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Married Life
Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:21 AM

Oh do help. My husband won a work award so we get to go to San Diego for 3 days for an all expenses paid vacation with about 30 other employees from around the country.

Every evening, we have a mandatory reception/dinner the is business casual and I have NO IDEA what to wear.

I want my husband to be happy that I'm on his arm and look the "part" he needs me to, but I really don't know what to get. My wardrobe consists of summer dresses, flowy skirts, strappy tops, and either "recital super dress wear" or "I can leap in this skirt barefoot" wear.

Considering I'm not the employee, I don't know which guidelines to follow. It is San Diego and a Vacation, but it is also his career (and not mine). I don't want to spend a ton on clothes I would probably never wear again, but this really has to be thought out and I cannot for the life of me even put together an outfit in my head.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated:)

27 Replies to Proper attire for my husbands work outing???

re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By Theresamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 34891, member since Wed May 22, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:26 AM
Crazy idea - have you thought about making him go shopping with you?

If you want to look the part of the arm candy, there's no better person to ask than the person who owns the arm you're going to be on.

My husband picks out my dress for his company Christmas party every year - and as much as it drives me nuts (because never let it be said the guy doesn't have a style - plain black, nothing fancy...), I do look appropriately arm candy like, which is exactly what he wants.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:31 AM
I wish!!!! He doesn't even shop for himself. I pick out all of his clothes to his specifications. (And yes, I also return a lot of his clothes lol).

I asked him what I should wear because I didn't think my flowy, strapless attire would cut it and he said, "Don't you dare"...which I knew "not to dare" that's why I was asking him and then I got REALLY nervous. He's never had an opinion to what I wear because I don't normally look ridiculous. But now I know he's concerned, I'm even more worried.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By Sumayah Comments: 6875, member since Wed Nov 12, 2008
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:34 AM
Business casual is more tailored, it sounds like you have a lot of boho type clothing or super special event clothing. I'm of the opinion that every woman should own one good black skirt - pencil or straight - to the knee and a nice pair of slacks. You might check out the Gap for that sort of look. A nice tailored dress or skirt and camisole and cardigan or slacks and dressy tee with a scarf. Pieces you can integrate with your existing wardrobe but gives you some versatile pieces. You don't have to spend a lot for some great staple pieces.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing??? (karma: 1)
By LlamaLlamaDuckmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 7765, member since Sun Nov 21, 2004
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:42 AM
Edited by LlamaLlamaDuck (113868) on 2012-01-17 10:43:49
Heres a few links that I found.

www.google.ca . . . HpQ/rR4VrtDHtfw/s1600/Business-Casual-Boring-01.jpg&w=600&h=431&ei=brIVT6n6CKPV0QHmyrSZAw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=415&vpy=184&dur=2856&hovh=190&hovw=265&tx=177&ty=107&sig=104024717488189070547&page=1&tbnh=128&tbnw=176&start=0&ndsp=24&ved=1t:429,r:2,s:0

www.google.ca . . .

www.google.ca . . .

There is quite a range... I would say that you could even wear one of your sundresses if you put a cardigan or casual cropped blazer over top of it.

careerfashionblog.com . . . check down towards the bottom.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:10 AM
Thank you for the links....and it's exactly what I feared. Nothing I would ever wear!

When I look at sample outfits, or the pencil skirts at the Gap, I'm okay with it, but I don't want to over dress it, because I'm not the one being honored. Those clothes make me feel so stiff just looking at them.

It's like I need two worlds to mesh...the business world, and my world. Looks like I have to go start trying things on.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LlamaLlamaDuckmember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 7765, member since Sun Nov 21, 2004
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:13 AM
what are the summer dresses that you have like? There might be a way to make some of the stuff that you have work. If you have a tunic top it could be paired with a nice pair pants. Surely you have to have something that could be made to work with the addition of another piece?
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:40 AM
It's weird. For real. We are going to the Hotel Del Coronado on the beach. Hiking through Torrey Pines, kayaking to the caves, and then I have to put on a pencil skirt and blouse for dinner???!!

