Here we go again! New diary, same me.

New to the program? Here are the basics. I'm Jonelle. I'm 30 years old. My husband is Mark. My dogs are Layla and Achilles. My cat is Lewis. I work full-time. Mark is in school full-time and works part-time. We rent a house. We live in Indiana. I love reading and crafting and the Colts and various assorted other things which will become apparent if you spend much time at all reading this thing, which I hope you will.

I couldn't work out how I wanted to capitalize the title, so I went with a non-capitalized title. It's a lyric from MGMT's "Electric Feel." You should take a listen, but be prepared for silly psychedelic nonsense in the video:



I'm on a mission to update this thing every day in 2012, so I hope you'll enjoy your daily dose of... Jonelle-ness, I guess.

... And away we go!

EDIT: Oh. Jesus. I completely forgot that Rock-afire Explosion (A.K.A. The Showbiz Pizza Animatronic Band) makes an appearance in this video. Well. That settles it, doesn't it? Now you HAVE to watch.

First comment!

I love Electric feel. That song is just so sexy to me.

^Yeah, I know what you mean. There's just something about it. It's my happy-joyful-dancing music, so every time I update my diary, I'll get a little dose of happiness.

*****

Last night I made another new recipe. Crab scramble, which was a ton of eggs, mixed with crab meat, dill weed, and cream cheese. It was good, but man, there is just something about a meal with no carbs that is profoundly unsatisfying. I found myself eating a bowl of cereal just a couple of hours later. I think if I make it again, I need to get some pita bread to stuff it in.

Then we watched this crazy show about hallucinogenic drugs, and then I vented to Mark a bit about work, and about not having any idea where my life is headed, and about having no motivation to do much of anything lately. We determined that I was "wintering," which is a term I made up for when I'm being overtaken by winter blahs. Then we went to bed.

Today Mark got up early to take the trash out, because today is trash day. He was just making me really grumpy, because it seemed like everywhere I needed to be to get ready for work, he was RIGHT THERE. And then he was being grumpy because his head hurt. So then we were both being grumpy, and I totally misunderstood something he said, and we started arguing, and it was just... ugh. So then I was late to work. Well, later than I like to be. I don't really have a set time when I have to be here. So then all the good parking spaces were gone, and I had to park far away from the doors. Then I couldn't find my umbrella, and I didn't really have enough hands to carry it anyway, so I slogged across the parking lot in the pouring rain, and my shoes got completely soaked. I mean, COMPLETELY soaked. It was just a lovely morning.

But then when I got to work, Mark e-mailed me, and we got some things straightened out. He is just so unfailingly kind and considerate to me, and so completely and wholly accepting of everything about me, that I just couldn't stay in a bad mood anymore.

I did go to lunch with co-workers today. It was okay. I don't recall there being any man-bashing, so that was good, but I also had nothing to say to about 90% of what they were talking about. Surely they are just inviting me along to be nice at this point, because I know I don't add much to their conversations.

Then I had a meeting with my boss, and as a result of some things we talked about, I realized that I am always thinking of myself as working FOR people, when, in most cases, it would be more appropriate to think of myself as working WITH them. The problem is that when I have the attitude that I'm working FOR them, I tend not to speak up when I sense that they are making decisions that I really should be a part of. But as someone who is actually working WITH them, I need to say something, because they shouldn't be doing that. I have a feeling that my lack of assertiveness is going to come up during my annual review this year.

And that's pretty much it for my day so far. Work is continuing to be incomprehensibly boring for the most part, so I'm just trying to fill up my time as best as I can until I can get out of here. I plan on hitting up the gym right after work, but I forgot my shin wrap, so we'll see how it goes. I don't want to push myself too much if it starts to hurt, but I also don't want to waste time stopping home to get it.

I put a "days left" widget on my phone, and I have it set up to count down to the first day of spring. 54 days! I also still have the one that I put on there to count down to the wedding. Now that the wedding is past, it counts "days since," and I just can't seem to bring myself to delete it. 131 days since, in case you were wondering.

More immediate: 1 hour and 45 minutes until I can leave work. If I can only stay awake until then...

I've totally heard that song, I just had no idea it was MGMT. I feel smarter now.

My therapist gave me some assertiveness exercises back when I started working with her. If you want them, PM me. It involves a lot of role playing.

