'm like that.

My mom would have looked crazier than Cathy, if she had been filmed coaching us growing up. She used to fling herself on the floor, or against the wall, like she was fainting because we did something "so horribly it killed her". We would do a dance, she would just turn around and leave the classroom because she "couldn't look at us right now".

For gymnastics, our coaches were down right cruel! We were constantly compared to others, told we would never beat so and so or make it as a gymnast, bent into impossible positions and run into the ground. No parent ever questioned it.

The difference to me is the yelling and screaming. I don't do it, no teacher I have ever taken from has done it, no coach has ever done it. It is the part about Abby I hate the most, as well as the moms.

If you think about it, Melissa is the only one who doesn't get worked up to Abby. I don't think it's because she is kissing butt, I think she genuinely doesn't like confrontation. She has had a couple of issues, but she brings them to Abby calmly. When one of the other moms goes to talk to Abby they go into defense and attack mode, raise voices and get Abby going. Once the yelling starts then all the crazy comes out. Another thing that makes me crazy about Abby is the snippy hand. She gets that hand going when she's talking, snip-snip, clicking those nails together. Seems disrespectful to me.

Honestly, I don't take issue with the show. My studio parents and I have a ball discussing it. My husband takes issue with show. Here is where we disagree. I don't think people are that stupid, that they think this is what the dance world is like. And if they are that stupid, I don't really want them at my studio anyways. My husband just thinks most people are really stupid.

When I talk to people about it, outside the dance world, they always say they can't believe people act like that. They don't believe most studios are like this because they don't know any people like this! They have tried extra curricular, and although they have met some exceptions, they KNOW people don't act like that! The main questions I get is "Are other dance schools really afraid to compete against them?" and "Are they really that big of a deal, in the dance world?" Hahahaha, NO and NO.

cheerspirit wrote:

If you think about it, Melissa is the only one who doesn't get worked up to Abby. I don't think it's because she is kissing butt, I think she genuinely doesn't like confrontation. She has had a couple of issues, but she brings them to Abby calmly. When one of the other moms goes to talk to Abby they go into defense and attack mode, raise voices and get Abby going.

Holly's mom always approaches Abby in a professional and calm manner. However, Abby always attacks her. It's almost like she resents the fact that Holly works, and not only is she a working mom but she is an educator/administrator. What is that about? Something from her childhood with her parents?

Janet - So you're not as much against Toddlers and Tiaras as you are Dance Moms? Dance Moms features kids training for a career in a very tough environment with crazy stage moms, while Toddlers in Tiaras features trashy families living vicariously through their kids and teaching their kids to prance with a fake tans and fake teeth something they are almost guaranteed to not make a career out of. You mentioned that you change it when someone is acting like that...when are they not?! Every episode is about badly behaved people. So little of it is about the kids. I hope this comment doesn't appear snarky, I just would have assumed that someone with that strong of a stand against a show like Dance Moms would hate any show of the like. Perhaps you just watch it for entertainment, which is the only reason any of us watch Dance Moms. It features something that we are familiar with in a way that isn't shown much on TV.

Holly, though calm, always has a look of disdain on her face and speaks to Abby slightly condescending. I'm not saying Abby isn't asking for it, or that Holly shouldn't have a say! Most of the things Holly has brought up I totally understood. I just know if a mom came to me with that look on her face and a tone like Holly does, I might not feel so great about that mom. I wouldn't start screaming, but I don't scream regardless.

I do agree that Abby has a weird obsession with Holly being a working mom. I think it's because in Abby's head DANCE comes first, Abby comes first, etc.

I guess I don't understand - if they want their kids to be trained by Abby, will put up with the behavior just to win, then they need to adjust their behavior to make Abby happy and cut down on the drama.

cheerspirit wrote:

Holly, though calm, always has a look of disdain on her face and speaks to Abby slightly condescending.

Cheerspirit you are right about that. I think that comes from her position as a principal at a school. It's hard to let it go. My mom was an educator (though not a principal) for 34 years and often she still talks to even my dad as if she is still in front of the black board. LOL.

I'll watch the show - having it on in the background when I'm doing other things. My husband keeps asking why I watch- I think because it's like a bad train wreck- you feel sorry and you want to look away but you can't.

While I don't agree on the Pyramid or yelling that Abby does I do believe she has all her best dancers at heart - it's about winning but she also seems to want them each to do their best.

The moms on the other hand are horrible. If I ever have any moms like those moms- they would be GONE from my studio.

The main reason I'm adding to the post- found this article that you all might like. Leslie on her experience with Dance Moms. For the moms it seems to be that 15 min of fame that has been so popular in the last 10 years - that's why you see so many reality/not reality shows on tv.
plum-oakmont.patch.com . . .

dancengroovegirl wrote:

I'll watch the show - having it on in the background when I'm doing other things. My husband keeps asking why I watch- I think because it's like a bad train wreck- you feel sorry and you want to look away but you can't.

While I don't agree on the Pyramid or yelling that Abby does I do believe she has all her best dancers at heart - it's about winning but she also seems to want them each to do their best.

The moms on the other hand are horrible. If I ever have any moms like those moms- they would be GONE from my studio.

The main reason I'm adding to the post- found this article that you all might like. Leslie on her experience with Dance Moms. For the moms it seems to be that 15 min of fame that has been so popular in the last 10 years - that's why you see so many reality/not reality shows on tv.
plum-oakmont.patch.com . . .

I don't understand wanting to be remembered for acting like a fool, but I guess some people don't care.

The networks love reality shows! Why? LOW COST! Hey, you don't need talent. You just have to act like a fool and get people talking. Jerry Springer found that out, years ago. CHEAP LABOR, like companies hiring illegal aliens on a street corner.

I don't understand wanting to be remembered for acting like a fool, but I guess some people don't care.

I've worked in TV, and I assure you that people do NOT care. Most people just want to be on TV. Period.

Panic is right. Look at American Idol, America's Got Talent, and the countless other reality shows where people make idiots out of themselves. Negative attention is better than no attention, in their eyes.

Oh, I know, Panic, I just don't understand it. I don't understand wanting to be famous, either.

As far as watching Toddlers and Tiaras. Those mothers are not trained professionals, just mothers. I watch it because I know some of the kids, and parents, so do not watch all of the shows.

We do about 2 or 3 natural pageants, with my granddaughter, and it's totally different, but some of the kids do both. They do highlight some of the nut jobs, there, but being a dance teacher acting like a fool and talking to kids that way, well, we are trained to do it right. We are trained to stop stage moms, hopefully. To have someone portrayed as not only allowing that stage mom attitude, but rewarding it, that bothers me, true or not. It makes my profession take a hit and gives more fire power to those who don't see dance as the art form that it truly is.

[q=Dream_chaser I watch it because I know some of the kids, and parents, so do not watch all of the shows.

Ah, well that makes a difference. I watched "Barney and Friends" until I was about 14 because I knew a girl who was one of the kids from community theater.

I'm starting to think Abby is like a pussy cat in comparison to some of the psycho parents!

I have a lot more respect for Holly... she seems to be the only level headed one, and seems a lot more rational when she talks to Abby and the other parents.

I just wonder HOW MUCH of how they act is truly them, or if they are just told to be that way for drama. I know, that I have read, on other shows, how they do that, or do they just feed off of what they already are.

I can't get why a principal of a school would want to put themselves out there, in such a way. I would have no respect for my local principal. It would be like the president on a reality show.