It's an award vacation--not business meetings, just welcome dinners, award dinners, and then farewell dinner. We can wear skirts to dinner, but no jeans, or jeans for the men either. I feel like it's vacation, not wardrobe prison LOL. It's just so odd to pack for. If other wives show up in sundresses and I end up in tweed I'm gonna be ticked off.

I think i have to go start playing in my closet.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By YumYumDoughnutPremium member Comments: 8688, member since Sat Jul 10, 2004
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:49 AM
Are you friendly with any of the wives? I would pack a proper outfit and a sundress, and ask the other wives what they are wearing when you guy mingle on vacation.

I would buy a proper outfit that you wouldn't mind wearing in the future. That way, it won't feel like a "waste". If you get a pencil skirt that is black, you may be able to pair it with your style in the future. Get a dress shirt that you wouldn't mind pairing with jeans.

I would personally take a big purse, and just throw a sundress in it for the evening. I have done "quick changes" in the car after seeing what other people are wearing.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing??? (karma: 2)
By Sumayah Comments: 6875, member since Wed Nov 12, 2008
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:59 AM
Edited by Sumayah (204191) on 2012-01-17 11:59:59
No one said you have to wear a suit or tweed. Here are some examples that I'd try if I had to attend the dinners you're suggesting.

A brown skirt and camisole you already own
Image hotlink - 'http://www.stylebakery.com/images/goodies/2005/071605/stylefinds.jpg'
Add a cardigan:
Image hotlink - 'http://www3.assets-gap.com/webcontent/0004/185/458/cn4185458.jpg'
Add some hot pink kitten heels or flats:
Image hotlink - 'http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQau1gDkrmh7sfTZrGAR9GcVMvDShrZ8cIBf_h9llktw2ebsp2TC1i_04SA'
And some fun chunky jewelry:
Image hotlink - 'http://www.enchantingjewels.com/images/thumbnails/Chunky-Pink-Murano-Glass-Necklace-Set.jpg'

You still keep your style but it's dressed up. Business casual doesn't have to be boring.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:18 PM
I love how appropriate the quick change idea is:)

I don't know anyone on this trip. It's the recipients for the annual award with his company and it's an internationally owned company. BUT, the CEO and very high up important people will be there with one on one time with my husband so this is a GREAT opportunity to keep his career moving up.

We followed this career to a new city and I passed on my Studio to my sister for all of this.

I feel like there is such a pressure on our image here in order to make great first impressions and use this networking tool for our future.

For example, the first photo with the cami and brown skirt is SOOOO me. BUT, I am a 36 year old with three kids who looks not quite 18 with long blonde hair and a baby face. I need a little bit of age here as my hub is graying and balding and can really make a push showing his maturity into a good position that will pay for the kids colleges in the next 6 years.

Funny pic? It gets better. He's 6'3" and I'm 5'1". So heels are a necessity and I feel will pull the outfits together as well. Oh yeah...and I need 3 awesome outfits...not just one.

Hence the dilemma. Being that I lived in leotards and sweats more than any other item, really shopping or thinking of an outfit of this magnitude is giving me anxiety.

I thank you all tons so far though. You have my head whirling in places is wasn't before, so it's really helpful.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing??? (karma: 1)
By YumYumDoughnutPremium member Comments: 8688, member since Sat Jul 10, 2004
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:27 PM
Going into a local clothing store and ask the women working there for help. Once I moved up from Forever 21, Wet Seal and started to shop at women shops, the ladies are such great help.

I went into " White House Black Market" and they helped me put together an outfit for any occasion. It is a lot less scary when you have the eyes of another woman helping you.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By Theresamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 34891, member since Wed May 22, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:27 PM
Seriously, you've shot down every answer you've gotten. You can't ask your husband, you don't know anybody, you can't afford to buy new clothes, you don't want to wear something that's your style...

...you either need to get your head in the game, or you need to beg out.