^Sure, why not? Send them my way! And thank you!

*****

I headed to the gym after work yesterday, and everything was fine. No shin splints. I really hate wrapping my shin because I feel like it makes my muscles even tighter when I'm running. So I'd like to do without it, but I think I'm going to need it again for running on the roads. I really wish I had another option, like a dirt trail, but the only dirt trails I know of are the ones at the park, and they are very uneven. So running on those is actually what got my shin splints to the point that I had to stop running altogether over the summer. It would be nice if I lived in a city that was a bit more exercise-friendly. Maybe someday.

Last night I made yet another new recipe. I forget what it was called, but it was basically whole wheat pasta, fake crab meat, pea pods, and fresh parsley mixed together, plus some other ingredients for flavor. It was delicious and easy.

I weighed myself again today, and it was a pound less than last week. So, still four pounds more than what I'd like, but that's okay. I didn't cry or freak out or become disgusted with myself. I just took it as, "Okay, now I know where I'm at, and I know what I need to work on." I don't think I have EVER taken weight gain this easily in stride, at least not since I've been an adult. So, yay! Progress! I really would like to lose the weight, though, so I'll see how I do with just making some easy changes that I know I need to make anyway, and I'll go from there.

Mark is getting his tattoo worked on today. I'm excited for him. Can't wait to see what it looks like!

^Have you tried different shoes? I recently got a new pair of running shoes because my knee and shins were hurting a lot while working out, and I can't believe the difference. Maybe the shoe just isn't the right shoe for you?

^You actually reminded me that I was planning on getting a new pair of shoes right around now. It's possible that mine are just getting worn out. I haven't been tracking my mileage like I should, so I actually don't know how many miles I've run in my current shoes.

*****

I did have to use my shin wrap yesterday. I started out with it pretty loose but ended up having to tighten it because my shin was starting to hurt. Today it's okay though, so at least it's not just chronic pain all the time, which is how it started to get last summer.

I invited my parents over to my house for coffee last night. I don't know why I hardly ever invite them over, but I was just in the mood for company last night. Then Mark got back from the tattoo shop. The tattoo looks really good so far, but I think it's going to take a lot longer than we originally thought, so I decided to give him more money to help pay for it. My original intent was always to pay for the whole thing, but I just didn't realize at first the extent of the work he was going to have done. I think he's still going to end up paying for some of it, but we'll see.

Today I went to the gym and walked on the treadmill for a while because I didn't want to run for three days in a row. It's funny how walking works a whole different group of muscles than running. I'm actually pretty sore right now from the walking. (500) Days of Summer was on the TV at the gym, so I watched most of it and finished it when I got home. Not bad, not bad at all.

Mark came home from work, and we went out for Mexican food. Then we went to the sporting goods store, and I decided to try on a pair of Brooks shoes in addition to trying on the updated version of the Nike Pegasus, which is what I've been wearing since last year. The girl at the store helped me find a more suitable pair of Brooks shoes than the ones I originally tried on, and ultimately I ended up buying those instead of the Nike Pegasus. So I now own a brand new pair of Brooks Ghost running shoes, and we'll see if new shoes help my shin splints. I am definitely going to start tracking my mileage in these new shoes, so that I can easily tell when it's time for a new pair. I also bought a compression sleeve for my shin, so that hopefully I don't have to mess around with elastic bandages anymore, and I bought a new fleece-lined hat, because the one I have right now comes down over my eyes if I pull it down all the way. Oh, and I bought some cushioned socks. So I think I'm good on running equipment for a while.

We got our latest electric bill, and it was pretty astronomical. So we are going to start keeping the thermostat way lower and see what happens, because this just cannot continue.

And that's all from this corner of the world. Now we are apparently going to watch UFC fights. Awesome. Guess I'll be pulling out my book for the next little while.

Not much to report here. My Chihuahua bit my face last night, so that sucked. It actually left a mark and was just all-around very upsetting. He was sitting by the fireplace, and an ember fell on him, so I was checking him to make sure he didn't get burned, and I guess I was making him nervous, so he bit me. Whatever, I don't want to spend a lot of time dwelling on it. It happened, and I pretty much know why it happened, but it still sucks.

My hamstrings, glutes, and shins were a bit sore today, so I decided to give the working out a rest. We really just didn't do much at all today. We made it to the grocery store, and then a couple of hours ago we went to my parents' house and had cake for my sister and brother-in-law's anniversary. And that was it for today.

