Forum: Advice / GLBT PG-13

GLBT PG-13
How do I know if my feelings are returned?
By DrillGirl Comments: 10, member since Thu Dec 29, 2011
On Tue Jan 31, 2012 07:08 PM

There's this girl on my dance team, and we go to school together (obviously cuz its a high school dance team) and have a whole bunch of classes together, and we talk a whole lot and even though we're the same age I'm sort of like her big sister because its her first year on the team and she doesn't dance outside of the team, and its my second year and I've been dancing for 12 years. Anyways, I'm really attracted to her, but I don't know how she feels. She has a boyfriend (I even helped him get at her) and she thinks she's straight, and I'm bi, but nobody really knows. I have never had a public relationship with another girl but one of my best friends and I have been intimate for a while. I guess I could come out to my team, but my mom would find out, and she told me when she saw a suggestive text from my lesbian friend that if I turned gay I will be homeschooled and sent to straight camp. And I can't just tell the team girl I like cuz the whole team would find out. The girl and I have seen each other change, hugged, hold hands a lot and nearly kissed. Please give me some advice!!

4 Replies to How do I know if my feelings are returned?

re: How do I know if my feelings are returned?
By Odessamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 11250, member since Tue Feb 26, 2002
On Tue Jan 31, 2012 07:12 PM
She's got a boyfriend, don't get involved.

If and when she becomes single, you ask her if she feels the same way about you that you do about her.

Erin.
::righteous babe::
re: How do I know if my feelings are returned?
By AlwaysOnStagePremium member Comments: 7417, member since Sun Apr 18, 2004
On Tue Jan 31, 2012 07:19 PM
Agreed: right now she's taken which trumps all else. It doesn't matter how she identifies as a sexual being and it doesn't matter that you like her...she's taken.

That said, you have to make a decision about your priorities. If your mom is serious about changing your life so dramatically if you enter a same-sex relationship, you should consider the possibility that you do not pursue one in any way (including obsessing over if your crush likes you) until you are no longer dependent on you mother for financial support. I would probably choose that...after all, I'd rather not have my early relationships tainted by my mom's views. Better to be out-in-the-open without qualms once unaccepting parents no longer hold your purse-strings.
re: How do I know if my feelings are returned?
By DrillGirl Comments: 10, member since Thu Dec 29, 2011
On Tue Feb 07, 2012 12:10 AM
Yeah, I guess your right, best not to stir things up until I'm independent.... I dont know of any other girls at my school that like girls also, but I guess for now my dance is the only thing I should focus on.... thanks guys!
re: How do I know if my feelings are returned?
By Theresamember has saluted, click to view salute photosPremium member Comments: 34891, member since Wed May 22, 2002
On Tue Feb 07, 2012 09:56 AM
^That's the trouble with conservative parents.

It's a safe bet you're not as alone as you feel. But unless you turn into a secret agent woman when it comes to your love life (and if mom's checking your phone, you're not as secret agent woman as you think you are...), you have to cool your heels, and at least give the appearance that you're following along with mom and dads clearly expressed wishes. When you're out on your own, and reasonably secure, you can be whoever you want to be.

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