My standard day to day uniform consists of whatever t-shirt was hanging in my closet and looked clean, yoga pants and sneakers, and even I've got the ability to clean up and go out. It isn't like you don't know how, it's more like you don't want to.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By YumYumDoughnutPremium member Comments: 8688, member since Sat Jul 10, 2004
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:33 PM



How about something like this? I think white pants are ok in San Diego, even after labor day. I see a lot of women wearing white work pants in California.

It is resort looking, but it can also be Business Casual.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:41 PM
Theresa wrote:

Seriously, you've shot down every answer you've gotten. You can't ask your husband, you don't know anybody, you can't afford to buy new clothes, you don't want to wear something that's your style...

...you either need to get your head in the game, or you need to beg out.

My standard day to day uniform consists of whatever t-shirt was hanging in my closet and looked clean, yoga pants and sneakers, and even I've got the ability to clean up and go out. It isn't like you don't know how, it's more like you don't want to.



I have no idea how my posts sounded to you in your head, but you sorta just dropped the ball on that one.

I'm quite capable of putting together an outfit, but in this scenario, it is foreign to me. I'm not an office, coorporate, or city girl.


And YumYum, Thank you. I like the look of the pinstripe shirt in that photo.

Just pulled out the dress white pants, funny you mentioned it because I was wondering exactly that.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing??? (karma: 1)
By DefyingGravityPremium member Comments: 5265, member since Sun Jan 19, 2003
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:43 PM
Perfectly appropriate dresses from Macys that are on sale right now:

www1.macys.com . . .

www1.macys.com . . .

www1.macys.com . . .

www1.macys.com . . .

www1.macys.com . . .


I tried to find ones that more fit your "style." That said, I don't think Sumayah's skirt/cardigan/strappy tank would be appropriate for a work dinner reception that's business casual. That would be perfect for the day trip to the Coronado (having been there many times), but not the night reception.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By YumYumDoughnutPremium member Comments: 8688, member since Sat Jul 10, 2004
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:59 PM
Ok, please let us know if you already own these items.

Pants
1. Black Dress Pants
2. White Dress Pants
3. Grey Dress Pants
4. Tan Dress Pants

Skirts
1. Business Black Skirt ( so like a pencil skirt)
2. Business White Skirt

Shirts
1. What color "proper" ( Like the blue striped one in my picture)shirts do you own?
2. Do you own any Cami Tanks you can layer

Tops
1. Do you own Cardigans
2. Do you own any Brazers

Shoes
1. Closed toe black heels
2. Closed toe nude heels

Maybe we can help you put together an outfit from your own closet.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 12:59 PM
Thank you:) See that's where my confusion lies....what is appropriate.

When you look online, business casual guidelines are listed, but I feel it's geared specifically at the employee in a day to day scenario.

Defining that line is what I'm trying to find, while being cute, comfy, classy, hot enough but not too hot outfit and then playing to my assets instead of accentuating my flaws.

I have never been into fashion, but I'm a name brand whore who will pay for quality and longevity in my clothes. That's what I don't have money for...one time wears. Granted, I have it, I just don't feel good about spending it. I don't find it fun so I'm fashion challenged in a lot of ways.

I love the dress idea. For some reason, I was strictly thinking skirts.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By Sumayah Comments: 6875, member since Wed Nov 12, 2008
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 01:00 PM
Outfit 1
Spoiler: Show
Purchase:
Image hotlink - 'http://www2.assets-gap.com/Asset_Archive/GPWeb/Assets/Product/760/760950/big/gp760950-01vliv01.jpg'
Image hotlink - 'http://www1.assets-gap.com/webcontent/0004/185/318/cn4185318.jpg'
Add a fun sweater you already own:
Image hotlink - 'http://www.vintagetrends.com/thumbnails_/lot/609/609-1041.jpg'
And a pair of boots
Image hotlink - 'http://media.kohls.com.edgesuite.net/is/image/kohls/833269_Black?wid=1000&hei=1000&op_sharpen=1'
Earrings:
Image hotlink - 'http://i01.i.aliimg.com/photo/v0/110357731/Beaded_Chandelier_Earrings_Fashion_Jewelry_Victorian_Earrings.jpg'