After a little more than two weeks of eating healthy (except for the cake tonight), I am DYING for some junk food. I can't stop thinking about just completely devouring a big plate of cheese fries with ranch sauce. OM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM. We are going downtown to take a peek at the Super Bowl festivities on Wednesday, so maybe there will probably be an opportunity to have a cheat meal then, if there's anything worth having. Don't get me wrong; I love eating stuff that's actually good for me, but sometimes I just want something a bit... deep fried.

So today is our first day of having the thermostat set on 62°F from 10:00 PM until 4:00 PM. I'll say this - I sure got dressed in a hurry this morning! I guess it really wasn't TOO bad. I went to bed dressed in a tank top with a sweatshirt over it, sweatpants, and thick socks, and added an extra bedspread. I woke up after a while and got rid of the extra bedspread and stripped down to my undies and tank top, then woke up again an hour later and put the sweatpants and sweatshirt back on. So when I put it that way, it sounds like I was really having a hard time, but waking up multiple times per night is normal for me anyway. So... whatever. *shrug* If this is what it takes to get our electric bill down to a reasonable cost, so be it.

I downloaded an app called Endomondo Sports that's supposed to track my mileage for me when I work out. It also gives you vocalized encouragement, so that should be fun. I got Mark to put all my music onto my phone, so I'm good to go. So today I will be trying out new shoes, new socks, a new shin sleeve, and a new phone app. Exciting stuff!

One of the phone reps at work asked me today if I lived in [my neighborhood]. I said that I did, and she said she lived there too and thought she had seen me out walking. That makes me feel slightly weird, that people I work with might be seeing me working out. But it also kind of makes me feel like that's just extra motivation to work hard, so I don't look like I'm just out there accomplishing nothing. OR I could also, you know, STOP CARING SO MUCH WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK. That would work too.

I had an excellent opportunity to have a cheat meal today. They were serving a fried seafood meal at the cafeteria for lunch. But I stayed strong and just ate the food I'd brought from home. I have a feeling I would have just ended up being disappointed that I'd wasted a cheat meal on cafeteria food from work, and then I probably would have had a stomachache on top of it.

I also have to confess that I have been participating in a little bit of petty drama at work today. Sometimes I just get bored, I guess. Nothing serious, just telling my co-workers that they have apparently been "cut" from the list of people in our department who get asked if they want to participate in departmental pitch-ins. As far as why they got removed from the list, I have no idea, but I'm 99.9% sure it was intentional. I probably should have just kept my mouth shut and minded my own business, but that's just the kind of thing that happens in offices sometimes that's just so silly and weird that I can't help but want to tell people so we can all laugh about how silly and weird it is. Maybe all jobs are like this. I really wouldn't know. But I can say for a fact that when it comes to pitch-ins in offices, things get serious. A lot more serious than I would ever have thought possible, given that we're all grown-ups.

^A pitch in for what?

Food. I think in your corner of the world, they are probably more commonly called "pot lucks," although I've been told by our Green Bay co-workers that up there they call them "pig-outs."

Ah, yes! We do call them potlucks down here. Usually when we do one they just ask everyone to either sign up or pay $5 to buy something. Of course, if you don't bring something or pay, you don't eat.

As for caring what other people think, I feel ya. I think we have a lot of the same mental issues. Go team? Also, I totally forgot to send you the assertiveness exercises. I'll do that when I get home & find the sheet.

^It's no problem. Whenever you have a minute. I appreciate it!

*****

So the new shoes and all that did not seem to magically make my shin splints disappear, but that's okay. I didn't really think they would. The shin sleeves are not as tight as how I usually wear the elastic bandage, so I ended up wearing both of them, one over the other, on my left leg, which is the one that's been giving me problems. And it still twinged a bit yesterday, but it was manageable. The new fitness app on my phone is okay. I think I still like the Nike Plus app better in a lot of ways, but I like that this uses GPS to track my mileage, so that way I know that it's accurate. With Nike Plus, because of the way it uses your stride to measure distance, I was never quite sure it was right.

Okay, but let's talk about the WEATHER for a second. Running! Outside! In short sleeves! In January!! This is just... amazing. If every Indiana winter were like this, I'd be set. But alas, we all know that's not true. But I am loving every second of this while it lasts.

Last night I made the decision to be less dependent on Mark for validation and just work on being more independent in general. For example, any time we're both home, I have a tendency to put everything on hold and just focus on spending time with him. And that's okay... sometimes. But when it starts getting in the way of me doing things that I want/need to do, it's a problem. And as far as the validation thing goes, I have such a bad habit of telling Mark about every little thing I do, for no other reason so that he can tell me I did a good job. Again, not the worst thing in the world, to share with your partner and look for support and encouragement, but it's just been getting ridiculous. "Honey, guess what? I cleaned the bathroom! Honey, I ate a healthy lunch. Honey, I worked out today." I don't need to tell him every. little. thing. just so he can make me feel good about myself. I need to be able to look to myself for that type of positive feedback.

Oh, by the way, we made awesome sandwiches for dinner last night. Avocado spread, provolone, tomatoes, and alfalfa sprouts on a baguette. Well, that was mine. Mark's was a little different, but mine was better.

Today was my work-from-home today, and I got a ton of cleaning done around the house. I cleaned the bathrooms and the kitchen, cleaned the tiled floors by hand (because I don't think the mop works that well), and vacuumed. The only thing I didn't do was dust, so I'll try to get to that on Thursday. Woohoo, clean house!

I worked out again after work today, and I was afraid my shin was going to act up because of working out two days in a row, so I decided to wrap it extra tightly. So I put on the elastic bandage, and then I put one of the shin sleeves on top of that. And that was just complete overkill. My foot actually started to go numb toward the end of the workout, and now my soleus muscle is ridiculously sore because of being wrapped so tightly. But hey, at least my shin doesn't hurt! So obviously I'm still working things out with that.

I got an e-mail today that said that we get to dress down at work for the entire month of February. That's pretty much the best news I've gotten at work in months. Must. Not. Wear. Hoodies. Every. Day. But seriously, as much as I might like to, that's just not a great image to project at work, that I just can't be bothered to put together anything resembling a real outfit. So I'll try my best, I suppose.

Dinner tonight was whole wheat couscous with grape tomatoes, olives, parsley, and feta cheese, and then I added some tofu for extra protein. I've been loving all of these healthy, tasty meals, but they just do not do a very good job of filling me up. I mean, I don't need to be stuffed, but I'm still a little hungry after a lot of these dinners, unless I just eat humongous portions. So I need to work on that a little, see what I can do to make them more filling, or see what sorts of healthy sides I can add.

So that's it for today. We're supposed to walk around downtown tomorrow night and see all the Super Bowl stuff, so I hope this stupid soreness in my leg doesn't make that difficult. Positive thinking!

Maybe you should consider finding some wool or cotton blazers? I have some blazers that are seriously as comfortable as a hoodie, that I got I think at Filene's Basement or Marshalls. One of those and flats instead of sneakers turns a jeans and a basic tee outfit into something that looks far more presentable.

So sorry your shins are still hurting! That must be so frustrating. Have you tried freezing little dixie cups full of water and then "unwrapping" part of the ice and massaging your shins with them? That helped some of the girls on my cross country team that were having trouble with shin splints.

I know what you mean about the healthier food being less filling. I think for me my problem was I was used to eating this big heavy dinners that made me feel REALLY full, so eating lighter fare was strange. I've been drinking more water and I think my mind is slowly learning that being not hungry is not the same as being full, but it's a better and healthier feeling. I'm also slowly working towards 6 small meals a day, and I have to say I'm definitely not hungry all the time anymore.

Just got back from Super Bowl Village! Lots to say, but it'll have to wait until tomorrow, because right now it's bedtime.

Goodnight, DDN!

Okay, first things first. Nienna, I want to reply to you before I forget.

Blazers - Meh. I had a couple a while back, but I wasn't crazy about them, and I can't really explain why. I do a lot better with cardigans, but for some reason I still always want to reach for the hoodie. Always. I literally just have to force myself not to do it, and that's that.

Shins - Do you know if there's any advantage to the Dixie cup thing versus a regular ice pack? Is it the rolling action? I do put an ice pack on it after I work out, or at least I try to, if I remember.

Food - You know that feeling when you're not hungry right that moment, but you can tell that you will be in an hour or so? That's how I've been feeling after a lot of these meals. Having fruit or something for dessert should help though, I think.