Outfit 2
Spoiler: Show
A sundress you own:
Image hotlink - 'http://www.fashionhousevintage.com/wp-content/uploads/wpsc/product_images/20110910_42.jpg'
Purchase:
Image hotlink - 'http://www3.assets-gap.com/webcontent/0004/291/373/cn4291373.jpg'
Jewelry you own:
Image hotlink - 'http://www.beadage.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/jade-and-pearl-necklace.jpg'
Image hotlink - 'http://img1.etsystatic.com/il_fullxfull.241713405.jpg'
Fun heels:
Image hotlink - 'http://aamnaa.files.wordpress.com/2010/01/guess-blue-heels.jpg'


You get the idea. Play with what's in you closet and purchase a few pieces that will pull it from boho to more businessy. That way you retain your style without sacrificing the neat and tidy put together lets my husband a raise look.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By YumYumDoughnutPremium member Comments: 8688, member since Sat Jul 10, 2004
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 01:05 PM
Remember, it is better to be overdressed then underdressed. I think that people who are underdressed give off a worse impression then someone a little too put together.

Wear layers so you can either cover up if you are a sex toy, or take off a layer if you are too grandma. You can always take off jewelry.
For example, you can wear a blazer on top of the dresses that Defyinggravity posted. If you feel too "formal" you can take off that blazer and you become more casual.

I ALWAYS carry bobbypins, hair ties, red lipstick, eyeshadows if I need to boost up my image.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 01:06 PM
Okay, to YumYum:

Pants: 1 black dress pair, 1 white

Skirts: None

Shirts: none taylored, Cami's a couple

Cardigans: 2 but 1 gray long and navy traditional from the gap, very light weight

Shoes: Open toe black satin (White house black market) but very dressy. More Semi-formal.


If you asked me how much Steeler gear I had, I'd be typing forever. (LOL see what we are dealing with:)
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 01:08 PM
I get it I think. Off to play in my closet. I'll let you know how it turns out.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By imadanseurPremium member Comments: 16604, member since Thu Dec 04, 2003
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 02:26 PM
I'm quite capable of putting together an outfit, but in this scenario, it is foreign to me. I'm not an office, coorporate, or city girl.


I'm a dance teacher and professional dancer from South Dakota. I've been able to come up with 3 outfits in a similar situation...stop over thinking this. You seem like a smart person and you aren't coming off that way in some of your posts on this thread.

Use some common sense, go more dressy than not (jewelry and shoes can take an outfit to a different level), and this won't be a "one time wear" if you will have to continue to socialize with his company so consider a new outfit an investment. Good quality well tailored clothes NEVER go out of style.
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing??? (karma: 2)
By kandykanePremium member Comments: 16415, member since Mon May 01, 2006
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 02:31 PM
Edited by kandykane (157761) on 2012-01-17 14:40:52
I breezed over most of the replies, so if this has already been stated, consider it redundant.

You need a little black dress. A simple, basic cut that can be dressed up with heels and jewelry and accessories or dressed down with flats and bare legs or turned into business attire with a nice jacket. Obviously, this is not going to take care of every night, but every woman needs a LBD. I have a dozen.

kk~
re: Proper attire for my husbands work outing???
By LovelyRitaPremium member Comments: 1675, member since Tue Nov 19, 2002
On Tue Jan 17, 2012 06:27 PM
Edited by LovelyRita (49758) on 2012-01-17 18:28:39
Edited by LovelyRita (49758) on 2012-01-17 18:29:25
Imadanseur and Theresa,

Seriously, you have both taken the moderator thing to a new level. I have perused DDN in the last year an a half since the move but I have not been actively Studio Directing or Teaching, therefore, I have been away more often than not.

I make one post in the last however how long, and you both degrade me in your posts.

I swear you are here just to feel good about yourself as opposed to helping others. Ya know, or JUST MODERATING THE BOARDS.

For real. If this is what DDN has become, I may never return. God forbid someone asks a question. If I need someones attitude, I'll hang out with my teenage daughter.

You can take your advice and do you know what with it. For those of you kind enough to actually help. Many many thanks.


And I say this because I seem like a smart person.
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