*****

So yeah, last night we did the Super Bowl Village thing. It was Mark, his mom, and me, and we were there for about three hours or so, maybe a little less. It was definitely packed, but I was expecting that, and crowds don't really bother me. Although if I'm going to be in a crowd, I'd rather be alone so that I don't have to worry about losing the people I'm with, or not being able to just stop and look at something without getting everyone's attention, etc. So that was slightly aggravating me last night, but whatever, no big deal.

I guess there's not a WHOLE lot to say about what we did, because most of what we did was just walking around. First we were walking around looking for food, and that got slightly awkward, because we found where they had a whole buffet set up in the mall, but it was pretty much all meat. And, I don't know, I guess I just don't want to be THAT girl who's like, "Oh, um, we can't eat here because I don't eat meat." But I was probably just making things extra awkward, because obviously Mark knows I'm not eating meat, but his mom doesn't, and I didn't want to say anything, but I also didn't want to eat the meat, and then Mark didn't want to eat there because I didn't want to eat there, so it just got stupid. So instead of eating, we went upstairs and wandered around forever so Mark's mom could get a shirt.

Then we started looking for food again, and finally we found some soft pretzels, so we got that. So I felt a little sad because I'd been looking forward to my cheat meal, and it ended up being a stupid stale pretzel. Then we walked some more, and we saw this really cool ice sculpture. And then we walked some more, and I saw where they were selling potatoes with chili topping, and I thought it was just beans, and it looked REALLY good, so I bought one. But it did have meat, so I just tried to push all the meat to the side. Because I've decided to be official about this now and not half-ass it, so I was kind of mad that I ended up eating a little bit of meat, but it's not the end of the world.

So we kept walking while I was eating my potato, and then finally we got to the Soldiers and Sailors Monument, which is like our definitive downtown Indianapolis... thing. And they have these giant Roman numerals set up in front of it (XLVI for Super Bowl XLVI), which I'd seen about a million pictures of on my Facebook news feed, but what the pictures don't show very well is that each letter is a video screen, and they were showing old football videos and stuff. Okay, that sounds really lame, but it wasn't. It was awesome, albeit slightly cheesy.

Then we went around the corner and wandered into this little secondhand shop that sold primarily teapots and teacups. I saw a couple of things I think my mom would like, but they cost more than I felt like spending at that particular moment, so we left. Also, every space in the shop where you could walk was approximately 18 inches wide. I can't believe we all made it out of there without destroying anything. Or everything, for that matter. Maybe that's their tactic - to get you to break stuff so you have to buy it.

So then we slowly started wandering back toward our car, but when we were almost there, I saw a bunch of people congregated around something, so I wanted to check it out. It turned out to be a booth with a glass wall where they were taping some shows for ESPN. There was a large flat-screen monitor outside, and it said NFL Semanal, so I thought, Okay, cool, they're taping a Spanish-language program. So sure enough, once all the sportscasters were miked up and we could hear them (they had their backs to us, and yes, they really do wear jeans under the desk), they were speaking Spanish. So then pretty much everyone in the crowd got annoyed and left, and I was kind of annoyed that everyone was annoyed. I wanted to stay and watch more, but Mark said we had to go because his mom had to use the restroom, so once again I was getting aggravated that we had to stick together. So it was really about time to go by then, because I was getting tired and irritable.

BUT! I feel like I'm not capturing the actual spirit of Super Bowl Village. It was just... intense. And surreal. Considering our downtown nightlife is usually pretty lame, it was just amazing to see all those people walking around, partying, having fun, enjoying our city. It was awesome. But not rowdy at all, surprisingly enough. And it was just weird, because we kept passing restaurants and stores and things that are ordinarily just so familiar to us, but we barely even knew where we were at any given time. Everything was just completely transformed. There were colored lights everywhere, and projections on the sides of buildings, and enormous banners and billboards, and all kinds of temporary shops and bars. Lots and lots of tents, and street performers, and concert stages, and huge video screens. And, of course, the zip line, which we did not do, because tickets have been selling out each day by late morning/early afternoon.

So it really just made me swell up with pride in my city for a bit, and that's a cool feeling, because a lot of times I'm stuck halfway in between loving Indianapolis because it's my home and hating it because it's kind of lame. I think I've used this analogy before, but you know that annoying relative that you only love because you're related to them, but god forbid anyone else says they're annoying, because if they do, you will defend that obnoxious S.O.B. to the death? That's how I feel about Indianapolis sometimes. But not last night. Last night I just loved it. So it was worth going for that alone.

Oh, hey, remember a few paragraphs up when I said there wasn't a whole lot to say about what we did? WHOOPSIE.

*****

Then we got home and we had some stupid conversation that started when I said that I think it's weird that when I say something to Mark, his mom says, "What?" even though I wasn't talking to her. So he said, "Well, I think she just wants to hear what you say to me because otherwise she won't get to talk to you much," and that just annoyed me to no end. Like I said - tired and irritable. But damn, I just get so sick of feeling like everyone in the world just wants me to TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK all the time. News flash, people: I'm not that interesting! I just want to be who I am (i.e. a person who doesn't talk for the sake of talking, only when they actually have something to say) and have that be okay with everyone.

But now I'm getting all wound up again. Whatever. It's not worth getting upset over.

So today Mark woke up early to take the trash out again, and it went MUCH better than last week, mainly because neither of us were being cranky-pants like last week. Work was good because I actually got to use my brain a bit today, and I also MIGHT MIGHT MIGHT have solved the ergonomics thing, because my shoulder did not hurt as much today as yesterday. I also had my first ever Boca Burger today. It was awesome! Very meaty-tasting, except not as greasy and gross as meat.

I got in a workout when I got home, but now my feet are SO sore from all the walking last night and then running again today, so I might need to take a break tomorrow. And by god, I am NOT giving in to the temptation to weigh myself, because it's only been one week, and there's no way I've lost any significant weight in a week.

I did the double-shin-sleeve technique again today, but my foot started to go numb again. I'm thinking I might be okay after my legs have a chance to rest and recover, but I guess next time I can TRY just one shin sleeve and see how it goes, even though I really don't trust it to get the job done.

All right, this has gotten really long, so I'm going to wrap things up for tonight. Hope you all enjoyed your vicarious trip to Super Bowl Village! Goodnight!

That sounds awesome! Makes me kinda wish I was gonna go visit my friend in Bloomington again.

The Dixie cup method helps more than an ice pack, I think, because you're actively massaging your shins with the ice, and the massage is as helpful as the ice. Have you tried a bath with epsolm salts?

Have you considered seeing a podiatrist about your shin splints? I just caught myself thinking about it today, surely there's something you can do to relieve the pain? It just seems like it's affecting your workouts and just general comfort enough to see if maybe you need a different support in your shoe, or to be analyzed to see if maybe your gait is affecting your shins. I just don't know that them hurting that much is normal! I used to run cross country for my high school and I was running on average about 6 miles a day and was only bothered by shin splints when I was in more intense training.

If you want me to stop commenting on your diary so much please just let me know. I feel like I must get so annoying.

^If she doesn't want you, I'll have you. I get 59-75 views a day and no one comments. Anywhoo...

Are you not eating meat because you don't like it or some other reason? You really need that protein to rebuild your muscles. If not, you're just screwing your body. I don't want to be mean, but it's the cold, hard facts. Vegetarians rarely get enough protein to support an active lifestyle. Running and walking tear up a lot of muscle. You're doing yourself a disservice based on what I'm reading...

Woo, I love my commenters! Never worry about overdoing it! If I wanted a diary where no one ever answered me back, I'd go on LiveJournal or something, you know?

Okay, so I feel I've been a bit remiss in not elaborating on a few things. I have a tendency to be very verbose when I'm writing things out, so sometimes I think I skip over things that I probably shouldn't in an effort to be more concise.

The story with the shin splints is that they started when I re-started ballet (2008), but I didn't recognize them for what they were because they were so mild, so I never did anything about them. I stopped dancing in May of 2010 and did various assorted things to keep in shape for the rest of that year, then started doing Couch to 5K in March of 2011. By the time I finished C25K, I had a full-blown shin splint issue in my left leg, although I still didn't recognize that that was the problem for a while, because my shin splints are always on the inside of my leg, and I was under the impression that shin splints were only on the top of the leg. So by the time I started trying to wrap it, ice it, etc, it was already very painful. I switched to running on dirt paths at the park, thinking that would help, but that was the last straw. The unevenness of the dirt trails killed my shin to the point that it hurt even when I wasn't running, and I had to stop running altogether. I switched to walking for a while, then started up running again in November, and within a couple of weeks, I had really bad shin splints in my right leg. Took some time off again in December, started up again a few weeks ago, and so far have only had VERY mild pain in my left shin.

So this time around, I am DETERMINED not to let things get as bad as the last two times. I have been wrapping my shin before pretty much every workout, even if I haven't been having any pain, I've been stretching my calves like crazy, and any time I have even the slightest twinge of discomfort in my shin, I ice it ASAP. My understanding, based on a lot of reading, is that (1) if you consisently wrap the affected shin, you actually can heal shin splints while continuing to train, and (2) it takes up to six weeks for shin splints to heal. So I'm hoping and praying that if I do this right, I can get my left leg to heal up and finally be pain-free, but I know I have to be super careful. My mistake was not wrapping my shin for a couple of workouts where I wasn't having any pain, so I need to not do that anymore, because there's just no way that my shin healed that quickly. Even if they're not flaring up, the shin splints are still there, and if I'm not going to stop running altogether, then I need to do things the right way.

So, my point in going through this whole backstory is to say that I'm actually having minimal pain, or, in some cases, no pain at all, but I'm so paranoid about the pain getting really bad again that I'm spending a LOT of time figuring out how to not let that happen. So it probably seems like I'm having these horrible chronic shin splints, and I'm really not. BUT if I want to keep it that way, I need to be really careful. Hence the preoccupation with wrapping and so forth.

*****

As far as the pescetarianism goes, my reasons for doing it are about evenly split between ethical/environmental concerns, health concerns, and just flat-out not liking meat. I've toyed around with the idea of going vegetarian ever since I read Fast Food Nation in college, but I just kept being too lazy to actually make the change in my lifestyle. Also, I LOVE seafood, particularly shellfish, and I don't know if I could ever give that up. But for the past few years, I've been slowly eliminating a lot of meat-based dishes from my diet because of issues with IBS, so it just seemed like everything was pointing toward pescetarianism as the right thing for me to do. I don't have to feel guilty about supporting the livestock industry, I still get to eat seafood, I cut out almost all of the food that triggers my IBS, and I get to explore all kinds of new, healthy foods and recipes.

I do believe that people who don't eat meat can maintain an active lifestyle, but I also am aware that it takes extra planning and effort. I had two vegan cross country runners as roommates in college, and I've known at least three other vegetarians who were avid runners. I don't know for an absolute fact that these people were all getting all the protein they needed, but they were all people who were very respectful of their bodies, so I tend to think that they were making sure that they were getting all the nutrients they needed. But again, it's not like they sat around all day eating french fries and cheese pizza and than got up and ran for six miles. I know that what they did took planning and dedication, and I know it's going to be that way for me too.

It's a work in progress, for sure. I'm just starting out on this journey, so I know I have a long way to go before I get everything figured out. Protein intake is definitely a concern. I put a protein tracker app on my phone, so I'll be using that to help me make sure I'm getting enough, and I've also been reading up on complete versus incomplete proteins. Fortunately, soy is a complete protein, so a lot of meat substitute products are great protein sources, and so is tofu, and I'll also still be eating fish, eggs, and dairy. I'll need to spend more time than ever before looking up recipes and planning my meals and snacks, and I'm thinking I probably need to get back into taking a daily multi-vitamin. And, you know, there's always the chance that this will end up not working for me, in which case I'm not going to be stubborn and sacrifice my health.

Secret confession time: My dream job is to be a registered dietician. I don't usually talk about it because I've had so many other "dream jobs" that I tried to pursue and then gave up on, but I've had this one in the back of my mind for a while, and if I ever get the chance to go back to school, I want to study dietetics. So all this research about food and nutrients and protein sources and whatnot is actually really fascinating and fun for me. Nerdy or what?

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So there you have it. I realize no one asked for these long, drawn-out explanations, but I figure, if nothing else, I want to have it on record for myself, in case I ever want to go back and see exactly what I was thinking at this point in time. So I hope that helps to alleviate any concerns about my well-being. You guys are pretty awesome, actually caring about little old me and wanting to make sure I don't end up crippled for life.

I also should mention that I have a routine doctor's appointment on the 15th, so there's a good chance that I'll be bringing up both the shin splints and the diet change with my doctor to see if he has any advice. I'll keep everyone posted.

I think it's great that you're making dietary changes that sound like they'll work well for you, but I just wanted to comment on this -

soy is a complete protein, so a lot of meat substitute products are great protein sources

While fermented soy products like tofu are really great, I would encourage you to do some more research on processed soy (e.g. what is found in meat substitutes and a ton of other packaged foods). A lot of the research shows that processed soy is pretty terrible health-wise (as opposed to fermented soy, which is awesome!), and in terms of environmental concerns, the soy going into fake-meat products and such is almost always GMO soy, which has a lot of other implications.

Again, not trying to criticize your choices, but I just wanted to point that out as something you might be interested in looking into

^No problem, I appreciate the feedback. Like I said, I'm still learning! I'm really not interested in using a ton of meat substitutes because I try to steer away from processed foods in general, but I like knowing that it's an option if I'm in a pinch and need a quick meal idea. I really doubt it'll come up very often, though, and I'm certainly not going to make a point to stock my freezer with meat substitute products.

Oof, definitely can't fault you for trying to quell the IBS. I've never had it, but I've heard it's miserable.

I'm feeling tired and not really in the mood to write much, so I'll keep it brief (well, brief by my standards)...

Last night was a big shopping night. First we went out for Thai food, then we went to T-Mobile and got cases for our phones, then GameStop so Mark could get a game, then Best Buy so I could get a trackball mouse (my latest attempt to solve my shoulder issue at work), and finally Barnes & Noble for cookbooks. I got three vegetarian cookbooks and one seafood cookbook. I am VERY excited to start making all these new recipes. And by the time we got home from doing all that, I was pretty tired, so I just went to bed.

I've spent most of today perusing Vegetarian Cooking for Dummies. I did get out and do a quick walk around the neighborhood, but the weather was pretty crappy, so I didn't feel motivated to do more than that. We were invited to go downtown to Super Bowl Village again with Mark's friends, and at first we were going to go, but they ended up not going until 7:00 PM. I thought they were going to go a lot earlier than that, but when I found out it wasn't until 7:00 PM, I didn't want to go anymore. I'm sure it's absolutely insane down there at this time of night, the night before the Super Bowl, and, like I said, the weather kind of sucks. So we stayed home and watched UFC fights instead.

I REALLY need to get some decent food in the house. Tonight we got Taco Bell because we just have nothing good to eat. We'll be going to the store tomorrow. I need to be careful not to go overboard with buying a ton of perishable food that I think I'll need for my new diet and then end up not eating before it goes bad.

All right, there is some sort of TERRIBLE movie on TV and I'm in charge of the remote now, so I need to do something ASAP. Happy Super Saturday, DDNers!

Today was productive!

I spent the morning looking through my new cookbooks, trying to find recipes that would use up at least some of the random veggies we have in the fridge already. Found three I liked, got dressed, and off we went to the grocery store. In addition to ingredients for the recipes I picked, I also got some other assorted healthy goodies, such as soy milk, Bear Naked granola, and rice cakes. Mark wants to make Caesar salad this week, and he's putting chicken in his portion, so I'm going to try tempeh in my portion. My first experiment with tempeh!

I am having so much fun with this! I love food, and I love cooking.

So then we got home, and I spent a bit of time prepping ingredients for a couple of this week's dinners. I figured doing it when I was relaxed and not pressed for time would make things go more smoothly when it's time to actually cook the meals and chances are I'll be hungry and impatient. Went for a workout, came back, showered, ate dinner, then made some food that I can take to work for lunch tomorrow (egg/potato/green onion/tomato salad, if anyone's interested). Cleaned up the kitchen, and now I'm sitting here watching the Super Bowl and wishing the Patriots weren't winning.

So that was today. Lots of food-oriented stuff, but now I shouldn't need to think about it much for the rest of the week, hopefully.

Oh man, this is it for the Giants. It's make-it-or-break-it time. Guess I should probably HOLY CRAP DID YOU JUST SEE THAT CATCH MARIO MANNINGHAM OOOOOHHHHH MYYYYYYY GOOOOOOODDDDD!!!!

I gotta go.

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EDIT: Well, how 'bout that?

MANNING POWER!!!!!!!!!!